Buddy Baker's most recent vision ...
"November 24, 2011 Thursday 9:45 pm, while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere and I hear the Lord say 'MY ANGELS ARE STANDING READY' end."
66 comments
Oh yeah? I was in the shower this morning and realised that Water and Soap are both part of this great thing we call the existence. Nature hath brought us Water; Science hath brought us Soap. Such is the nature of the civilisation's relationship with its environment.
...or something like that.
You weren't in the shower. Stay calm, Buddy, they are nice, kind, helpful professionals. Let them escort you to your room...
What? It's the end of the world again?!
Sheesh! The world has ended so many times these past few years I'm kind of coming down with "armageddon fatigue".
Seriously, NASA could announce they've spotted an asteroid on a collision course with Earth and I'd be like "Asteroid, pfft! If it ain't a rogue planet or stellar core I ain't trembling!"
So one night I as I closed my eyes to drift off to sleep, a good friend of mine was playing his guitar in my bed. Which is more likely, he was there, or my mind was racing off with me?
while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere and I hear the Lord say 'MY ANGELS ARE STANDING READY'
I too see a place that looks like heaven when I finish masturbating in the shower.
If God wanted to send you a message, couldn't he wait until you were out of the shower?
Some of these ultra-religious crazy people see that every time they close their eyes, so this is nothing special.
I was on the toilet the other day and did a big #2. Right after that it smelled unpleasant in the room. IT WAS THE DEVIL! Satan had appeared. I could smell him. I opened the window and a few minutes later Satan had left and taken his stench with him.
That you Jesus. Thou hast delivered me once again from Satan's claws. Amen.
"November 24, 2011 Thursday 9:45 pm, while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere"
(*writes in notebook *)
...then afterwards, you took these 'angels' to your local McDonald's, whereupon you wheeled out a bathtub and all of you proceeded to whip out your 'swords from your hips'. I see...!
http://www.fstdt.net/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=60847&Page=1
"and I hear the Lord say 'MY ANGELS ARE STANDING READY' end."
Must've hurt, having those angels standing on your end , eh? Now tell me about your mother...! X3 [/Freud]
"November 24, 2011 Thursday 9:45 pm, while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere and I hear the Lord say 'Sunday. Aqueduct. Up in Smoke in the 5th'." My angels paid $7.30. What did Buddy's angels do?
I closed my eyes and saw turkey, dressing and gravy, ham, beans, sweet potatoes, pineapple casserole, pecan pie, apple pie, yeast rolls, simmered greens. Then I fell asleep and was thankful we had the leftovers to eat for awhile.
Why are the angels always in white robes? I mean, sure, in artwork it stands for purity, but this ain't art, buddy.
"November 24, 2011 Thursday 9:45 pm, while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere and I hear the Lord say 'MY ANGELS ARE STANDING READY' end."
..Too easy.
"while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere"
Didn't your mother warn you that you'll go blind if you do this kind of thing. Next time you shower wear boxing gloves.
Did you towel down the angels when you all got out of the shower? I hope their feathers were easy to dry.
I think today is 29th November, and still here!
@sandchigger:
"I was going to make a joke about "Buddy Baker" sounding like a made-up comic book name. Then I remembered that it is, Buddy Baker is DC comics Animal Man. And the craziest that book ever got was nowhere *near* this level of batshittery."
I dunno about that... I mean, Animal Man was written by Grant Morrison himself when he was at his best/most gloriously insane. The Buddy Baker quoted here, on the other hand, has very bland, generic and unimaginative hallucinations.
@Alencon :
"@Meishayuri
You have a cat named Jesus? Cool."
Yeah, but for maximum lulz call your dog Jesus: "Jesus, heel!" :P
@ Adrian
@ Alencon
"@Meishayuri
You have a cat named Jesus? Cool."
Yeah, but for maximum lulz call your dog Jesus: "Jesus, heel!" :P
my neighbor has a cat named "Goddamnit".
"Come in here, Goddamnit!"
I don't think he minds because I hear it a lot.
Buddy Baker happens to be the name of a comic book character. And yet somehow, even though the fictional buddy baker exists in a superhero comic universe, his day-to-day exploits make way more sense and are a lot more believable than this guy's hallucination
November 24, 2011 Thursday 9:45 pm, while I was in the shower the moment I closed my eyes I see multitudes of angels in white robes everywhere and I hear the Lord say 'MY ANGELS ARE STANDING READY'
Keep going. I'm actually getting slightly aroused...
And it's fundies who think we're sex-obsessed, and say that touching yourself at night is bad...?
No, fundies, you are the mucky-minded little filthhounds.
And then Bud was a sex-addict.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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