I have had urge to clean house literally also...so it's not messy when people come in and we are gone.
What about getting rid of Disney movies and video games...does that stuff disqualify me from going in the RApture ?
I wonder about that...Also did you know that the Movie 'Shrek" when said backwards...as in backward masking says...."CURSE?"
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Let me try fundy logic.
Did you know that Shaloma when said backwards...as in backward masking says...."AMOLISH", which is vaguely similar to demolish, which is what happened to the twin towers on 9/11? Clearly, the terrorist strikes were foretold of in the holy bible.
Do Disney movies and videogames "disqualify [you] from going in the Rapture"?
Evidently the Rapture is like a contest now with obscure fine-print rules:
"Rapture is not open to employees of Satan Inc. or its subsidiaries, or to anyone who happens to own any Disney products, no matter how innocuous, or to residents of New Jersey. Rapture is void where prohibited by law."
~David D.G.
David D.G.: Haha, yeah, that's sort of what I was imagining. An angel comes down and surveys their lives and their very souls. "Devout believer in the Lord? Check. Life of service and holy devotion to Jesus? Check. Strong in faith? Check. Okay, they're good to go. Wait a minute. What's that? Tsk. A Mulan video. Fry in the Tribulation, sinner!"
And if you run Jesus' life backwards, he runs round taking fecal suppositories, suffering from bullimia, killing people like Lazarus then giving them leprosy, turning wine into water, getting a mountain of fishes and turning them into a handful and only giving them to one little boy.
Generally getting stupider and stupider and feebler and feebler until he dves feet first into Mary causing her enormous pain.
Shrek's name is, almost certainly, taken from the German word "schreck" (pronounced the same), meaning (as a noun) alarm, fright or (as an adjective) fearsome, alarming. I think it's related to the english word "shriek".
Stupid fundies, running around looking for backwards messages and bible codes when the answer is just one lingual category over.
Yeah and love backwards is evol and god backwards is dog and jesus backwards is susej (which sounds sexual) and eye backward is eye and what are the odds of THAT! And she is worried her house might be messy when she gets raptured and strangers might come in and see it?? That, alone, should disqualify her.
Well God, I lived my life virtuously, I never harmed a living soul, and I gave half of my salary to charity every year! I'm ready for my eternal reward!
"Really, did you watch Beauty and the Beast?!
Well, yeah. It was a great-
*trap door opens*
Ahhhhhhhhhhh!
I'm imagining this person throwing away all her childrens dvds/games because she won't get into heaven if she own's childrens films...
"Shaloma, for believing that Jesus was my only sun and that he gave his life... blah blah blah... I have granted you eternal life in heaven... Wait a second, it appears you owned a film titled shrek, which can be pronounced as curse backwards, for this attrocity I send you to hell for all eternity"
Unfortunatly, this stupidity is proclaimed by the EO (Evangelisch omroep --> Christian television network) in the Netherlands.
You can not watch the following movies/shows because they are evil and can be explained to be evil by portraying god and the bible etc etc and more of thsi crap:
- Snowwhite (Oh no, ah witch, BURN THE WITCH!)
- Bambi (Seriously, I can't begin to suspect how this can be evil)
- The Lion King (God dies becuase the devil tricks him or something like that crap)
- Finding Nemo (uhmm?)
- Mulan (Dragon anyone?)
- Teenage mutant Ninja Turtles
- Power Rangers
etc etc
... and they expect to be taken serious?
But, doesn't God already know you have those movies? He's supposed to be omnipresent, isn't he?
When I say Shrek backwards, it sounds like Kersh.
To me, Shrek said backwards souds more like kirsch than curse, but seeing as kirsch is alcoholic I guess that's also satanic to these idiots. Just about everything that's remotely fun is satanic to these idiots, come to think of it.
This is true. When I played Shrek backwards once while taking the holy drug Lotsious Suckingius Dickus, I heard a strange satanic message. Here is my transcription of it.
deaherof reh l na foepahs eht ni
bmuht reh dna regnif htiw bmud fo dnik gnikoolsaw ehs
dehs eht ni loot tseprahs eht t'nia i
em llor annog si dlrow eht em dlot ecno ydobemos
Shrek backwards may sound like curse, but Shrek forwards sounds like Shrek, and as we know, Shrek is love, Shrek is life.
If you didn't pray in tongues with "Pastor Gas" Tilton within 24 hours of buying each one of those videos asking for forgiveness for buying from the Disney Devil, any claims to the Rapture for you or anyone in your family are null and void.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmVdOYb6jUc
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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