Quote# 31399

The Internet was created by the United States of America - a Christian nation [ref. 1, 2, 3] - and should not be used to spread anti-Christian, secular, or non-Christian propaganda and hatespeech. This is our Internet, and we should exercise our position as its owners and as the guardians of civilization to stop its misuse.

[The rest of the page is a veritable goldmine!]

Jim Carlson, Objective Ministries 52 Comments [11/21/2007 1:04:33 AM]
Fundie Index: 6
Submitted By: Lucan

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Zoony The Lazoon

If I, as an Englishman, may make so bold:


Thank you.

11/21/2007 1:12:33 AM


Internet was created by educated intelligent people, get off my internet!

11/21/2007 1:29:41 AM


Where is that Bill Plympton image of a guy getting hit in the face by a fist coming from computer screen when you need it?

11/21/2007 1:35:42 AM


Was the internet created by the U.S.? I have heard otherwise, but I don't know, really.

Either way, whoever created it no longer owns it. The internet is for porn.

11/21/2007 1:37:13 AM


We do all recall that Objective Ministries is a parody site, right? If I recall correctly, it was created by the same guy that does Landover Baptist.

FSTDT needs to keep a list of known poes and parodies to help prevent these mistakes.

11/21/2007 1:42:07 AM


"The Internet was created..."

No no no. The internet evolved out of other, pre-existing networks.

11/21/2007 1:53:52 AM

Brian X

That "gold mine" is filled with pyrite. Objective Ministries is a parody. Completely poker-faced, but a parody.


It may be Landover-connected, but the rumor is that it was originally started by Lyle Zapato of Aluminum Foil Deflector Beanie fame. The WHOIS records don't bear that out though.

11/21/2007 1:58:11 AM

Ansem the Wise

Ha hahahhahahahhahahahhahahahhahahaha.



... oh god it burns.

11/21/2007 2:00:19 AM


Poe, Poe, a thousand times Poe!

11/21/2007 2:35:18 AM

TB Tabby

Poe's Law has been violated more often than it's been upheld.

11/21/2007 2:46:32 AM


This site is actually a very funny parody site created by the Landover Baptist crowd. It fooled me at first until I really dug into it.

11/21/2007 3:17:34 AM


The internet is not an invention of the USA, it has been developed by physicans to share their knowledge....you kn ow, ebil edumacated people !
Ever heard of the CERN ? No ? Ok....and now, please go off our internet and go back to the bronce age.

11/21/2007 3:32:29 AM


Objective Ministries? Who submitted this, the entire site's a poe, like Landover Baptist.

11/21/2007 4:02:16 AM

Doctor Fishcake

I knew someone would submit Objective sooner or later! Don't feel bad though, it's the best Poe on the net right now, so much so that it's resided at times on Christian hosting services blissfully unaware it was a parody.


11/21/2007 4:14:01 AM

Mister Spak

"The Internet was created by the United States of America - a secular nation [ and should not be used to spread anti-science, fundie, or non-science propaganda and hatespeech. This is our Internet, and we should exercise our position as its owners and as the guardians of civilization to stop its misuse.


11/21/2007 6:15:33 AM

Good luck with that buddy.

11/21/2007 6:23:52 AM

Internet was patented in UK, with the money of many nations, secular and non-christian. And the Americans who participated were as non-Christian as your constitution.

11/21/2007 6:31:49 AM

Quoth the Raven.

11/21/2007 6:36:16 AM


It was me that submitted this one. If it is indeed a Poe (which, having clicked on the link above, seems to be the case) then, well...my bad. I found it via a link (I forget where) from a site that was most definitely taken in by it. And then I myself was well and truly suckered by it.

Again, my bad.

Didn't they do awfully well, though?

11/21/2007 6:50:54 AM


Treaty of Tripoli. That is all.

11/21/2007 7:26:13 AM


Isn't Objective Ministries a parody? Correct me if I'm wrong...

11/21/2007 7:30:04 AM


Evidently so, Salvador. Like I said, my bad.

11/21/2007 7:58:48 AM

big baby jesus

hey guys i think this might be a parody, hope this hasnt already been said a dozen times

11/21/2007 9:40:43 AM


I'll bet you think Bush and Jesus cofounded America too

11/21/2007 10:06:31 AM

Count Spatula

Objective Ministries is a parody.

11/21/2007 10:14:31 AM

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