The Lord has told me in a Word of Knowledge that He will strike you down if you do not cease posting here.
87 comments
Oh yeah? Goddess and forces of the land shall protect me from your rants! ...and my blog's nifty anti-spam features probably have a thing or two to do with that.
(Pagans are allowed to be practical. =)
"The Lord has told me in a Word of Knowledge that He will strike you down if you do not cease posting here."
Joan of Arc used to hear the word of the Lord too - and look what happened to her? In Victorian times, those who heard voices in their heads were put away in Bedlam. These days, voices in the head is known as Schizophrenia. And like them, you should be put away in the funny farm.
"The Lord has told me in a Word of Knowledge that He will strike you down if you do not cease posting here."
Nobody panic! My invisible friend said Garvan's invisible friend was just a figment of his imagination and that it was completely safe to continue posting there.
Whew! Catastrophe averted!
A comment like this would have guaranteed that I would have posted MORE and not less. Being struck down by god himself must be really cool, who wouldn't want to be?
Let us know, Garavanuts, when it happens and someone, please! Post the pictures!
The Lord has told me in a Word of Knowledge that He will strike you down if you do not cease posting here.
He's already hit me with Bipolar Disorder, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, and Diabetes. I wish He'd just go ahead and break out the thunderbolts because, quite frankly, I don't want to go on living if I can't have chocolate cake.
LOL, many so-called "prophets" have mades similar claims against those who disagreed with them, and none of them came to pass. Because, quite simply, there is no god. The fact that it's coming from good 'ol Garvan makes it that much funnier.
@ Beeblebrox remember what we've learned from Ministering Deliverance: You are possessed of demons, it is not god's doing.
(Wasn't there even a direct posting of a demon named Diabetes, or possibly spelled wrong, but the intent was there?) Oh, and my whole family is type II, try searching for chocolate cake with canned pumpkin, adds fiber to help balance the bad carbs, tastes like a fudgey mess. Yum!
Fruitcake, nutcase, dingbat, lunatic.
It's all in your deranged mind, Garv! Another Koresh in the making! This sort of religion is really criminal.
God uses WK to talk to Garv, I'm guessing it's a lot like IM-ing him.
<Thunderclap!!!> "Garrr-vannnnnn -- you've got Doubleyou Kayyyyyyyy."
Sure, whay not?
TAKE YOUR MEDS!
even more pathetic then the usual Internet Tough Guy, at least your usual Internet Tough Guy has the guts to threaten to kill people personally, this guy just threatens people with the wrath of his imaginary friend.
You only have to change two letters to go from "Garvan Ellison", Poe-tastic fundie troll, to a certain other individual who happens to have spent decades building a reputation as an obnoxious phallocrat (if a decidedly anti-fundie one). What's up with some of these names?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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