usachinanukewar #fundie usachinanukewar.wordpress.com

let me tell all of my viewers my dream eternal life, that is, I wanna hang out with Jesus, kissing Him and eating His saliva while kissing Him all day long and all night long on Monday. Just melt down myself into the arms of Jesus on His gorgeous shirtless, immortal white skin chest.

And, on Tuesday, I wanna have a gorgeous Scarlett Johansson as my lovely newlywed wife and we do wild things all day long, because she’s not gotta be immortal in the New Millennium. She’s in earthly flesh. So, after a whole day bustling doing all the wild things such as — all naked, you know what I mean, I’ll let her go to bed, sleeping.

And, Wed. for Jesus, and Thurs. for her. Jesus and her take turns to be my lovers in every single week of my New Millennium eternal life. That’s perfect. Two lovers. Jesus and her. It’s just so perfect. My boyfriend and Husband, Lord Jesus Christ, an immortal gorgeous white man with a little bit sun-tan. My newlywed wife, a Scarlett Johansson I’m gotta meet in the New Millennium, is a gorgeous white woman with big boos, blonde hair, and blue eyes, so stunning beautiful, my No.1. favorite type of woman. Oh, baby, I’m gotta be the happiest man ever in the New Millennium with 2 lovers, Jesus and her, and I’m immortally gorgeous.

And, I’m gotta be very rich at that time, because I have the real ultra-richest super sugar daddy, Lord Jesus Christ. This is so extremely awesome, my dream eternal life in the New Millennium Era reigned by Jesus for 1000 years.

Actually, I’m Peter Alexander the Great. I’m truly Alexander the Great. oh baby, just my dream after browsing so many crazy news, I need some dream to sustain my horrified mind and heart.

30 comments

Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register. Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.