Quote# 132870

Man the kingdom Is going to be amazing. Imagine never having to work again, going to the beach with one of your many wives, then coming home and crack a Edomite over the head with a golden scepter.

Asar'el Ben Israel, Facebook 16 Comments [10/11/2017 2:41:15 PM]
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Pharaoh Bastethotep

The jokes are writing themselves.

10/11/2017 2:43:20 PM

You had me until you wanted to be violent in heaven. I mean the beach, never having to work and the wives as long as all were cool with polygamy sounds great. Being violent not so much

10/11/2017 2:49:50 PM

actually you're supposed to spend the rest of eternity praising your God and doing nothing else. Which kind of sounds like hell to me.

10/11/2017 2:53:28 PM

The Angry Dybbuk

what fun

10/11/2017 3:45:01 PM

Pharaoh Bastethotep

10/11/2017 3:58:22 PM

Citizen Justin

The quotee is one of those black guys who thinks that his brethren are the real Jews.

Unfortunately he is serious.

I am one of those men who finds the idea of being married to one person horrific. The idea of many doesn't even bear thinking about. As for Edomites, whatever they are they can't help being. And he's in your home? Sounds like how some people used to treat the blacks.

10/11/2017 4:41:16 PM


...or Aussie ponies Crack Tubes while Sheilas hit Arse'al over the head with Twicane. /)^3^(\

10/11/2017 7:12:10 PM


Oh, sorry about those "wives", but when they go to heaven they will deserve better than that.

10/11/2017 7:20:55 PM

rubber chicken

What are your many wives being punished for ?

10/11/2017 8:22:06 PM

Shepard Solus

You can spot the religious monsters pretty easily. Their ideas of Heaven invariably include making it someone else's Hell.

Also: that's not the Heaven your god promised. Your god promised you an eternity of constantly worshipping & serving him. The only way your going to the beach is if Yahweh decides he needs a vacation.

10/12/2017 1:14:28 AM

Yossarian Lives

Nah, you won't be able to enjoy the latter, as to do that you'll need to be in Hell where the Edomites will be. Having said that, your polygamous views may cause you to end up there so you might get your wish.

10/12/2017 5:17:35 AM

Pharaoh Bastethotep

Meanwhile in reality, Asar'el Ben Israel is still incompetent, lazy and rude at his job, still refuses to leave his man-cave in his parent's basement unless necessary, is still a hopeless virgin with absolutely no loveable qualities, is still an out-of-shape coward who could not win a fight against a mannequin, and his "golden scepter" is still tiny. And so it shall be till the end of his pathetic existence.

10/12/2017 6:03:52 AM


Wow... you can't even describe paradise without senseless murder. Get help.

10/12/2017 6:18:37 AM


The kingdom, hey. Seems like your idea of heaven is everybody else's hell. Now that says a lot.

10/12/2017 8:04:19 AM


So, you remove the wordly laws of God, and gave these people paradise, and they see it as license to by lazy, polygamous, and violent. Nice to see them being so frank about their immorality.

10/12/2017 9:20:44 PM

Funny how the most enticing thing about Heaven is the prospect of sinning your ass off except that it's just no longer a sin for some reason.

10/12/2017 9:45:04 PM

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