David J. Stewart, Jesus-is-savior

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Quote# 53665

I've never heard so much disgraceful music as I've heard on the radio this year at Christmas time. It's sickening. Many Christmas songs have a rock music beat, others are sang by known homosexuals, some songs are sang so fast that it's utterly annoying. There's songs about wanting front teeth back for Christmas, going on a sleigh ride...anything to remove Jesus Christ from the minds of people. It's so sad. It's like a broken tooth and a foot out of joint to hear the despicable Dolly Parton singing Christmas carols. In 1982 Dolly starred in a vile movie, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas. The movie is still highly sought by perverts today. Do you know what the movie is all about? It is about a town Sheriff and regular patrons of the whorehouse, fighting to keep the whorehouse open when a TV preacher targets it as the Devils playhouse. And you listen to her hypocritical Christmas music. Dolly just re-recorded an old Led Zeppelin song, Stairway to Heaven. Then there's Johnny Cash's Christmas album. Did you know he re-recorded two songs by Glenn Danzig, a known Satanist? Glenn Danzig, spewing his hatred for the Lord Jesus Christ, proudly designed a logo for the band — a demon strangling Jesus Christ with blood gushing from Jesus' eyes! I'm not trying to be unkind; I'm just being honest when I tell you that Satan is getting into everything nowadays. No Christ-honoring Christian should listen to the music of Dolly Parton, Johnny Cash, or any other entertainer who promotes Satan.

David J. Stewart, Jesus-is-savior 81 Comments [12/2/2008 2:32:06 PM]
Fundie Index: 9

WTF?! || meh

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#793423

Whitespirit

Poe is poe. No-one can seriously say that about

All I Want for Xmas is my Two Front Teeth.

12/2/2008 2:33:53 PM

#793424

Mortok

And don't forgot those heathens, The Bangles, commanding us to 'walk like egyptians' (why would we want to emulate those filthy creatures that enslaved our people?), and their blasphemous talk of sunday being a 'fun day'. How dare they mock the sabbath!

12/2/2008 2:33:54 PM

#793425

Skyknight

Er, don't you fear you're being TOO fixated on Jesus's glory?

12/2/2008 2:34:02 PM

#793426

The L

You're right! Festive songs have no place in a celebration of a deity's birthday! The only Christmas carols allowed should be somber religious tunes, like "Lo, How a Rose E'er Blooming" and "Let All Mortal Flesh Keep Silence." Those upbeat tunes like "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" and "Joy to the World" are just so un-Christian!

David needs to pull the stick out of his ass--he's coughing up splinters now.

12/2/2008 2:35:21 PM

#793443

aaa

Sir, you can't stop rock and roll.

12/2/2008 2:42:07 PM

#793448

Xotan

David, how do you know it was a vile movie? Have you been attending the cinema dressed in a mackintosh, and sitting in the back row hoping for a young man to sit next to you??? Or are you just watching it on the VCR waiting for saucy bits?

I've never seen it, so I am wondering how come you know so much more about it than I do.

Also, I don't find Ms. Parton half as evil as you.

12/2/2008 2:47:11 PM

#793458

Alex

Axel Rose does a kick-ass cover of White Christmas.

12/2/2008 2:53:17 PM

#793461

Dan Onymous

Isn't Dolly Parton a bit old for you to be frothing over Dave? Her great grandchildren might be about the right age for you.

12/2/2008 2:54:52 PM

#793463

Quasarsphere

Anyone who'd get a stiffy from "The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas" would have to be a pervert!

Something you want to tell us, Mr Stewart?

12/2/2008 2:54:53 PM

#793468

ID82

That reminds me of the venture brothers episode where doctor venture rents the "best little whorehouse in texas," in hopes to see dolly partons tits. Only to be dissapointed in the end.

12/2/2008 2:57:17 PM

#793473

a mind far far away

Is this all David can do? Rant about how much he hates everything. Hey David, quit taking Lewis Black's personality, he's better at it, and alot funnier.

12/2/2008 3:00:11 PM

#793486

Dolly Parton recorded Stairway to Heaven? Yuck if it's true but I sort of doubt it. And Johnny Cash recorded a couple of Trent Reznor's songs, not Danzig's. This dumbass can't even keep his lies straight.

12/2/2008 3:09:33 PM

#793497

They call me V

Ah... good ole' DJS, the holidays, or any other time for that matter, just isn't the same without you. Well, I'll look at the bright side, at least he's stopped drooling and/or raging in self-contempt over child stars.

12/2/2008 3:16:48 PM

#793505

Mister Spak

"others are sang by known homosexuals,"

Homos singing christmas songs are part of the war on christmas.

12/2/2008 3:21:30 PM

#793507

Deep Search

Yeah... Best Little Whorehouse in Texas isn't actually a porno. Like Dr. Venture, if you watch it hoping to get off, you'll be rather disappointed.

Has this guy really never heard secular holiday music before? 9__9

12/2/2008 3:22:11 PM

#793508

GreenEyedLilo

I'd give him a Bob Rivers Christmas CD. (http://www.bobrivers.com/audiovault/tunes/xmastunes.asp) The only trouble is, when his head explodes, some poor person will have to clean it up, and I wouldn't want to inconvenience them like that.

12/2/2008 3:23:12 PM

#793511

deadyeti

I like the fact that the first part of the link to the website reads
http://www.jesus-is-savior.com/False

i think i might be still drunk from last night

12/2/2008 3:24:15 PM

#793512

kingoftheheavies

What, no kiddie-porn fantasies today Dave?

12/2/2008 3:25:00 PM

#793515

JohnTheAtheist

David is WAY out of touch again thinking that pervs like Best Little Whorehouse. That being said I think you could make a case for stating that Dolly Parton shoudln't sing xmas carols because she has huge tits that I'm sure the lord despises.

12/2/2008 3:26:09 PM

#793532

Katsuro

Davey boy is still publicly displaying his sexual issuses I see.

12/2/2008 3:31:33 PM

#793555

gargoyle1

@ John the Atheist:

"That being said I think you could make a case for stating that Dolly Parton shoudln't sing xmas carols because she has huge tits that I'm sure the lord despises."

Are you kidding? Who do you think gave them to her?

AND I JUST WANNA PRAISE HIM FOR IT!

12/2/2008 3:41:34 PM

#793556

12/2/2008 3:41:42 PM

#793558

Doctor Whom

I knew there was something I liked about Dolly Parton.

12/2/2008 3:42:41 PM

#793573

anonymous

Well the songs are about secular Christmas, you don't have to listen to them.

12/2/2008 3:47:32 PM

#793576

Jack Bauer

This is the sort of thing we should all be listening to over Christmas:

12/2/2008 3:49:01 PM

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