Quote# 62876

I have found that atheists are fictional. Here is my proof:

1) Put an atheist on the front lines and let the bullets start flying and the bombs start exploding and the atheists will beat the Christians to their knees praying to God that they make it home safely. Now, if you don't believe in God, then who are you praying to?

2) Put a gun to an atheists head and tell him to renounce atheism and praise God and they will do it in a heartbeat. They are not ready to die for their fictional convictions. On the flip side of that, most of the Christians that I know will die for God and for Christ. We would never let anyone force us into renouncing our faith in the Most High God.

AtheistsAreFictional, Y! answers 140 Comments [6/1/2009 10:04:15 PM]
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1. Pat Tillman

2. It's called "survival instinct".

6/1/2009 10:08:41 PM


Well, it is so often the way, sir, too late one thinks of what one *should* have said. Sir Thomas More, for instance -- burned alive
for refusing to recant his Catholicism -- must have been kicking him-self, as the flames licked higher, that it never occurred to him
to say, "I recant my Catholicism."

- Edmund Blackadder

6/1/2009 10:10:27 PM


Ah, threats of violence, feel the Christian love.

And this, mate, is why torture doesn't work. You threaten someone with their life, they'll lie their face off.

You people living in your comfortable little world filled with absolutely no fucking struggle at all, if someone where to do the same to you, threaten your life unless you renounced your faith, you'd crack. Believe me.

6/1/2009 10:15:00 PM


1)Lying for Jesus
2) Common sense for the win!

6/1/2009 10:16:59 PM


Ummm, no.
My father, an Atheist, went to Afganistan for 18 months and came back still an Atheist.

The same way happened to some of Free Thinker soldiers who went to Iraq.

6/1/2009 10:18:10 PM

Thinking Allowed

We would never let anyone force us into renouncing our faith in the Most High God.

Are you sure about that? Do you know any atheists or christians that acted in the way you have suggested?

6/1/2009 10:19:18 PM


Because the person most capable of rational thought is the one whose life is seconds away from its end. Right.

Also, is this some sadistic fantasy for you? It sounds vaguely like it. I don't fantasize about shooting theists...

6/1/2009 10:28:55 PM

Lord Mushroom

If atheists are fictional, they don't really exist... then what are you worried about?

6/1/2009 10:32:50 PM

Elf Sternberg

Every Christian in every war, who wore body armor, who stayed inside the APC, who jumped into a foxhole, is an atheist. There are no Christians on the battlefield. Because every Christian who took cover whenever the bullets went flying is someone who, at that moment, doubted the existence of a merciful God who would do the right thing when it came to bullets.

6/1/2009 10:42:06 PM


This must be that Christian love and morality I keep hearing about.

6/1/2009 10:44:17 PM

atheist crusader

holy fuck batman, I DONT EXIST

and i tell you what fella, you put a gun to this atheists head and ill blow yours clean fucking off, and thats a promise.

and incidently if we are going to die for for some small uninportant shit like hmm i dunno FREEDOM perhaps it may be worth it, but to say there are no atheists in foxholes is just stupid. Im sure theres a shit load of the british armed forces that dont belive in your pretend god, and possibly american too

Religion: allowing people to be terminally stupid since 2,000 bc

6/1/2009 11:05:39 PM

The Jamo

So what you're saying is that if I put a gun to your head and ask you to believe in Shiva, you won't pretend to do it to save your own ass? If so, that makes you a class-A idiot.

Class dismissed.

6/1/2009 11:06:18 PM


Yeah, put a gun to my head, and I'll tell you that I believe Xenu is having a three way with Thor and Shiva right now. That doesn't mean I believe it, it means that dying for the sake of utter pride (And that's what this is, buddy...nothing more, and nothing less) is as stupid as you can get.

6/1/2009 11:20:42 PM


I’m a 21 year veteran who put "Atheist" on my dog tags as soon I figured out that "NO PREF REC" still meant a dumb-assed protestant chaplain would pray over my corpse. I definitely had a preference: none. I had to do it myself, though, because the battalion personal action center (PAC) wouldn’t make them for me.

You know what chaplains are good for? Candy. Those motherfuckers always carried hard candy in their rucksacks because they had vehicles and didn’t need to hump like us and they didn’t need the space for bullets, water, equipment, etc. You could always count on the chaplain for a root beer barrel when the going got tough. Thanks, chaplain.

My CV: Operation Golden Pheasant (Honduras – I was 6 months in the Army!), Operation Just Cause (Panama), the first gulf war, Operation Joint Guard (Bosnia), Operation Shining Hope (Albania/Kosovo/Macedonia), Operation Iraqi Freedom (um…Iraq?). I’ve never prayed to their god (or gods, for those polytheists) once. Not once. Know why? 1) He (she or they) is (are) fictional and 2) prayer is not a tactic and hope doesn’t get your guys back home to momma.

Fuck you.


@ Elf Sternberg

Good thought. I never looked at it like that. If they're so sure about their pleasant afterlife with Jeebus, why didn't they stand up and take the bullets for their buddies? You know what I would do to any one of my Soldiers I saw praying instead of shooting?

6/1/2009 11:21:31 PM

Dio Fa

1. Is that why so many body bags filled with soldiers come back to your country? Instead of fighting or fleeing, the Christians are on their knees, praying.

2. Why wouldn't an atheist praise God with a gun to his head? Or Santa Claus? Or the Easter Bunny? The atheist doesn't believe in any of them.

3. I don't think it's your god that's high.

6/1/2009 11:24:10 PM


are you ready to prove your statement?

6/1/2009 11:26:09 PM


Congratulations! it's exactly as we've been saying: atheism is not a faith.

6/1/2009 11:29:13 PM


Someone else who's never read Orwell - put a man under enough physical or mental pressure, he'll believe anything you want.

I ask you, what's more pathetic - someone who cracks under extreme pressure and starts thinking irrationally, or fundies like yourself who believe idiotic shit without being under any such pressure whatsoever, and in fact tend to lead quite comfortable, sheltered, affluent existences?

6/1/2009 11:39:20 PM

Swedish Pagan

1. You don't have to pray to anything or anyone. A prayer is just a very strong wish or request.

2. If someone puts a gun to your head, I bet you would renounce everyone and everything if that would let you live. You can always be reborn again after you have survived. Till someone has actually put that gun to your head, you have no idea how you will react.

6/1/2009 11:43:32 PM

Agnostic Antagonist

In the name of Humanity, I promise you that if you put a gun to my head, my wife's head, or anyone I hold dear, you had best pull the trigger and make sure I am dead, because I would do my best to take your life. How dare you? HOW FUCKING DARE YOU, YOU VILE, TWISTED PIECE OF MAGGOT-INFESTED SHIT?

6/2/2009 12:12:39 AM

"No atheists in foxholes" is just an expression. Personally, I would be more worried about actually keeping myself alive than falling to my knees and standing still praying.

Atheism doesn't involve convictions; it is the lack of religious conviction. The reason they'll renounce atheism and praise God is because they know that the psycho with the gun will shoot them if they don't, and they'd rather just do that and survive.

6/2/2009 12:19:19 AM


1 - I wouldn't be on my knees, I'd be laying flat on stomach, behind cover, returning fire or keeping my head down. But feel free to sit up straight if you want.

2 - Yeah, with a gun to my head, I'd confess to being a unicorn in disguise. I'd much prefer to live for my non-beliefs.

6/2/2009 12:21:42 AM

Higgs Boson

What is it with fabricating fantasy scenarios where you prove yourself correct? Isn't that something that only children do?

6/2/2009 12:32:47 AM

Paschal Wagner

"'There are no atheists in foxholes' isn't an argument against atheists; it's an argument against foxholes." - James Morrow

Also, you've proven yourself to be a sadistic asshole. If there's a hell, you're headed for it.

6/2/2009 12:33:54 AM

Mihangel apYrs


a correction:
Moore was beheaded by Henry 8
Cramner was burned (by Mary Tudor) because he wouldn't renounce protestantism.

to the subject:
In a heartbeat I would lie over such a stupid nonsense to save my life. I'd then, in due course, cut the heart out of the person wwho forced me to

6/2/2009 12:39:23 AM

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