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Quote# 11079

Open letter to Satan

Satan,
You have gained a foothold if not a stronghold here in recent days. You have pitted brother against brother, brother against sister, sister aganist brother and so on. You have sewn division, suspicion, jealousy, rage bitterness and more, AND IT STOPS NOW. SATAN I REBUKE YOU IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST. YOU HAVE NO DOMINION OVER THESE BOARDS OR ANY MEMBER HERE. IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST I BIND YOU AND CAST YOU OUT OF THESE DISCUSSION FORUMS. I CAST YOU OUT IN JESUS NAME!!!

Titus, CWS Talk! 81 Comments [4/22/2006 12:00:00 AM]
Fundie Index: 8
Submitted By: Jeremy PC
WTF?! || meh
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#201444
BurntBush

\"Your mother sews socks that smell\"

4/4/2007 9:03:49 PM

#201455
Chaoschaos

Lies!

You are not a qualified exorcist!

4/4/2007 9:08:47 PM

#201468
anti-nonsense

LOL it's a web-xorcism!

4/4/2007 9:20:30 PM

#201494
A Christian

May God Bless You!

4/4/2007 9:47:57 PM

#202526


I'm so happy that I have provided so much amusement for all of you.

BTW, ssdexecutor, you're darn right he is. Y'all have a nice day.

4/5/2007 5:37:58 PM

#203187
titus

Hey anti-nonsense

You misspelled WebEx-corcism! LOL.

4/6/2007 7:40:20 PM

#203189
titus

Hey Last Conformist,
\"jealouy\"????? Very funny. Where were you educated?

4/6/2007 7:42:04 PM

#203289
szenah

Yes, Satan is out to destroy Christians because He know's we belong to God.

Whoever thought up the tactic of blaming all doubt and creeping rational thought on \"attacks by Satan trying to destroy true Christians\" was brilliant. It gets the fundies too frightened to let any suspicion or confusion stay in their minds long enough to be dealt with.

4/6/2007 11:47:43 PM

#203506
Mr_Vorhias

Satan responds with a form letter:

Dear ___TITUS____,

Thank you for your fan letter. As you can plainly tell, Satan is very busy at the moment, and cannot answer all of his mail personally. Thanks all the same, though.

- Satan

4/7/2007 4:50:40 AM

#203811
titus

You guys are soooooo funny. Please stop. I'm gonna soil myself.

4/7/2007 4:36:16 PM

#203893
Tactics

You forgot to put enough stamps, It didnt get all the way to hell :<

4/7/2007 7:03:35 PM

#203931
Laurel

It's better than watching Success'N'Life! He doesn't even beg for money.

4/7/2007 8:03:07 PM

#205893
titus

Hey Tactics,
Maybe you could hand deliver it for me.

4/11/2007 1:29:28 AM

#205894
Siddhartha Gautama

Cast yourself out of a 45th story window.

Please.

4/11/2007 1:30:53 AM

#205904
titus

Oh Siddartha, you hurt my feelings

4/11/2007 1:47:33 AM

#205907
Alena

THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU! THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!

4/11/2007 1:50:46 AM

#205915
Satan

Capslock, my only weakness!

4/11/2007 2:15:32 AM

#206567
titus

I see you're not much on spelling either. LOL

4/11/2007 2:05:50 PM

#394812
yodaman23

SATAN BEWARE MY CAPITAL LETTERS! EMPHASIS THROUGH LETTER CASE IS A TOOL OF GOD!

1/30/2008 7:28:18 PM

#394820
Philbert McAdamia

Ti tus . . .

oh, Tie - Tussss

Get Out. GEDDTTT OOUUUDDDTTTT!


and please take DimWit with you. Hey, thanks.

1/30/2008 7:41:18 PM

#394821
Brain_In_A_Jar

There's a story in the new testament that says you shouldn't try to do this unless you're actually Jesus himself. Like so many others, you fail at knowledge of your own kooky religion.

1/30/2008 7:41:31 PM

#394842
Parallax

Satan is scared shitless now. (/sarcasm)

1/30/2008 8:21:15 PM

#394963
Marlowe

http://imdb.com/title/tt0469494/

1/30/2008 11:56:59 PM

#394989
(H9)

LOL, shut up.

1/31/2008 12:21:05 AM

#394992
TerriblyAmused

Wow. This is totally awesome.
If this guy wasn't serious, I'd so buy him a beer.

1/31/2008 12:24:37 AM
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