Quote# 46017

Recently, a friend of ours was prayed for by another minister. Through Discernment, the minister praying for her saw pentagrams (8 pointed star) drawn on her liver. She had been diagnosed with Hepatitis C (a disease effecting the liver and other body parts). The minister did not know this.

While praying for her, the Lord showed us that we could take the Blood of Jesus and “erase” these evil lines drawn on her liver or any part of her body. So we prayed this way:

Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver or any parts of our body, soul, will, and emotions.

Note that this is a “spiritual” act of erasure, just like when we do Spiritual Warfare and pull out all fiery darts, pins, needles, etc. where there is pain in our bodies.

Stan and Elizabeth Madrak, Demonbuster 53 Comments [8/27/2008 8:23:56 PM]
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Old Viking

"What does the scan show, doctor?"

"Evil lines on her liver."

8/27/2008 8:26:23 PM

Funnyguts

Penta != eight. The whole thing fails right there.

8/27/2008 8:26:47 PM

Haeron

Gahahahaha, an 8-pointed PENTAgram!?

Moron.

8/27/2008 8:28:26 PM

emau99

Pentagrams have 5 points.

So, was your friend miraculously cured of her Hep. C with the Blood of Jesus?

Thought not.

8/27/2008 8:28:47 PM

pete

"Then, her liver shut down and she went to Heaven. Praise Jesus"!

There. I finished the story for them.

8/27/2008 8:31:42 PM



[n]Recently, a friend of ours was prayed for by another minister.[/b]
Whoo-pee-doo.

Through Discernment, the minister praying for her saw pentagrams (8 pointed star) drawn on her liver.
Pentagrams have five points and have been used by Christians for an eternity to ward off dead spirits.

She had been diagnosed with Hepatitis C (a disease effecting the liver and other body parts). The minister did not know this.
How fucking likely.

8/27/2008 8:34:46 PM

John

With all the people who have died while suffering from hepatitis, you'd think some doctor would have noticed the "eight pointed pentagrams" [sic] on their livers.

8/27/2008 8:35:54 PM

Fera

A pentagram does not have 8 points, moron. It has "Penta" in the name for a reason!

8/27/2008 8:43:20 PM

Gawd


That is one of the most fucked-up websites I've ever seen. I especially like the link at the bottom of demonbusters, "Do you need skincare or makeup products?".

8/27/2008 8:43:39 PM

Elphada

seriously....are these people for real or just batshit crazy?
Plus they all pray to break the power of witches and I've yet to see a spark out of my fingertips unless it's static electricity pulling clothes out of the dryer. I turned my ankle and fell about 4 feet sweeping our cabin's porch. I'm going to count that as flying on my broom.

....but evil lines on the friggin' liver?


oh...Stan and Lizzy? It's PENT. look it up. I hope the computer demon gets you

8/27/2008 8:47:05 PM

Patashu

Pentagrams are 8-pointed? ...ON her liver?

8/27/2008 8:47:16 PM

TenshiFuzz

Aaaahahaha. Man, I freakin' love Demonbuster.

8/27/2008 8:48:34 PM

Papabear

"minister praying for her saw pentagrams (8 pointed star) drawn on her liver."

You "know" that pentagrams are evil and you're deadset against them, but you don't even know what they are.


"I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver or any parts of our body"

You share a liver? You share a body?


"just like when we do Spiritual Warfare and pull out all fiery darts, pins, needles, etc. where there is pain in our bodies."

Would you start praying that you'll stop being a pain in my neck?

8/27/2008 8:50:46 PM

struby

That's all well and good, but she still had Hepatitis, didn't she...

Cause, you know, hepatitis is a virus, not a spirit.

Lemme simplify that.


Hepatitis you can see, spirit you can't.

8/27/2008 8:51:42 PM

Senator

I thought Demonbuster was an "Onion" like site. I swear it was debunked as a parody in another quote.

If not, holy crap. Voodoo for Jesus!

8/27/2008 8:55:02 PM

Another Atheist

New Blood of Jesus!
Guaranteed to remove any and all annoying demonic lines, whether from clothes, skin or internal organs.
Pick up Blood of Jesus today from your local faith pharmacy/laundrette, only 2 sacrificed goats and an internet post insulting the non-christian group of your choice per 500g packet!
Order now to get your free coupon for a D.I.Y crucifixion, becoming a martyr has never been easier!

8/27/2008 8:55:55 PM

maevemab

@ Elphada

Hahahahaha...witchy brooms are dangerous...hahahaha

That was good. I needed that laugh after reading the Demonbuster bullshit. Seriously, do these people ever look anything up?

8/27/2008 8:57:04 PM

Staccato

8-pointed star?

ONG CHAOS UNDIVIDED!

*geeks out*

8/27/2008 8:58:08 PM

L

Faith Healing: Because a proven method of healing people is never as good as the placebo effect! :D

8/27/2008 9:05:10 PM

Philip from Australia

Quote: She had been diagnosed with Hepatitis C (a disease effecting the liver and other body parts). The minister did not know this.

Oh, really? Were you with this minister the whole time? He never spoke with the medical staff? Never sneaked a peek at the records? Or... assuming that this minister actually never had the chance for some background checking... Maybe he noticed that the patient was jaundiced. Yellow. Kind of obvious sometimes. And usually indicates a liver issue.

That's right. It was a cold reading. But done medically.

8 pointed pentagrams?? No wonder she's sick. The warping of the Euclidean space would be painful.

Philip

8/27/2008 9:09:54 PM

D Laurier

Batshit fucking insanity.

8/27/2008 9:10:44 PM

oidhche

Learn to fucking count.

8/27/2008 9:15:32 PM

Horsefeathers

"Through Discernment, the minister praying for her saw pentagrams (8 pointed star) drawn on her liver."

Pentagrams have five points genius.

"She had been diagnosed with Hepatitis C (a disease effecting the liver and other body parts). The minister did not know this."

And? There's only so many organs he could have chosen to begin with.

"While praying for her, the Lord showed us that we could take the Blood of Jesus and “erase” these evil lines drawn on her liver or any part of her body."

You're screwy. I'm not sure what else to say.

"So we prayed this way:

Father, In Jesus' Name, I take the Blood of Jesus and break the power of all witches, warlocks, wizards, satanists, sorcerers, wiccans, pagans, and any other source, and all of their rituals off of us. With the Blood of Jesus, I erase all evil lines drawn on our liver or any parts of our body, soul, will, and emotions."


I thought casting spells was against your religion? Oh, wait, it's okey-dokey if you call it "praying" instead. Gotcha.

"Note that this is a “spiritual” act of erasure, just like when we do Spiritual Warfare and pull out all fiery darts, pins, needles, etc. where there is pain in our bodies."

Yeah, I'm going to have to reiterate my "screwy" remark from above.

8/27/2008 9:29:53 PM

Chancellor Gorkon

Sounds like witchcraft fighting witchcraft to me.

(My apologies to any witches on this board.)

8/27/2008 9:30:52 PM

Mike


8/27/2008 9:32:51 PM

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