Starting August 1st I got a promotion! Right before that we were looking into buying a brand new car, so the timing was perfect. Isn't God good?! Yes!
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So, does that mean that God isn't so good when things DON'T manage to work out your way? Or is he still good if things work out great for someone else of a different persuasion (e.g., an atheist, a pagan, an agnostic), even if the same occurrence that causes you grief?
~David D.G.
Yes, because Jesus was such an advocate of mindless consumerism, retail therapy and material desires.
I believe he was crucified for inventing "I Can't believe it's not Manna", as well as knocking out the first Fillet O' Fish Happy Meals for 5,000 consumers.
So anyway, of course he who lives by the sword dies by the sword and a few of his projects went belly up, and a focus group turned nasty when he failed a Pilate survey. (9/10 mobs prefer Barrabas)
OK, those little green bits of paper that say, "In God we trust," AREN'T actually God.
Or to quote Douglas Adams:
Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the Western Spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small, unregarded yellow sun. Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea...
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This planet has - or rather had - a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.
I moved 240 kilometers to join husband at his new job. One year later I was laid off due to the financial crisis from the US, just when we were starting to look for a house in the new region. God is not so good to us.
What makes you so important in God's eyes, and what did we do wrong? We are still members of the church and pay taxes, we were married in the church, we are faithful to each other, and do our best to treat others as we want to be treated.
"Starting August 1st I got a promotion! Right before that we were looking into buying a brand new car, so the timing was perfect. Isn't God good?! Yes!"
'There is no such thing as coincidence in this world. There is only Hitsuzen* .'
-Yuuko ("xxxHOLiC")
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*- 'Necessity'
Yes, as anyone who has read the parable of Lazarus and the rich man can tell you, god's only desire is to load its followers up with material things. God is your own personal genie, right? All hail god, god gives me bling!
"Starting August 1st I got a promotion! Right before that we were looking into buying a brand new car, so the timing was perfect. Isn't God good?! Yes!"
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'No.'
-Yuuko 'There is no such thing as Coincidence in this world. There is only Hitsuzen ('Inevitability')' the Dimensional Witch, "xxxHOLiC"
>:D
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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