Quote# 54147
(Pedo rapture fundie porn)
"Here daddy!"
"No silly, the black chips! These are supposed be the chocolate chip cookies remember?" <ruffles his son's hair>
"These?"
"Perfect, thanks! Sweetie, where's the big pan?"
"Here Ashley, can you hand this to your dad?"
"Daddy, who gets these cookies? Are these for the neighbors too?"
"Not these, remember the family we took the food to last weekend? That's who these are for!"
"I like them, can we take the puppy a treat too?"
"Sure we...."
<pan slams to ground>
"Daddy? MOMMY? What was that?"
"You heard it? What about you sweetie? The trumpet?"
<giggle> "It tickles!"
"Do you feel the tingling? Don't be scared, remember what we've been telling you? It's time! Here, let's hold hands! Don't be scared!"
"Wheeeeeeeee!!!!!!"
"Whoooooooo!!!!!"
"PRAISE the LOOOOOOOOOOOORD!"
Tres Wright,
RR 95 Comments [12/12/2008 8:47:50 PM]
Fundie Index: 18
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#807244
Exmuslim Turk.
...
wat
12/12/2008 8:49:51 PM
#807246
Oh god please don't ever, ever, ever write any more fanfiction.
*full-body dry-heaves*
12/12/2008 8:50:08 PM
#807249
OhSoHappyNow...
Weird, and very uncomfortable.
12/12/2008 8:52:24 PM
#807251
Bad fanfic. Needs to be sporked.
12/12/2008 8:53:17 PM
#807252
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
:'D
12/12/2008 8:53:42 PM
#807254
12/12/2008 8:55:15 PM
#807261
Raybees
lolwut
12/12/2008 8:56:40 PM
#807264
It's a WTF goldmine! The whole thread is full of bad rapture fanfiction! Comedy gold here people, comedy gold.
12/12/2008 8:57:05 PM
#807268
Allegory for Jesus
"LOOOOOOOOOOOORD"
Did you turn into a ghost during the middle of that word, or something?
"Whoooooooo!!!!!"
Or...an owl?
12/12/2008 8:58:52 PM
#807269
Sisyphus
Dude! What did I TAKE last night? That was like, totally incomprehensible!
12/12/2008 8:59:09 PM
#807274
aaa
The aristocrats!
12/12/2008 9:00:31 PM
#807278
Berny
These people are pathetic. I would comment further but I feel it's bad form to make fun of the mentally handicapped.
12/12/2008 9:02:18 PM
#807284
The Outsider
This is just bizarre. What is this little story supposed to say to us?
12/12/2008 9:04:17 PM
#807285
emau99
I can see the article in the paper the following morning:
Authorities say the Wright family would be alive today if they'd had a carbon monoxide detector in their home.
12/12/2008 9:05:13 PM
#807293
Canadiest
WTF
12/12/2008 9:06:48 PM
#807296
Knotilus
Whatthe... I... it... WHAT?
12/12/2008 9:07:21 PM
#807297
Well we know these people aren't from Rapture Ready cause they never give anybody anything except a hard time and condemnation.
12/12/2008 9:07:24 PM
#807300
TheReligiousCommie
This is the strongest argument a fundamentalist has ever made against drugs.
12/12/2008 9:08:43 PM
#807304
Ken
At least they're baking cookies for the homeless instead of using the toilet this time.
Oh, Obama didn't get raptured in their story. Whoddathunk? It seems that the Raptards were the only ones preventing him from turning the country into a police state and after the Rapture, we'll be hit by bombs from the Middle East. Golly!
12/12/2008 9:10:26 PM
#807309
GreenEyedLilo
I think "the Three Bears" is way better as a bedtime story, even the version I told my little brother where the bears divided Goldilocks into a big piece, a medium piece, and a baby-sized piece.
12/12/2008 9:13:30 PM
#807310
Grigori Yefimovich
Satanically, I began reading this backwards:
DROOOOOOOOOOOOL...
12/12/2008 9:13:57 PM
#807316
Horsefeathers
Well now, that was disturbing on multiple levels.
12/12/2008 9:15:03 PM
#807324
Illuminatalie
Must sign off soon as rush is coming ohgodohgodohgod get'em all off me! They're everywhere, and green! WERPOWERJP$#@&*$&@&&$(*&#@&Y@#&($#
Whew. The rush always gets me that way.
12/12/2008 9:17:02 PM
#807326
Asuka
....What?
12/12/2008 9:18:02 PM
#807330
werewolf
Moral lesson: watch out for hallucinogenics in chocolate chip cookies.
It is just wrong to feed these to children.
12/12/2008 9:19:46 PM
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