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#971841
Freethink
"If the rapture happens,... I am confident that there will be country music in heaven."? And TV too? head desk, head desk, head desk. *facepalm*
Are these people or cartoons? Unbe-friggin'-lievable!!!
6/16/2009 1:11:12 AM
#971843
If the Rapture happens first, I am sure there will be TV sets to watch it on, as they are already filmed.
LOL. Oh why not-- it makes you feel better, which is the entire point of your paranoid delusional Rapture conspiracy theories in the first place.
6/16/2009 1:12:32 AM
#971844
Freethink
"If the rapture happens,... I am confident that there will be country music in heaven."? And TV too? head desk, head desk, head desk. *facepalm*
Are these people or cartoons? Unbe-friggin'-lievable!!!
6/16/2009 1:13:07 AM
#971848
Freethink
Double post somehow. Sorry...
6/16/2009 1:16:25 AM
#971859
rubber chicken
That's it ? The best way of spending eternity that you can think of of sitting in a gold mansion wearing a crown, watching TV and listening to country music. You have the imagination of a housebrick. Your life is vapid and shallow, while this may explain your heartfelt desire for the fulfilment of your 'rapture' faptasies it does not excuse them.
You are wasting your life and then telling people on the internet just how badly you are wasting it.
We are wasting little bits of ours by laughing at you.
6/16/2009 1:49:50 AM
#971861
Deep Search
BRB loling 4ever
6/16/2009 2:05:15 AM
#971889
Mr Blur
Country music in heaven? That figures. Just as well I won't be going.
6/16/2009 3:14:20 AM
#971890
EvoPagan
Yes and I'm sure that Jesus will let me watch season two of True Blood whilst sitting on his lap. Can't fucking wait.
6/16/2009 3:17:02 AM
#971897
Gawd
So, the people who died in, say, 1740 and went to Heaven; were they suddenly "rewarded" with country music and the Disney Channel? That must have been quite a shock.
6/16/2009 3:25:12 AM
#971899
Atheismo
I have a confession to make...
I like country music.
There! I said it! Man, that's a load off my mind. I've been carryin' that around forever.
6/16/2009 3:34:18 AM
#971908
Kristy
Can hardly type. Laughing too much. Tears running down cheeks. WTF??????
6/16/2009 3:49:14 AM
#971913
LDM
If all you would miss is some redneck gathering and a mediocre kid's show, no wonder you're desperately hoping your sky daddy will take you away soon.
6/16/2009 4:09:06 AM
#971921
Pule Thamex
Yes, it's easy. All you got to do is talk silly and act dumb and you're a permanent fixture on Rapture Ready.
The Rapture Ready Song
Happily gabbling away
Nonsensical every day
Talking a load of shit
Getting high on it
We're like little children here
And none of us are queer
We believe what we are told
About the gibberish we've been sold
So it's up, up and away
We're flying today
Flying to our Lord
Let's all get aboard
So it's up, up and away
We're definitely not gay
Flying to our Lord
Let's all get on board
We're ignorant and dull
All of us a dumb numskull
You can tell by our twee emoticon
That we are way, way too far gone
Reality's a land we'll never know
The truth is our main foe
Halo Guy comes charging on a steed
Only then will we be freed
So it's up, up and away
We're flying today
Flying to our Lord
Let's all get aboard
So it's up, up and away
We're definitely not gay
Flying to our Lord
Let's all get on board
Always lying and putting people off
We reside in a dismal trough
A pit of deception and despair
But we won't need any airfare
'Cause we'll be flying for free
Arms outstretched with glee
A we clasp our Saviour's loins
There's a stirring in our groins
I wonder what it can be?
It's a portent of heaven
A portent of heaven
A portent of heaven
Yeah
We're simple, gullible and thick
When it's time we won't be airsick
Jesus is gonna come soon
It'll be just like in a cartoon
Our persecution knows no end
Our paranoia'll never mend
We're right-wing until we die
We'll disparage the other guy
So it's up, up and away
We're flying today
Flying to our Lord
Let's all get aboard
So it's up, up and away
We're definitely not gay
Flying to our Lord
Let's all get on board
So it's up, up and away
We're flying today ... etc, etc
(Continued indefinitely)
6/16/2009 4:34:09 AM
#971926
Mudak
I'm not sure why, but I'm getting giggle fits picturing people trying to play "If My Nose Was Full of Nickels I'd Blow It All On You" on a harp.
6/16/2009 4:39:19 AM
#971931
David B.
This is why I find the whole concept of a heaven absurd; "rimjamama" is confident that heaven includes country and western music, while I can't imagine one that doesn't include some sort of interactive perpetual torment for Garth Brooks.
6/16/2009 4:46:18 AM
#971943
The Jamo
So what you're saying is that if you're in heaven, you'll be listening to country music and watching TV. How is that any different to what you're doing now? Essentially, heaven will be the same thing as Earth for you, and yet you get so freakin' excited.
6/16/2009 5:10:19 AM
#971944
Porky Pine
Why does it not surprise me that you are a country music fan?
6/16/2009 5:11:05 AM
#971947
Xotan
Sorry. If you get whooshed there will be in heaven
No Nashville
No country music - only hymns, forever!
No Fan Fairs (what are these???)
No films/TV, only Jesus and God to worship endlessly - It'll be like being in church all the time.
There will be lots of Angel feathers to dust and hoover all the time, though.
6/16/2009 5:13:22 AM
#971956
David B.
@Xotan: "There will be lots of Angel feathers to dust and hoover all the time, though."
They have "angel dust" in heaven? Well, I guess it would explain God's mood swings!
6/16/2009 5:32:15 AM
#971957
Eden
You won´t have any time for country music or TV after rapture.
God wants you to praise him every minute of his time and to be always ready to fulfill any wishes he has
;)
6/16/2009 5:32:27 AM
#971969
Tindalos
Well, I happen to like C&W music - not all of us are Raptards.
@SwedishPagan:
No friends or family she'll miss? Birdsong? The wind in the willows? Children's laughter? Her work helping the poor, easing the life of those less fortunate?
No, she'll miss a music festival and a TV show. Could you be more shallow?
I was wondering the same damn thing
6/16/2009 5:47:11 AM
#971971
Mister Spak
Does heaven have cable or satellite?
6/16/2009 5:49:12 AM
#971975
MDB
I'll grant that this beats the fundie near-orgasmic idea that "I'm gonna be married to Jesus!" stuff you see occasionally on RR.
This guy just has a rather juvenile idea of paradise. The marriage stuff is... disturbing.
6/16/2009 5:50:20 AM
#971987
Shann
6/16/2009 6:25:36 AM
#972005
"Due to the financial issues I had to forgo a trip to Nashville for the country music Fan Fair, which I attend every year. I am devastated."
As far as I'm concerned, country music starts & finishes with Johnny Cash. Everything else is crap. Which reminds me of that 'challenge' in that edition of BBC's "Top Gear" (the Florida-Louisiana road trip), and messrs Clarkson, May & Hammond daub each other's vehicles with... 'inappropriate' slogans: 'Man-Love Rules OK', a 'Y' at the end of 'Dodge', 'I'm Bi', 'Hillary for President', 'NASCAR Sucks' - and above all, 'Country Music is Rubbish'. The inbred rednecks they encountered & their reactions to such certainly proved the stereotype that most Americans have no concept of irony. That devastates me.
http://www.autoblog.com/2007/02/12/top-gear-crew-visits-u-s-a-will-never-return-again/
"We have a plan to save up for next year, if it works out. If the Rapture happens then I will not get to go."
I think the slogan on the side of this vehicle is very appropriate to you, rjmamula:
6/16/2009 6:48:20 AM
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