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Mark Bradshaw #fundie disqus.com

(Excerpts of a conversation in progress - some content removed because context can’t be provided)

“No, because rapists and murderers are not consenting, they're abusing others. Once again, you do not understand informed consent.” ----- I do understand what informed consent it. But you still haven’t cited why informed consent makes behavior moral or not.

“No, because you do not understand the concept of consent.” ---- I do. And a child can provide consent. Your hang-up is “legal” consent. If the legal system has no definition of age required for consent, is having relations with an 8 year old moral or immoral? And why?

“You fail to understand the difference between consent and abuse.” ----- You’ve shown NO connection between the two. You’ve FAILED to show why a child cannot give consent – other than “It’s the law”. So, I ask again, since slavery was legal, is slavery moral?

“If they find nothing wrong with rape or murder, yes their morals are wrong.” ----- HOW can you make this claim that their morals are wrong?

“All right, go ahead and abuse a child.” ----- Again, HOW is it abuse if (the child) consents?

“Says the law. Age of consent laws exist for a reason.” ----- So, the law is the arbiter of what is/isn’t moral? I guess slavery was moral, right? What about countries/societies that don’t have laws regarding age of consent – are relations with children moral in those instances?

“And you have elected to believe your denomination is right and the rest are wrong.” ----- Not “the rest” – just those who reject God and His word. But the same could be said of YOU, right? You reject anyone that doesn’t believe the same way you do. How is that any different than what you accuse me of doing?

“- No, I'm asserting that you have what everyone else has - an interpretation, which means you're just as wrong as everyone else and no one can agree about things because you're all so sure you've chosen the 100% correct understanding.” ----- Upon WHAT AUTHORITY can you claim that I am wrong? How can YOU be sure that YOU’VE CHOSEN the “correct” morals? You cannot even cite an authoritative source for those morals.

“You're trying to give it the answer you want, but you can't do that.” ---- I am using how words are defined.

“People don't commit murder because they believe it's acceptable...come on. They do it out of desperation in their situation and because they no longer care and have lost the ability to reason.” ----- So, now you are a psychologist and can claim to know the motivations of every murderer?

“I love the way you think any two people on earth can just make the decision to copulate and it's going to work out peachy.” ----- When did I ever assert that any behavior will “work out peachy”? Why do you insist on asserting that I’ve said things I haven’t actually said?

“Desires you feel you have the right to tell people to squash because of your religion.” ----- FALSE. All that I’ve simply stated is that homosexual behavior is immoral. People “squash” emotions and desires all of the time.

“Not confused at all. I never said our parents got everything right.” ----- Yet you DID say that you learn your morals from your parents – that your parents are your moral authority.

“We get older and our brains develop and we learn for ourselves what good morals are.” ----- “Good” based upon WHAT? You are essentially saying that YOU are your own moral authority. If someone’s morals allow for murder or rape, is that acceptable? If not, then upon WHAT AUTHORITY can one assert something is good/bad, moral/immoral?

“that as we learn to think for ourselves that we don't need a holy book to tell us what's right and wrong.” ---- Upon WHAT BASIS can you determine something to be right or wrong, moral or immoral? You haven’t answered that simple question. You keep going on and on about “learning what is right and wrong”, yet have NEVER cited a source for what is right and wrong. If someone grows up learning that murder and rape are moral, how can you say that murder and rape aren’t moral?

“This is the last time I'm going to humor you on this subject since you don't know and have no desire to know the difference between consent and abuse.” ----- Again, you continue to FAIL to cite an authoritative source for why abuse is wrong, or where not providing legal consent is a qualifier of abuse. You have FAILED to show why, in a society where there is no law regarding age of consent, it is immoral to have relations with a child who has consented.

“We take rapists and murderers out of circulation when they engage in this behavior because it's abuse and it's illegal.” ----- But WHY are those acts immoral? Why are “abuse” and “illegal behavior” immoral? WHAT AUTHORITY asserts that these acts are immoral?

“We don't do the same with homosexuals because they decide to engage in a sexual act because it's not abuse. No one gets hurt.” ----- Whether one gets hurt or not doesn’t determine morality.

“Yes. Age of consent laws aren't absolutely perfect and no two countries draw the lines in the same places, but they do the best they can.” ----- So, if a country/society define no legal age limits on consent, having relations with a 6 year old is acceptable/moral?

“The 20 year old man goes to jail. Quite rightly.” ---- What about in countries that don’t have any limits on age of consent? Is that 20 year old man having relations with a 6 year old girl moral or immoral?

Peter Thiel #fundie cato-unbound.org

I remain committed to the faith of my teenage years: to authentic human freedom as a precondition for the highest good. I stand against confiscatory taxes, totalitarian collectives, and the ideology of the inevitability of the death of every individual. For all these reasons, I still call myself “libertarian.”

But I must confess that over the last two decades, I have changed radically on the question of how to achieve these goals. Most importantly, I no longer believe that freedom and democracy are compatible. By tracing out the development of my thinking, I hope to frame some of the challenges faced by all classical liberals today.

As a Stanford undergraduate studying philosophy in the late 1980s, I naturally was drawn to the give-and-take of debate and the desire to bring about freedom through political means. I started a student newspaper to challenge the prevailing campus orthodoxies; we scored some limited victories, most notably in undoing speech codes instituted by the university. But in a broader sense we did not achieve all that much for all the effort expended. Much of it felt like trench warfare on the Western Front in World War I; there was a lot of carnage, but we did not move the center of the debate. In hindsight, we were preaching mainly to the choir — even if this had the important side benefit of convincing the choir’s members to continue singing for the rest of their lives.

As a young lawyer and trader in Manhattan in the 1990s, I began to understand why so many become disillusioned after college. The world appears too big a place. Rather than fight the relentless indifference of the universe, many of my saner peers retreated to tending their small gardens. The higher one’s IQ, the more pessimistic one became about free-market politics — capitalism simply is not that popular with the crowd. Among the smartest conservatives, this pessimism often manifested in heroic drinking; the smartest libertarians, by contrast, had fewer hang-ups about positive law and escaped not only to alcohol but beyond it.

As one fast-forwards to 2009, the prospects for a libertarian politics appear grim indeed. Exhibit A is a financial crisis caused by too much debt and leverage, facilitated by a government that insured against all sorts of moral hazards — and we know that the response to this crisis involves way more debt and leverage, and way more government. Those who have argued for free markets have been screaming into a hurricane. The events of recent months shatter any remaining hopes of politically minded libertarians. For those of us who are libertarian in 2009, our education culminates with the knowledge that the broader education of the body politic has become a fool’s errand.

Indeed, even more pessimistically, the trend has been going the wrong way for a long time. To return to finance, the last economic depression in the United States that did not result in massive government intervention was the collapse of 1920–21. It was sharp but short, and entailed the sort of Schumpeterian “creative destruction” that could lead to a real boom. The decade that followed — the roaring 1920s — was so strong that historians have forgotten the depression that started it. The 1920s were the last decade in American history during which one could be genuinely optimistic about politics. Since 1920, the vast increase in welfare beneficiaries and the extension of the franchise to women — two constituencies that are notoriously tough for libertarians — have rendered the notion of “capitalist democracy” into an oxymoron.

In the face of these realities, one would despair if one limited one’s horizon to the world of politics. I do not despair because I no longer believe that politics encompasses all possible futures of our world. In our time, the great task for libertarians is to find an escape from politics in all its forms — from the totalitarian and fundamentalist catastrophes to the unthinking demos that guides so-called “social democracy.”

The critical question then becomes one of means, of how to escape not via politics but beyond it. Because there are no truly free places left in our world, I suspect that the mode for escape must involve some sort of new and hitherto untried process that leads us to some undiscovered country; and for this reason I have focused my efforts on new technologies that may create a new space for freedom. Let me briefly speak to three such technological frontiers:

(1) Cyberspace. As an entrepreneur and investor, I have focused my efforts on the Internet. In the late 1990s, the founding vision of PayPal centered on the creation of a new world currency, free from all government control and dilution — the end of monetary sovereignty, as it were. In the 2000s, companies like Facebook create the space for new modes of dissent and new ways to form communities not bounded by historical nation-states. By starting a new Internet business, an entrepreneur may create a new world. The hope of the Internet is that these new worlds will impact and force change on the existing social and political order. The limitation of the Internet is that these new worlds are virtual and that any escape may be more imaginary than real. The open question, which will not be resolved for many years, centers on which of these accounts of the Internet proves true.

(2) Outer space. Because the vast reaches of outer space represent a limitless frontier, they also represent a limitless possibility for escape from world politics. But the final frontier still has a barrier to entry: Rocket technologies have seen only modest advances since the 1960s, so that outer space still remains almost impossibly far away. We must redouble the efforts to commercialize space, but we also must be realistic about the time horizons involved. The libertarian future of classic science fiction, à la Heinlein, will not happen before the second half of the 21st century.

(3) Seasteading. Between cyberspace and outer space lies the possibility of settling the oceans. To my mind, the questions about whether people will live there (answer: enough will) are secondary to the questions about whether seasteading technology is imminent. From my vantage point, the technology involved is more tentative than the Internet, but much more realistic than space travel. We may have reached the stage at which it is economically feasible, or where it soon will be feasible. It is a realistic risk, and for this reason I eagerly support this initiative.

The future of technology is not pre-determined, and we must resist the temptation of technological utopianism — the notion that technology has a momentum or will of its own, that it will guarantee a more free future, and therefore that we can ignore the terrible arc of the political in our world.

A better metaphor is that we are in a deadly race between politics and technology. The future will be much better or much worse, but the question of the future remains very open indeed. We do not know exactly how close this race is, but I suspect that it may be very close, even down to the wire. Unlike the world of politics, in the world of technology the choices of individuals may still be paramount. The fate of our world may depend on the effort of a single person who builds or propagates the machinery of freedom that makes the world safe for capitalism.

For this reason, all of us must wish Patri Friedman the very best in his extraordinary experiment.

(Emphasis added)

Rom831 #fundie rr-bb.com

[On the third-world tribesmen going to hell paradox] I have a friend that is agnostic. Her big hang-up is her cats. What happens to her cats when they die if God is real? She believes that if God is real, her cats either vanish or go to hell because they don’t accept Jesus. So she chooses to not believe in God because she can’t believe in a god that would do this (although I have explained where this isn’t necessarily the case). It absolutely dumbfounds me where some people are so worried about outside things like their cats, or this native in the wilderness, that they would choose an eternity in hell for it.

anonymous #conspiracy news.yahoo.com

A man who found six children in his driveway in Newtown, Conn., after their teacher had been shot and killed in last month's school massacre has become the target of conspiracy theorists who believe the shootings were staged.

“I don’t know what to do,” Gene Rosen told Salon.com. “I’m getting hang-up calls, I’m getting some calls, I’m getting emails with, not direct threats, but accusations that I’m lying, that I’m a crisis actor, ‘How much am I being paid?'”

Rosen, a 69-year-old retired psychologist who lives near Sandy Hook Elementary School where the shootings took place, says his inbox is filled with emails like this one:

How are all those little students doing? You know, the ones that showed up at your house after the ‘shooting’. What is the going rate for getting involved in a gov’t sponsored hoax anyway?

“The quantity of the material is overwhelming,” Rosen said, adding that he's sought the advice of a retired state police officer and plans to alert the FBI.

On the morning of Dec. 14, Rosen had just finished feeding his cats when he saw six small children "sitting in a neat semicircle" at the end of his driveway. According to the Associated Press:

A school bus driver was standing over them, telling them things would be all right. It was about 9:30 a.m., and the children, he discovered, had just run from the school to escape a gunman.

"We can't go back to school," one little boy told Rosen. "Our teacher is dead."

Adam Lanza, the 20-year-old gunman, had shot his way into the school and opened fire, killing 20 children and six adults.

Rosen took the four girls and two boys—students of slain teacher Victoria Soto—into his home, gave them toys and comforted them while he tried to reach their parents. He spent the days following the massacre telling his story to the swarming media that invaded the small Connecticut town in the wake of the shootings.

“I wanted to speak about the bravery of the children,” Rosen told Salon. “I guess I kind of opened myself up to this.”

A quick Web search for Rosen's name reveals some of what he's opened himself up to: Appearing online are photos of his home, his address and phone number, several fake YouTube accounts and plenty of conspiracy theories.

One post, entitled "Grieving Town Grandfather, or Bad 'Crisis Actor,'" reads in part:

Gene's oft repeated, and changing, story about that day, focuses totally on the kids and the sound of gunshots. Even though his eyes and ears should've taken in the whole scene, his story focuses completely on the kids and the guns.

Why? Well, if this was a false flag event designed to move political opinion on gun control, here in America, then you would get a lot more bang for your buck by talking about the innocent little children. That's what tugs on America's heart strings the most ... especially around Christmas time.

theantifeminist #fundie theantifeminist.com

Jessica Alba laments publically that she no longer can attract the attention of subhuman paedophiles men, because she no longer has the childish perfect body of a 14 year old girl.

She is one of the most petite actresses in Hollywood, famed for her toned physique.

But size 6 Jessica Alba, 32, is on a mission to convince the world she is just like the rest of us as she claims to suffer a multitude of body hang-ups including stretch marks, cellulite and a muffin top.

‘Let’s face it, I don’t have the body of a 14-year-old anymore,’ said Alba. ‘I think the more we try not to have that unrealistic ideal, the happier we’ll be.’

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2383392/Jessica-Alba-size-6-says-I-cellulite-stretchmarks–muffin-interview-Womens-Health.html
This in the Daily Mail. I’m sure if you can stomach reading through today’s edition, you’ll probably find a story of a sick pervert being rightly sentenced to years of ass rape for being caught looking at pictures of 14 year old girls in bikinis.

And hey manosphere dudes, why is Jessica Alba complaining of not having a 14 year old girl’s body, when we’ve all read on wikipedia that females hit peak sexual fertility at 21-23?

Me no get it.

And why would any liberal progressive readers degrade themselves by considering my crude supposition that adult women, who are motivated in nearly everything they do primarily by the desire to sexually attract men, and who spend half their adult lives and adult income trying to do so, might use feminism as a means to block men from seeking out females who they are naturally inclined to sexually prefer (i.e. 14 year old girls)?

Me no get human stupidity.

Roosh Valizadeh #sexist archive.fo

All That’s Left For Normal Men Are Rotten Women

Nature has given humanity a roughly one-to-one ratio of adult men to women, but the most attractive women are being taken out of circulation to either join alpha male harems or participate in degenerate lifestyle choices. This leaves the average man practically no choice in settling down with a mentally stable and cute woman in her prime.

In Islam, a man is able to marry four wives, which is what my wealthy Iranian grandfather did on his way to siring 24 or so children that included my dad (the exact number is a mystery). He took away three women that an Iranian man of lesser means could have married, creating a societal imbalance, but that’s nothing compared to what we have in the modern Western world, where a single famous man can command the sexual attentions of dozens—if not thousands—of women in their sexual prime, spoiling these women for normal men who don’t have the ability to tingle their vaginas with the same intensity.

How many actors, musicians, and sports athletes are trying to plow through as much prime pussy as possible? How many Hollywood directors and music producers are leveraging their positions for sexual gain? How many club owners, restaurateurs, Arab sheikhs, and politicians are doing the same? Each one is taking way more beautiful women out of circulation than men like my grandfather, all while elevating their standards to such an extent that no average man can ever gain their love, let alone two hours—or even two minutes–of their uninterrupted attention.

We also have to account for female lifestyle choices that are designed to delay or prevent pair bonding and marriage. The biggest is career. Most girls, while embarking on a career, balance out the boredom of working a meaningless job by hopping on the cock carousel and banging at least a few men every year. By the time a girl hits 25 years old, any man who meets her will have to deal with a walk-in closet of emotional issues and hang-ups from being pumped and dumped as much as a 1930’s brothel whore.

Then there is the Instagram and Facebook lifestyle that creates crippling dopamine addiction, which causes a girl to only be satisfied if dozens of men are actively thirsting for her every day. I estimate that if a girl has over 500 followers on Instagram, she is so used to attention from throngs of men that the love of one man cannot possibly satisfy her.
We must also throw in the growing “travel blogger” lifestyle where, instead of using only her body to get attention, a girl uses pictures and video from exotic locations to enhance her beauty. Other girls, with nothing substantial to offer the world, decide to showcase pictures of pets or their tasty overpriced meals, but even that puts them on a dopamine loop that ruins their future interactions with men.

By far, the most damaging lifestyle choice women make is becoming a sugar baby, a politically correct term for “prostitute.” For some easy cash, she whores out her body to the highest bidder (some women combine Instagram and prostitution in a seamless package). How can such an Instagram prostitute ever settle down with a man who has a normal salary? There are also the hundreds of women who enter porn every year, some from seemingly stable families. Sadly, men are so desperate for love that many would wife up a former prostitute or porn star, but it’s highly unlikely those women will make for stable families.

The Western world is a sinkhole for women. The prettiest of the bunch fall into the hole and get spit out years later an entitled #MeToo hag who can never be happy, making the Islamic four-wive rule seem downright egalitarian. The sad truth is that if you meet an attractive girl today, she was pumped and dumped by numerous sexy men, prefers to nurture her career than children, is addicted to attention via the internet, and has participated in some kind of scheme to exchange social status or cash for her pussy. She’s more than suitable for a bit of fun, but would it be wise to seek a relationship with her?

Even with the obesity and short-hair epidemic, I still see a bountiful supply of cute girls I would happily reproduce with. I would love them, let them caress my beard, and lay my seed deep within their vaginal guts, but the problem is that those guts are not for me—they are for the Chads who would never marry her, the beta orbiters who await her newest selfie as if it were a source of food, or the rich and lonely men who would sponsor her for thousands of dollars a month. They’re taking her out of circulation at the time I want her most, and by the time they are done with her, I no longer want her. I guess I’ll try to weasel in a bang or two when she is not yet fully degraded, and enjoy the fleeting pleasure that comes from it as much as I can.

Darwin's Myth #fundie blogs.myspace.com

First, evolution is when one kind of creature becomes a totally different kind of creature, such as a lizard evolving into a bird, or a cow evolving into a whale. But, this has never been observed, tested, or verified. For over 60 years, evolutionists have tried to prove that fruit flies can evolve into some other creature by purposely causing mutations in the flies, but failed. Mutations have never created new organs or new creatures.
Evolutionists are desperate for evolution to be true it seems, because since we don't actually see evolution happening, they'll use the changes (variations/adaptations) within kinds, which are called species, as proof of evolution. An example of this type of change are changes within the dog kind, such as wolves, german shepherds, beagles, poodles, etc. They are all still dogs, so therefore not the kind of change that is needed to prove evolution, or macroevolution.

According to evolutionists/scientists, evolution has been going on for billions of years, so where are the living transitionals hiding? Shouldn't there be millions of living, chaotic looking transitionals running around outside today? Also, shouldn't there be living ape-men transitionals, since there are apes still alive today? Transitionals are non-existing, even in the so-called geologic column.

Frank Uriah #fundie groups.google.com

(In response to NYC allowing transgendered people to change their birth certificates:)

So, the New York State Ministry of Information has activated their memory hole to please the trannies and it's supposed to be a "good" thing.

A "birth certificate" is supposed to reflect information about a person at the time of their birth. If some nutcase later claims to be trapped in the wrong time stream, galaxy or gender that does not make it OK to change their vital records to reflect their delusion.

I wonder when terrorism fetishists will begin demanding the right to carry bombs everywhere they go. After all, we have to cater to everyone's sexual hang-ups no matter how disruptive to the existing system they might be.

("bobandcarole" responded: "Shemales, faggots that don't know who they are......")

Hatemail Senders #sexist thesocietypages.org

You don’t know me, but you likely know of me. I’m the female professor who dared to run a self-esteem study requesting photographic evidence confirming correct method and measure of penis size.

Within a week of launch, a website called The College Fix ran a misleading story written by a college freshman describing my study. Oh, and they gave it an inflammatory click-bait headline.

In less than 24 hours, national and international news outlets picked up the story. Most just ran the original story—headline and all—without confirming its claims. One source even added in some new, provocative inaccuracies, claiming I wanted my students to send me “dick pics.” Minimum age to participate was 22 years old, and I did no local or university recruitment. However, even the accurate coverage chose headlines suggesting I wanted “dick pics” “sent” to me; so men across the country sent me selfies via email. (The study requested pictures showing a specific method of measure submitted only through the survey portal.) Other people jumped to assumptions about my motives and purposes without even reading any of my previous work or learning much about the actual study.

As soon as the first story appeared, my inbox overflowed. I fielded 500 emails daily. Most of the emails were supportive and from wanna-be participants. However, many messages were hate mail. Each hater sent multiple emails. The first message came from a Michigan man (he went to my academia.edu page, which provided his location)—he opened his email by calling me a “feral whore.” He sent 30 emails in total, each with similarly abusive language. He called me a “fat pig,” or some variation, in most of those emails. He even claimed that I was “so fat only N—–s would” have sex with me. The racism of misogyny was common.

I reported this hate mail to campus IT Security, who sent me instructions on blocking the emails. This only sent them to junk mail, though, which I had to check regularly for potential participant emails.

Another guy sent 15, very long emails the first day. He denigrated my training—both where I trained and the fact that my degrees are all in different fields (common among sociologists)—and he told me this was a stupid mistake for someone “starting her career.” I’m three years into my assistant professor position.

All of the men who sent abusive emails swore to contact Missouri State University administrators and state legislators to demand they fire me. I’m a sex researcher, and accustomed to upset with my work. However, the level of vitriol from each hater far exceeded my previous experiences.

The phone rang all day. I took it off the hook. Day one there were 19 messages. Most were hang-ups. The rest were either prank calls or abusive in their tone and accusations. One woman left a several minute message letting me know I am “disgusting.”

Although haters were generally unique in their responses, a common frustration among those sending hate was that I am a woman. Many literally wrote, “How dare you, a female professor, run a study like this.” Keep in mind, these pictures were clinical pictures, think medical textbook not titillating Playgirl images. When I responded with, “Why would you feel differently if I were a man?” I got no response. Another shared trait: they were all upset that I would suggest smaller men might feel badly about themselves, and assumed my purpose was to prove that correlation.

There is ample data demonstrating that for many men who perceive their penises are small, self-esteem is indeed an issue. How our bodies look and how we see them impacts how we feel about ourselves, and this is an important social and psychological issue. My study could have contributed to this existing body of knowledge that takes men’s bodies and feelings seriously, and it could have perhaps helped to shift methodology for penis size studies. Yet I had to cancel the study a week and a half into recruitment because we live in a world where the idea of a woman looking at “dick pics” is just too upsetting for people to permit. Important work about men and masculinity had to be shut down because of massive media misrepresentation and widespread sexist attitudes. That’s a loss for us all. I’ll go on with other studies. The news cycle will shift. But the hundreds of men who begged me not to close this study are still living with self-esteem issues due to perceived penis size. And no one is talking to them about it.

Ellen Lacter #conspiracy endritualabuse.org

Installation of mind control programming relies on the capacity to dissociate, which permits the creation of new walled-off personalities to “hold” and “hide” programming. Already dissociative children are prime “candidates” for programming. Alternatively, very young children may be made dissociative by trauma-based programming. The extreme abuse inflicted on young children in intra-familial satanic and abusive witchcraft cults reliably causes dissociation. Children in these cults are programmed to the extent that the cult’s leaders understand mind control programming.

Organized and sophisticated abuser groups with world-power or organized crime agendas infiltrate these cults to gain access to these readily-programmable children. In exchange for the privilege of being allowed to install self-serving programs in these children, the organized abuser group provides the cult parent with a large fee (thousands of dollars), favor, or information, such as some of its programming secrets.

Simple to Moderately Complex Programming

1. Psychic driving (Film, “The Sleep Room”, about CIA funding of Ewen Cameron, MD in the 1950s)

2. Unidimensional edicts communicated during severe abuse, convincing the affected personalities that the abuse will re-occur if the programmed mandate is broken. The most common simple programs are commands to never remember (re-associate into consciousness) the abuse and never disclose the abuse.

3. Pronouncements; claims, curses, covenants, etc., paired with abuse, that convince personalities they are controlled by evil entities, or forever malevolently defined as., e.g., forever evil, physically or mentally ill, socially devalued and isolated, sexually enslaved, a murderer, a cult member, a witch, etc.

4. Examples of process: “The first five steps of discipline” Svali, 1999, see http://www.centrexnews.com/columnists/svali/2000/11/chapter04.html

Moderately to Very Complex Programming

It has been my unfortunate experience to have been forced to conclude that sophisticated abuser groups within the United States of America are using torture to install complex mind control programming in our children in order to further their own political or religious agendas (See Hersha, L; Hersha, C., Griffis, D., & Schwarz, T. (2001) Secret weapons: Two sister’s terrifying true story of sex, spies, and sabotage. Far Hills, New Jersey: New Horizon Press, and Ross, C.A. (2000) Bluebird: Deliberate creation of multiple personality by psychiatrists. Richardson Texas: Manitou Communications).

This involves:

1. Torture involving states of extreme pain and terror, to the point of near-death, is required to install mind control programming. These states are induced through electroshock, toxins that cause pain or temporary paralysis, assault, painful bondage or pressure, rape,, extreme cold (submersion in ice water is common), heat, burning suffocation, near-drowning, spinning, hanging, inversion, exposure to torture, mutilation, or murder of others, and/or prolonged isolation, starvation, dehydration, or sensory deprivation.

States of despair, self-hatred, paranoia, and global distrust of humanity, are also effective. These are induced through forcing the child to hurt or kill others, often loved ones and pets, sexual humiliation, convincing the child that all important attachment figures are abusers, and convincing the child that he or she is now controlled and overseen by surgically implanted monitoring devices or “spiritual assignments” of demons, malevolent spirits, curses, hexes, vexes, claims, etc.

2. Children must be very young in order for mind control programming to be initially installed, under 4 or 5 years of age. Modifications to the original programming can be made later.

3. One of the central functions of most mind control programs is to cause the victim to physically and psychologically re-experience the torture used to install the programming should she or he act in violation of the programmed commands. The re-experience of the original torture often includes somatic manifestation of the original injuries, such as bruising and swelling, though not to the degree of the original injury.

4. The most complex programs consist of personalities buried deep in the unconscious mind perceiving themselves, visually (in images) and somatically (in experiences of pain, suffocation, electroshock, etc.), to be attached to, or trapped within, “structures”, such as buildings, devices of torture, machines, containers, etc. These structures serve as containers for the programmed commands, messages, and information.

5. Mind control continues to control the victim’s thoughts and actions for decades, often for life, with no conscious awareness of the programming or of the personalities under its control, usually completing programmed actions unconsciously, sometimes feeling only a conscious compulsion to do, or not do, something. Survivors of organized abuse who re-associate their history of abuse usual begin to recover their memories between 30 and 50 years of age. It generally takes many more years for the survivor to become aware of the mind control programming and it’s ongoing effects on her or him.

6. The commands and structures installed during torture, and the detailed recollection of the torture itself, remain amazingly stable and fixed over time, from the toddler years until at least middle age, with incredibly little deterioration of memory (stored information) over time. The “memory capacity” in the programmed unconscious mind is enormous, holding vast amounts of detailed information, including lengthy “strings” of encoded information, that could never be stored in conscious awareness.

7. Program “triggers”, “cues”, and “access codes” easily allow the programmer to regain access to the programmed personalities or program “structures” to install or change commands, messages, and information, and to retrieve information, all out of the victims’ awareness.

8. Programming overrides the victim’s free will and beliefs. Programmed people follow commands and perform actions that are in clear violation of their free will, moral principles, and spiritual convictions.

9. Programmers gain access to victims of other groups and deliberately “program over” competitor group’s programming to dominate the behavior of the person

10. Such programming exists in an alarming number of people

11. Attempting to remove or disable it without great expertise “sets off” programmed self-destruction and negative health/mental health consequences, all by the programmers’ intentions.

It is the responsibility of all clinicians working with highly dissociative and ritually abused people to research this topic and proceed with extreme caution.

Some Indicators of Mind Control Programming (see a more extensive list on this website on the page: “Some Indicators of Mind Control Programming”)

A. Repetitive statements that seem robotic, or do not make sense in the context of the dialogue.

B. Compulsive or ritualized behaviors, especially self-mutilation, singing the same song

C. Fearful reactions to benign stimuli, such as colors, shapes, cartoon characters, lights, brands of food.

D. Telephone reactions; e.g., strong startle response to phone ringing, many hang-up calls to the home, a compulsion to make calls (often toll-free), finding the phone in his/her hand in early am hours.

E. Severe flinching and spasms (as if being electro-shocked) when approaching trauma material.

Tal Hartsfeld #fundie eivindberge.blogspot.hr

There must be some kind of "collective amnesia syndrome" concerning the long-range memory of most people, because I have no trouble remembering the sexual desires I had for select female classmates as far back as 3rd grade (and beyond).
And some of those desires were a bit fornicative in nature as well.

And, no, they were not caused by any "acts of molestation" by any adults in my life. In fact, if anything, I kept my thoughts and fantasies a secret from, especially, my parents and other relatives. And never shared them with any classmates either. I already figured out they were a bit of an "oddity" on my part as no-one else seemed to have any of the kinds of hang-ups that were the norm for me. My desires and fantasies were purely of my own making---stuff I came up with.
I'm quite convinced that if the people in my life knew half of what I was visualizing in my mind at the time they would have been quite shocked.
Oddly enough, to this day, a lot of what would turn me on with a woman is the same things that were turning me on with the girls in my class.

But, on the subject of "childhood innocence", yes the sexual desires start prepubescent. However, due to cultural taboos and the fact that most parents wait until their offspring is "old enough to" understand certain select "facts of life", there is still that overall naivety children have about the subject as they still have no total concept of all the nuances of the subject itself, of just how involved and abstract (in the lascivious sense) the adult versions can get (and let's face it: A lot of adult sex can get WAY OUT THERE).
As such, a child's version, lust-filled as it can be, is still quite tame in comparison, even when mildly perverted. In short: A kid exposed to some of the harsher versions of "adult sex" does stand to suffer a sizable degree of "culture shock". I'm not questioning that.
I'm only stating that a lot of the basic sexual desires don't "wait until" the teenage years to start manifesting themselves mentally, emotionally,and psychologically.
One thing: I was so naive at the time I honestly thought my lust and erotic fantasies were "proof of my 'being in love with'" said classmate (I was only 9 and 10 at the time, so cut me some slack).

IllimitableMan #sexist reddit.com

Men are superior to women and therefore have more responsibilities than women. Women are superior to children, and therefore have more responsibilities than children. Superiority means "leadership over" due to increased maturity and reason, it does not come with a connotation of hate. Women do not hate children because they're superior to them in the same way that men do not hate women because they're superior to them. Although plenty of men have their hang-ups with women (just as the reverse is true.) Men are more mature than women, who are more mature than children. This is about a hierarchy of maturity, of which men are at the top. The less mature you are, the less reasonable you are. You wouldn't want an immature person in charge of you, and assuming you found someone competent, you wouldn't say you were equal to the person in charge of you.

The problem with people today is women have been told it's bad to let a man be in charge of them, and men have been told to treat women as equal partners rather than subordinate dependants they care for. You are superior, and you have to be in order to be eligible. That's reality. For the sake of ego preservation on her part, she will want to think of herself as your "first mate" or "partner", but you're not the captain, you're the ship. Without you there is nothing, no base nor foundation. She relies on you VASTLY more than you rely on her, and any functional relationship between a man and a woman is always based on this model.

It doesn't mean she's not important, it means you're depended upon more than you depend on her. It means the distribution of burden is disproportionate in order to reflect your difference in maturity, your burden is greater because her need is greater, her need is greater because she is more immature, and by extension of being less mature, less competent. In fact, it's dangerous for you to depend on her emotionally, but the reverse is perfectly acceptable and fine. This is the burden that comes with being at the top of the maturity hierarchy. Emotional loneliness. Accepting you cannot confide all your deepest secrets and fears, not unless you're a schmuck who wants to see your relationship fall to shit. Women are so upset they're not really equals that they're completely ignorant to the fact that not being the final person everybody depends on is a privileged position.

That when push comes to shove, women want someone to lean on and someone to blame, that true equality to men is something they could never handle. Like a child who wants to stay up late and eat unlimited amounts of candy, they only see the privileges of being a man, not the burdens. Notice how women always go on about maturity in a way men don't seem to give a fuck about They're like the damn maturity police. This reminds me of little kids who insist they're grown-ups out of insecurity. "Women are equal to men!" touted by women is the same infantile narcissism as a child claiming "I'm not a little kid anymore!". It stems from the desire to be taken seriously by people you're less mature and capable than. This is all ego, remember you will find the truth in action rather than words, for in words they claim equality to man, but in action they demand superiority from him. In relation to the statement "women are children", this is hyperbole, what /u/redpillschool concretely means is "women are childlike" - if they weren't, you wouldn't want them. Feminine charm comes from a certain present-orientation, feminine beauty comes from a lack of ageing.

Women play up innocence and play down their cunning because this is what makes them attractive to men. Innocence is an inherently childlike quality. Men don't try to seem innocent because it's not masculine, things that are childlike are inherently unmasculine, but they aren't unfeminine. Why? Because women are closer to children than men. Stop thinking this is some way of talking women down or some sad attempt at dehumanisation. It isn't. It's a truism regardless of whether it suits your sensibilities. Shrewd women constantly leverage the appearance of innocence to get people to help them. Women pout, men don't. Women have strops, men don't. Women cry more than men. Women are less rational than men. In summary: women are more mature than children, but less mature than men. You can teach a woman to behave well, but she is still a woman and so requires discipline in the same way a child does. She craves it. She will not "be good" because "she's a good woman" she will only "be good" because you convey authority, and in order to convey authority, you must be superior, superior meaning more mature and more competent. This is the natural order of things. Egalitarianism is an indoctrinated ideal, it is normal to you because you grew up brainwashed by feminist garbage, but it is not normal in nature, and it is not indicative of reality.

Women's childlike qualities are not just physical (smaller, less hair etc), but their neonatality is likewise echoed mentally. The hottest women have greater neonatal traits than uglier ones. She's not your psychological equal. You can love her, care for her, even depend on her for small things, but she's not your equal and never will be. As Schopenhauer said, she is somewhere between a child and an adult, an adolescent perhaps. If you can't accept that, if you need to believe in the feminine ego porn that she's your equal in every which way, fine. But that doesn't mean TRP is wrong, it means you're unable to accept an aspect of reality that discomforts you.

Elizabeth Minkel #sexist medium.com

Mary Sue
From self-inserts to imagines, how young women write themselves into the narrative
Illustration by the incredible Maia Kobabe

[This piece was written in conjunction with the most recent episode of the Fansplaining podcast. Follow us on Twitter or Tumblr, and if you’re interested in supporting our work—helping us commission more art and pieces like this—please consider donating to our Patreon.]

1.

Let’s start with the woman in question. She isn’t usually called Mary Sue—she has a less plausible, more fanciful name. Similarly, she has less plausible, more fanciful physical features than your average girl: purple eyes, or really extraordinary hair. You don’t know her, but you know the characters that surround her—she’s a new student at Hogwarts, an important ally you meet in Rivendell, the person on whom Holmes and Watson will rely to crack the case. She is notably smarter, stronger, and/or more beautiful than her peers. She’s going to save the day—and maybe a character you know will fall in love with her, too. She’s a wholly original character, though she might resemble an idealized version of the author. She’s a super-girl, bending beloved stories around her, heroism in a world mostly made up of heroes.

Oh, also: she is the ultimate object of scorn. She is the literal worst. She is embarrassing, self-indulgent trash; she ruins the story with her competence, her desirability, and the way all those characters you love seem to love her. She’s been described an endless number of colorful ways, including (via Fanlore’s meticulous and depressing entry on Mary Sues) the “literary equivalent of publicly soiling yourself.” She is everything that’s wrong with fanfiction, with girls writing stories, with fangirls, period.

The most basic definition of “Mary Sue” is an original female character in fanfiction—which is largely about established characters and worlds—who is often close to perfect. Like, too perfect. Very good at her job, very desirable romantically or sexually, and sometimes very emotionally moving when she dies, tragically, and the other characters mourn her. The story usually centers around her, often warping established characterization in the process. She’s self-indulgent, to be sure, but she’s harmless, and framed this way, one might wonder why young girls writing themselves into their favorite worlds is the literary equivalent of publicly soiling yourself. If you have to wonder that, though, you might not be familiar with the way the world treats young girls.

“Mary Sue” was coined by Paula Smith in 1970s Star Trek fandom, in a very short story that began, “‘Gee, golly gosh, gloriosky,’ thought Mary Sue as she stepped on the bridge of the Enterprise. ‘Here I am, the youngest lieutenant in the Fleet—only 15–1/2 years old.’” Lieutenant Mary Sue, object of affection of Kirk, Spock, and the rest of the men of Star Trek: TOS, was meant to be a parody of what Smith had observed in the fanzines of the day: “The term caught on because she’s very identifiable: Here it is, that same character, and isn’t it a shame because she’s just so tiresome,” she told an interviewer at Transformative Works and Cultures in 2011.

The conversation, conducted 40 years after Lieutenant Mary Sue first stepped onto the bridge, is an interesting one, not least because of the vague sense of disconnect between the literary analysis around the term (why bending a story around your original character might make for bad fiction, or at least not-terribly-enjoyable fiction if you aren’t the author) and the gendered morass that the term has sunk into (or, arguably, where it began).

Mary Sues weren’t born in Trek fandom—one researcher drew parallels between modern self-insert fic and stories that girls wrote about versions of themselves in the nineteenth century—but the term was born in an era of paper zines, a time of limited space for fanfiction, and arguably one with a different relationship between fic writers and their readers. When she first coined the term, Smith says, “In the letter columns, we started seeing the writers react: ‘What’s so wrong with my story? I’m just telling a story that I think is great.’” Even detractors admit Mary Sues are about young girls finding their power and agency in a world of fictional landscapes that rarely afford such journeys to women. After all, the original Mary Sue was the youngest lieutenant in the Fleet.

The days of limited space and resources in fic production are ancient history: there is always room for another story in the internet’s archives, and the general ethos of the broader fanfiction community has long been “don’t like, don’t read.” Many stories are self-indulgent, whether they feature a stand-in for the author or or not. But hatred of Mary Sues is embedded in the culture, self-perpetuating, and has seemingly ramped up since fic came online. In the early digital days, some archives banned Mary Sues outright; to this day, blogs exist solely to call peoples’ original characters Mary Sues, and to deconstruct and mock them accordingly.

Once the seed was planted in cultural discourse, Mary Sue accusations became impossible to stop—the toxicity surrounding the term has spread far beyond fanfiction self-inserts. Not long after it was coined, “Mary Sue” became any original female character in fanfiction; for decades, women have been reporting that they stopped writing original female characters, then female characters altogether, for fear of the “Mary Sue” label. Canonical female characters seen as threats to male/male romances in fic got the term, too—one notable (and incredibly troubling) example is the treatment of Nyota Uhura in fic about the rebooted Star Trek films. And over the years, the term has seeped across pop culture, to the point where “Mary Sue” becomes any female lead, anywhere. Bella Swan, Katniss Everdeen, and Rey from Star Wars are just a few slapped with the label. It’s just so annoying that their respective plots center around them, they must be Mary Sues.

(There are male Mary Sues, in case you’re wondering: “Marty Stu,” “Gary Stu,” and other variations have shown up over the years. People try to counter, even undercut, the inherent misogyny in the Mary Sue conversation by naming too-competent, too-desirable leading men—Captain Kirk, Luke Skywalker, and James Bond are famous examples. There’s an old joke: “What do you call a male Mary Sue?” The answer? “A protagonist.” It’s…not a particularly funny joke.)

But just as fanfiction writers are fighting back against historical scorn towards the practice at large, in recent years fans have been standing up for Mary Sues, too. Critics of the term are working to excise it from discussions around professional works, where it disproportionally targets women writing novels about female characters. In an act of reclamation, one of the most popular female-led geek sites on the internet took the term for its name. And within fan writing communities, people are going to bat for even the most self-indulgent Mary Sues, questioning why we shame young fans for making themselves the heroes of their own stories. But is a long-embedded stigma that easy to shake?

2.

It feels like every other fanfiction writer you talk to has a tale of their own early Mary Sues. Not everyone got called out for them—plenty of people learned to self-censor when they saw others getting shamed. My podcast partner, Flourish, reports that her early original female character was a student who proved vital to a case that Mulder and Scully were investigating. My first fanfic was almost entirely original characters, sketched out on yellow legal pads—I took a minor character from a book series and gave him a diverse team of corporate executives (don’t ask, it’s a weirdly long explanation). But by age 14, when I fell in love with Buffy and learned about online fandom, I was writing stories featuring a banshee who was old friends with Rupert Giles named…Ophelia. (I swear to God, I had no idea about the implications at the time, I just thought “Ophelia” sounded pretty, just as I loved “Cecilia” until Simon & Garfunkel ruined it for me.)

But these days more women are pushing back against the original characters they once felt ashamed of. After all, why shouldn’t young girls write the most spectacular versions of themselves—and why shouldn’t they want to see themselves in a story? In recent years I’ve been especially interested in watching women, people of color, and queer people reclaim the self-insertion narrative from one of indulgence to one of vital representation. In a piece partly about her youthful love of Lord of the Rings, Ash Davis writes,

“Be the change you wish to see,” Gandhi said (sorta). So I wrote my change. I discovered fanfiction and wrote all the damn change. I went into the painfully white fandoms of the things I loved…and wrote black folk into every last one of them. If there were no black people, I made them. If they were tokens, I made them stars. Mary-sued the shit out of everything. It didn’t matter, you were gonna see me!

In another piece I love about reclaiming the Mary Sue (via a medieval mystic, Margery Kempe, who essentially Mary Sued her way into the Bible in her writing, chilling with Mary and romancing Jesus), Ana Wilson writes about placing the female body back into reading—and into writing.

Reading The Book of Margery Kempe alongside fanfiction makes it clear that physical, imaginative reading is still associated with women, still considered embarrassing, and still employed as a form of resistance to mainstream narratives. People, in short, are still using this style of reading to elbow their way into texts from which they are restricted, just as Kempe and other women did with religious texts.

I wish I had my own Mary Sues to claim, but on a personal level, I’m a little more ambivalent. When I talk about good old Ophelia the Banshee, both “female” and an “original character” (and pulling from a very specific strand of symbolic mythology, for that matter), it’s easy to assume that I must have been writing a Mary Sue. But I can’t remember any specific connection between myself and the character, beyond the connections I have with every character I write, from the weary narrator of much of my original fiction who, like me, works at a racetrack, all the way to a certain pansexual immortal time traveling man from the 51st century.

The relationship between a writer and the characters she both reads and writes is a varied and complicated one. Fanfiction adds a layer onto that—the original characters in question aside, most of the people we write about started out as someone else’s characters, at least before the original work went out in the world. In the hands of fans, individually or collectively, a character often becomes someone else in the process. I should clarify: I don’t mean that fans are likely to render them out-of-character. But with the space and care that fanfiction can afford, fan writers often draw a favorite world’s characters as richer, more complicated—more human.

So unless you’re writing self-inserts or original characters, fanfic is partly about getting into the headspace of a character you didn’t create. That, for me anyway, is one of fanfiction’s chief pleasures—I’ve written before that for most fans, fic isn’t about wacky plots, as people outside fandom often assume, but about understanding a character so well that the interesting part comes when you stick them in a wacky plot (sure, “there’s only one hotel room left” counts as wacky), apply pressure, and see how they react.

For me, in my post-Ophelia Banshee days, inhabiting other characters as I write fanfiction has been vitally important. I read and write fic for a simultaneous distance and closeness with these characters—I allow them into my head, but I’m not looking to project myself back onto them. Part of this is privilege: whiteness, and I’m especially thinking of the un-interrogated whiteness of my adolescence, often lets white people assume a “default” position. A disproportionate number of the characters on our pages and screens are white, and from that lens shared whiteness with characters feels less like commonality and more like a lack of difference. Part of it is the opposite of privilege: the minefield of my struggles with gender and sexuality—almost definitely a subject for a totally separate essay—have left me perpetually out of step with many characters I encounter on pages and screens. When I think about myself in relation to a story, I slip away—a bit ironic, I suppose, for someone fascinated by girls who write themselves into stories. Or maybe that’s the whole point.

But part of it’s not just me: I hesitate to get too reductive on the links between shaming girls out of their own stories and the kinds of things that dominate many corners of the fanfiction world, but one could draw a line from the embarrassment of the Mary Sue to the positioning of certain types of characters in fandom as “default.” In the vast landscape of popular media, at least in the Anglo-American context, we’re implicitly taught to view the white male character as neutral, blank, infinitely relatable. While media certainly can shoulder some blame, fans should be held responsible, too, and the way young fans are encouraged, gently or mockingly, to step out of their own perspectives, away from their own backgrounds, and into the perspective of certain types of characters is one of the lasting legacies of the Mary Sue construction.

3.

When we consider the Mary Sue and her position in fandom at large, those of us outside the real person fic space often tend to overlook the fact that as long as celebrity fandom has existed, fannish communities have been built on self-insert fic with female protagonists. For many readers, this kind of story is sought after, not an object of scorn. The self-inserts that populate a lot of boy band RPF, for example, are perspective characters that, just like Mary Sues, allow young women to gain narrative control of their relationships with the objects of their affection.

Perspective is important in fanfic. It’s obviously also important in all other fiction, ever, but fic can sometimes feel particularly preoccupied with it. After all, perspective shift is one of the bedrocks of the practice; fans love nudging the spotlight off a canonical protagonist. RPF is an interesting space to examine perspective, and the way the “default” (white, male) gaze gets shattered and refashioned. There’s the complicated sort of circular gaze of stories from the celebrity’s point of view, where the reader watches the celebrity watching a character who’s often a stand-in for the reader. And while second-person fic feels more prevalent in fanfiction at large than it does in the published fiction world, it often feels ubiquitous in RPF spaces. Lumped under a second-person umbrella stories that work very differently in form and function, from fleshed-out second person narrators to “x Reader” stories that eschew identifying details to “imagines,” short prompts that exist in a murky space between fiction and daydream fodder.

When you place those fleshed-out narrators side-by-side with Mary Sues, it’s an interesting study in contrasts: where a Mary Sue is too-perfect, the self-insert narrator is often fairly ordinary, beaten down in some way, frustrated with her situation, not quite aware of her own attractiveness or agency. (Part of the pleasure of the narrative arc is the realization, and reclamation of that agency.) These characters and this type of fic is wildly popular on Wattpad, so much so that the platform commissioned an entire anthology of second-person RPF entitled IMAGINES, released last year with a shiny silver mirror on its cover alongside the words “Celebrity encounters starring YOU.”

The imagines of the anthology are, a little confusingly, not quite the same thing as “imagines,” the prompts that are increasingly popular on Tumblr and Wattpad. The anthology’s stories, about chance encounters with celebrities, are narrated by women of various ages and backgrounds with clear characterization and perspective. They’re not all romantic: in one story, a mother embarrasses her teenage daughter when she brings home Nicholas Hoult for dinner, the “you” full of maternal affection for the actor; in another, “you” are on the run with Kim Kardashian, a freedom fighter in an America where the government has outlawed selfies (Kim is on the run because she keeps taking them, obviously). The “yous” are unremarkable, but there’s a bit of knowing space between the reader and the narrator: we can tell you’re selling yourself short, and we’re waiting for you to realize it.

Actual imagines, in contrast, leave you to do most of the work of constructing a protagonist. They are short, sometimes a single sentence: “Imagine: You and Ed take a camping trip to get away from the media,” reads one on a popular Tumblr devoted to imagines, accompanied by a gif of Ed Sheeran looking sort of bashful. How you met, the state of your relationship, literally everything about “you” is up in the air—whether the reader even feels compelled to fill those gaps is a matter of preference. The “you” in an imagine isn’t necessarily average-looking or untalented—the same blog offers you a gif of Sebastian Stan looking charmed accompanied by, “Imagine: When Sebastian first meets you he is speechless and stunned by your beauty.” Imagines are interesting often not because of what they contain, but what they lack—the wide-open spaces they leave, utterly customizable, whether you spin a single-sentence prompt into a 60,000-word story or just imagine you and Ed Sheeran sitting in a tent. As a self-insert narrator, you are as present or as absent as you want.

The protagonists of “x Reader” stories are similarly blank: often called “y/n,” short for “your name,” these stories are the most literal expression of “self-insert” imaginable, since the pairing is you, the reader, and the celebrity of the title. These stories vary, but sometimes they tread so lightly in an attempt to leave “y/n” as neutral as possible that they wind up feeling a bit like Mad Libs, instructing you to fill in, say, your favorite book rather than just name one the narrator might like. Sometimes x Reader stories follow a full narrative arc; other times they feel like a collected set of imagines. When I got sucked in researching, I wound up in a story where in each chapter, you successively date, then marry, each of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

The prevalence and growing popularity of images and x Reader stories amongst younger fans is a fascinating shift when I think of the self-inserts of previous generations. If a Mary Sue is a projection, a young woman’s ideal self on the page, then an imagine is more likely to be a reflection: exactly who you are, at the center of the story. Mary Sues are aspirational, but in a way, so are these other self-insert forms: they construct worlds in which your fictional self, going about your incredibly ordinary life, is just as important as Lieutenant Mary Sue. The story still bends around you.

The overwhelming popularity of self-inserts on Wattpad, a fanfiction hub with a younger demographic than other archives, leaves me both curious and hopeful about young girls right now, writing themselves into stories. I know that reader x boy-band-star-of-the-moment isn’t exactly a new construction; while I was working on my weird diverse corporate team and Flourish was helping the FBI catch aliens, my contemporaries were writing themselves into Hanson’s green room and *NSYNC’s tour bus, stories they’d later disavow (and, haltingly, reclaim).

Today’s social media is restructuring our conceptions of personal identity—we increasingly center ourselves in our own narratives. Don’t worry, I’m not about to go on some “narcissistic millennial” rant. Quite the opposite: it’s heartening to see young women, young queer people, young people of color, center themselves in narratives when our screens and pages are still lacking. In the fanfiction world, just like in the rest of the world, we still hold marginalized characters, original or otherwise, to impossible standards. But perhaps our embrace of Mary Sues—even if they’re the most achingly perfect young woman to ever command a ship in the Fleet—will help change things for the better.

John Ramirez #fundie search.stillsmallvoicetriage.org

John Ramirez, Escape from Hell Ex-Satanist

I grew up in a neighborhood that, first of all, the first killing that I experienced was feet away from me when I went to go in and get a gallon of milk. Was only 10 feet away from me, they shot a guy, like, 7 times. They shot him 7 times, it was a young boy. I've seen killings after killings after killings. In order to survive in the streets of the South Bronx you had to be a killer, you have to be a murderer, you have to smart, you have to be slick. On my father's side, it was all witches and warlocks. We lived on witchcraft, we had a contract right with the devil himself. I remember when I was younger, 8 or 9 years old, I seen him going through the room to worship the devil. I could see the presence of the devil come into that room. And my father was worshipping, speak in demonic tongues and worship and put flowers and put candles and put water out. 7:00 at night until 5:00 in the morning. I was already going to demonic church, I was going to witchcraft church. I was being trained to be a warlock, I was being trained with witches in the religion for 30 years, 40 years, 50 years. It was training me to know how to speak to principalities, spirits in the ground, the devil himself. You couldn't speak to the devil right away, you had to earn your right to speak to the devil.

In the first mass killing that they did in my neighborhood was at this house right here. The husband stabbed a lady 52 times and cut her ears off - here. And then me, my brothers would hang out with their daughter and we came to the house to walk them back home, to go hang out with the daughters right here and the daughters found their mother cut up to pieces here, in this house.

I was in a schoolyard playing with some friends in a schoolyard. A pastor came and they had this band came in, they were singing songs and people started to gather in the schoolyard. It was an amazing atmosphere, you know. Amazing joy in the schoolyard. I came from a broken home. This pastor's up on stage and he's talking about some Bible story and some Bible book and he's talking about how God loves everybody, ya know, this other stuff. And for the first time I'm getting kind of captivated. "Wow, maybe God does love me. Maybe God does want me. Maybe God wants my family. Maybe God wants to touch me and my family. Maybe He wants to change my family around." I said, "Wow, I can get some of that, I can get some of that. 'Cause He's coming my way." and for the first time ever I felt an incredible love that was indescribable. There's pastors coming off the stage, praying for people, touching people. So I said, "Now, it's my turn. Now he's gonna touch me." Ya know? Now Jesus is gonna accept me, Jesus is gonna show me what love is about. And this pastor passed me by. Never touched me, never laid his hands on me. He went down the line, and when he came up to me, he passed me by, he touched the other person. And I said, "Jesus don't love me, either. My dad don't love me, Jesus don't love me." I come from a broken home. Jesus - he likes the fact that my mother gets beat up. He likes the fact that I go to bed hungry. He like the fact that, you know, there's no heat in my apartment. he likes the fact that when we go to school, we're rejects, we're misfits in school.

So, this Jesus guy - he's just like my father. He's no different. He's just like my dad.

So, I went home, broken. I went home sad. I remember a week later, a couple of weeks later - two weeks later, I went to the schoolyard, hanging out, playing with a friend of mine's. I heard something fell and hit the ground. It was a voodoo necklace. So, I took the voodoo necklace - it had many colors - I took it, I put it on and the necklace was my first contract with the devil.

We went to a Tarot card reading, and when I went to a Tarot card reading, I was a little boy, I was 10 years old - we went in. The lady doing the Tarot card reading, called the witch lady, doing the Tarot card reading she was fascinated - had her eyes fixed on me. And she said, "This boy's got, this boy - we want him. We want him, we want him. The ___ which is Santeria want him. Spiritualism___ is Spanish, Santeria they call it worship of the saints, but it's not worship of the saints, it's worship of demons. We want him. And if you don't give him to us, he's going to lose his eyesight in 30 days." So, my mother was so desperate as a mother, my mother sold her furniture. My mother sold her bedroom set to get $250 to do my first ceremony, because this lady put so much fear in us, so much fear in my mother that my mother had to sleep on the floor, because there was no bedroom for her to sleep on, because she didn't want me to lose my eyesight.

So, they initiated me to the dark side. I was 8 to 10 years old. Their first love, the first contact I had, as a 10 year old boy, the devil showed up and took the offering of giving my life to him. And they put five beads around my neck. The five worst demons of principalities that are under Satan. They put them right around my neck, which is Santeria. They put them right around my neck and they said, "These are your spiritual guides. These are going to be your guardian angels, and they are going to take care of your life from now on."

(driving downtown) This is the building, this corner building here? Used to be almost abandoned, this building here - it's in the book. It used to be so broken down, my brother used to get the water from the pump - the pump (fire hydrant) right there. The apartment was all empty, all the apartments were abandoned, Only me and my family lived here. My whole childhood was stolen, my whole childhood was worshipping the devil, going to demon church. I would go to demon church from 7:00 in the evening to 5:00 in the morning, being trained by witches and warlocks, powers, principals, rites - who owned this region, who's in this region, who's running this principality, what principality name is this? I had...how to channel powers. By the age of 13 years old I was astro-projecting, my body - I would leave my body home and go to regions, in through the spirit and curse regions, curse a neighborhood, put the spirit of prostitution, the spirit of drugs onto the neighborhood. Homosexuality spirits here, demonic spirits here, a spirit of murder, spirit of suicide. I knew how to channel all these spirits into a neighborhood. At the age of 15, 16 years old, I was going into hospitals and putting death and ICU, death in one room so this person could die, because I wanted to be promoted with the devil. To move up the ranks, to be the biggest devil worshipper in New York City. The devil became my daddy. He replaced my dad, because I prayed - I said, "You kill my dad..." At the age of 33 years old my dad got shot in a nightclub, in the face, a woman that wasn't even his, when he had a good woman home - the devil took him out. The devil said, "I replaced the old to keep the new." And the devil became my daddy.

There was a club here, and my father died there. 33 years old. And we lived over there. And then, when I was 11 years old little boy, there was a store right here on the corner and a guy got shot in the street right there, right there - on the little corner here? Guy got killed there when I went to get the gallon of milk.

And I moved up the ranks, through devil worshipping, I moved up the ranks - I moved up through principalities and demons to the point that I was able to just sit with the devil like I'm sitting with you today. And the devil would manifest himself in human form, his presence would come into the room. And I would speak to the devil all night long. He would give me assignments. I would go to five clubs, five lounges a night, to look for people to recruit for the dark side. I would tell people their fortune. I would tell people their lifes, tell people the things that they did, things that was going to happen to them. Then they had no clue who I was, they didn't know who I was, I just had the demonic powers. I had a taste for blood. I would kill animals and drink their blood every week. If I didn't have money, didn't had time to buy an animal, I would cut myself and drink my own blood. The ring of the people that I was with, there was this demonic world: doctors, lawyers, principals, judges, police officers - they were all into witchcraft. Even singers today that are very well known. I would move principalities on that region to control demons on the ground operate to cut down the church, to cut down the growth of the church. To cut down the opportunity for people to get saved. I would be drunk, I'd come out of a club, half demon possessed, drunk. I was standing in the middle of the street and say to God, "Come down. You want some of this? You want me to slap you in your face? You want me to spit in your face? You come and mess with me."

I got married on Halloween. I had a demonic wedding on Halloween. I got married on Halloween. All the demons and principalities from different regions of around the work came to my wedding. No human beings came to my wedding, they were afraid to come to my wedding. So, I had a crazy...I sent out invitations, no one showed up. There were no wedding gifts. But demons came to my wedding, they baptized(?) my wedding. So my wife was a witch, I was a witch and then my daughter was born and I was training her to be a witch, too.

I remember the first time that I was going to sacrifice my first human being. The devil was sitting in the passenger side of my car when I parked. He said, "You love me?" I said, "Of course I love you, Dad." He said, "The guy on the rooftop, he's trying to...he's going to try to take you and hurt you and take your money. You'll kill him if you love me." So when I went up there to the rooftop, I lived on the 12th floor, I remember that. When I went up to the rooftop, I remember the part that he was hiding behind. He was hiding behind the stairway. This guy was 6'5", 250 pounds. I was half demon possessed. I felt that the demon went into me, it wasn't me anymore. So I was going to drag him into my apartment and stab him in the neck, 'cause I had a _____pot - it weighed about a hundred pounds plus, plus I had 9 machetes in it, it had knives in it that I ____ the roosters with. But when I went to grab this guy, I wanted to bring him to my apartment, he got off my hands, and just disappeared. He went down the stories - I mean this guy was like an Olympic athlete, he just - woosh - gone, he just disappeared. And I couldn't grab him and kill him. I was very disappointed that I couldn't kill my first human being.

(walking down a street, pointing to the side of a building) People wrote graffiti over it - this is a demon right here. Look at the demon that runs the gates of Hell. This is the one I was telling you about that is in my book on Santeria, right here. This little demon. This is the demon that runs Haiti. The principality over Haiti. The one that's over there is the principality over Islam. Look at this. To trap the people. The Truth. The Truth will set you free. They put that up there so that people can think they're part of this. (the cross.)

What is this place?

This a place where everyone in the park comes here to __? in witchcraft to hurt people, kill people. This is the place. We can go inside. Come on.

If I tell you I was going to kill you in 30 days, you prepare for your funeral, you was going to die in 30 days. I don't care who you were, I don't care who you knew, I don't care what religion you call yourself - you say you were Catholic, you were Christian, you say you were a believer - I was going to kill you. UNLESS you had a real relationship with Jesus Christ.

The lady that lived downstairs, she came up, she told me her husband was cheating. I want you to kill the woman he's cheating with, put a witchcraft spell on her and kill her. How much you charge me?

I said, "Look. Come back, I'm going to speak to the devil, my Daddy, for a time. Come back and I'll let you know in a couple days." The lady came back, the devil told me what to buy, he said to buy a coffin box, buy 21 black candles. Buy an image of the lady, put in the box, you know, to do the witchcraft to kill this lady. So we were going to do her for 21 days, she was going to die. after 21 days we were going to do her funeral. So the lady came to my house, we were going to charge her $10,000 dollars, I told her, to kill the lady. I said "Sure. I tell you what - I know you, you been good to me, everybody house parties...give me $7,000. I give you 30% off. I said, "I'll kill her. Give me - I'll take 30% off the 10, give me $7,000." So, when the lady was going to leave my house, she said, "By the way, the lady's a Christian. The lady's a Christian." I said, "I'll kill her for free." I said, "I don't need the money. I'll kill her for free. I'm going to teach these Christians a lesson they're gonna learn. I'll kill her for free." I told her, I don't want your money -I'll kill her for free.

So I did the voodoo thing, I did the witchcraft thing and 21 days went by and the lady didn't die. A month went by, the lady didn't die. And I was like, wow - what's going on? I mean, my reputation's on the line. So I called the devil, I called the demons that were assigned - I increased the witchcraft. I increased the witchcraft, I doubled the witchcraft on her, so she could die, like, overnight. Nothing was going on, nothing was going on. I was home at night and the devil shows up, the presence of the devil comes into my house. He tell me, "We have to abort the plan on the lady you want to kill." And I said, "Why would we want to abort the plan? My reputation is on the line. I'm a witch, I'm a warlock. If I don't kill the lady, people won't think that I have any powers." The devil say, "You don't understand. The God that she serves said don't - leave her alone. Don't touch her." And I said, "Who's this God?" He said, "The God that she serves."

I was so angry, I said no, give it one more week, but let's kill her. He said, "No. The God that she serves said leave her alone." From the witchcraft that I did on the lady, she should have been dead in less than 21 days.

(In a store)This is Jezebel. This is Jezebel in their religion. This is how it works. See these statues here, they don't mean nothing, but it's the demon behind it. So in order for me to identify with this, this has to be created, because i can't identify to a spirit. I can't identify to the spirit, we have nothing in common. I'm humanity, a spirit is immortality. A spirit is a spirit demon. I can't relate to it, so in order for me to relate to it, you have to put this guy in the middle, so I can relate to it, because he's human form. He looks like a human being. There's a story behind this guy, so you and I can related to him. so the demon operates through him. Understand? Same thing with these guys. And then they give themselves names and days and birthdays. The American Indians can get caught up with demonic forces, they can get caught up into the occult. These are the entrapment of the Native American Indians. But those are statues that the people use in demonic ways, in demonic religion. There's nothing in here that is holy, there's nothing...the only thing holy here is us standing here.

What happens in this place?

This here in the back, they do witchcraft in the back, they do voodoo, they do with spells in the back, they do cleansings in the back. All these demons they want you to buy a new statue so you can take a demon home. See, selected prayers. They make you believe that you're praying to God. Look. I used to use this book, selected prayers. They make you think that you're praying to God, but these prayers are not Godly prayers. Nothing in the Bible here, say nothing about the Bible, the crucifixion.

We had a book in New York City, in American. I was the third person to get this book that had symbols in the book of different demons, different principalities, of different ways of killing people with the witchcraft. I mean this book was so...no one had a copy of this book. You couldn't have a copy of this book unless the devil signed off on you. And I was the third person to receive that book. And I would take symbols in that book and do witchcraft to people, put people...make people lose their mind. I put witchcraft on people, make people get diseases out of nowhere. I put witchcraft on people, make people get leprosy. I put witchcraft on people, make people get cancer. I mean, I gave witchcraft to people, I gave people miscarriages, I gave people abortions, I put people in hospitals for surgeries, that didn't even have to go for surgeries. I did witchcraft so people would lose their minds. I spirits of bi-polar, of schizophrenia, spirits of disease on people. I put suicide spirits on people. I'd be up all night long, praying and talking to the devil - when Christians can't even go to church for one hour. When Christians can't even pray for one hour.

The spirit realm is more real than the natural realm. And we fail to see that. In whatever's not covered with Jesus Christ is an easy target to bring down. Like, and atheist - I could kill him easily. They are easy to kill. The Jehovah Witness was easy to destroy. The Mormon was easy to destroy. The people that walk around and say, "We don't believe in the devil." they were easy to destroy, because they didn't know how to seek any spiritual help.

I remember a time when Nicky Cruz came to...a Nicky Cruz group came into my neighborhood and they were called TRUCE. They would come and do drive-bys in my neighborhood. They would do, like, worship and then they would preach a word and then go to another corner and do the same thing. And I came after these groups to try to put, to try to bring them down, this group. And they were young kids, they were like 18, 17, 16, 20 - I mean. So I said how do they dare to place this junk, this filthy music in my neighborhood - see, they would call worship. This filthy music in my neighborhood, I would go after them. I would destroy these kids. So when I went up to where they were at, there was a wall of fire around them. I couldn't penetrate against them. And there was something that pushed me back, every time I try to throw demonic forces against them, something there would just push me back and I was never able to touch these kids. And I said, there was something here. It's not right. Something is not falling into place. So I walked away, I left them alone. I didn't want to deal with them, I said, okay - they won this first round.

(back in a store) So, it's obvious there are spirits here watching us.

Oh yeah, of course they're watching us.

Yeah, and so we're all protected, we're all...

Yeah, we're protected. We're under the Blood, brother. There ain't nothing like the Blood of Jesus. Amen? There's nothing that can touch us. We got a hedge of protection around us and we can walk into this place, we can chase demons out of here, we can curse the place to the ground, in Jesus' name and there's nothing that the devil can do.

I mean, I had so much money. Beautiful cars, beautiful woman, I had it all. I lived in a world that people...my neighborhood, my neighbors were terrified of who I was. They said, you mess with that guy, your family will die. You mess with that guy, he gonna get a gun, he'll kill you in your sleep. My daddy was awesome, my daddy was...he knew had had...he give me powers beyond what I could imagine. He gave me powers that people have fear of me, police have fear of me, the securities in my neighborhood fear me. People that knew that I was a devil - they would call me the devil's son. I brought Christians to their knees, not to pray, because they had no power. It wasn't because their God wasn't all powerful, don't get me wrong. Because their God was all powerful - the vessel was weak. The vessel had no prayer life, the prayer had no fasting life. And they had no relationship with God. There was a form of godliness in the person, but no power. The person was weak, the person had nothing going. He had a Bible, he had the right suit on, she had the right dress on - but there was no connection with Jesus Christ. Because they was out of His will, they was out of His promises and they was out of His divine purpose, and I had you. I owned you. I had you as a slave, I broke you, I put witchcraft on you. I kept doing that to Christian after Christian after Christian after families after churches. I'd chase everything down that represented the Cross of Jesus Christ.

(driving)Very demonic place.

So that place has an effect on the whole neighborhood, is what you're saying?

Oh yeah, of course. Oh yeah. This whole region unlocked that. That's the devil's throne, we just went into the devil's throne. (referring to the store they had been in)

That throne been there since the 80's. And then they go spend $100, $200 buying these things, and then they broke, they on welfare, public assistance. But they got money to buy all this junk, because they think their life is going to get better, they think that their life is going to improve, they gonna make progress in life, they think that they're going break generational curses. They think they're going break vex, spells, voodoo - they think they're gonna break all that, and basically, God says "I come. I'll do that for you for free."

He says give your life to Me, and I'll set you free. But they don't want that, that's too difficult for them. That's too complicated for them. But they can walk into a place like this and drop $200 and think that their life is gonna be free. And they're gonna live a life of abundance.

I had contact with the principality that runs Haiti. His name is Condero(?). I had contact with demons in Miami. I had contact with demons in Africa. I had contact with demons in New York City, principalities that run crossroads of the world. He owns 42nd street. Okay? There's a different principality that runs crossroads of the world here on 42nd street than the one that tries to run this neighborhood.

I didn't have a conscience. I remember I did witchcraft to my brother, I put him in jail for 5 years. Witchcraft - to my own brother, my own flesh and blood. I did witchcraft and put him in jail for 5 years. My other brother, there was a warlock. He came into my house one time with an attitude and the demon jumped on him. He ran out the house, he couldn't hold the pain in his stomach. My mother can bear witness to that. I did so much ceremonies in my body. I did so much ceremonies in my body, the last ceremony I did - I not only sold myself to the devil, I did a ceremony were I had to swallow animal blood and gunpowder. It was called (?) This is a ceremony of Haitian and French. If you do this ceremony with a demon - so when I go to people's houses and eat, they can't put witchcraft on the food. I did all the ceremonies you can do.

I would go to demon church. Every year, we would have a meeting, a secret meeting. All the high witches and warlocks would have this meeting to find out what principality was gonna usher out and bring in to run the region. We were more organized than the church itself. The kingdom of darkness was more organized than the church of Jesus Christ. We knew how to do ceremonies, we knew how to do things before the year was over to prepare ourselves for the next year. When Christians couldn't go to church and pray for one hour. When Christians couldn't go to church and have a consistent relationship with God. I even took a sabbatical from witchcraft and the devil punished me - took my eyesight for one year. I was completely blind for one year. Was registered with the Commissioner for the Blind. I was completely blind. They were training me to use a Seeing Eye dog, they were training me to use one of these sticks that you use to walk the streets. My mother took care of me for one year. My eyes went black. And a mist of gray went over my eyes. I was completely blind. And when I gave my life back to the devil, after 7 surgeries, the devil gave me back my eyesight. And I could see again. And that was my punishment for taking one year off, I wanted to take off. The devil said, you want one year off? I give it to you. He took my eyesight.

And that's the world I lived in. If you mess with the devil, he'll kill you, he'll kill your family. It was a fear that was great beyond measure, that you could not leave this religion. You could not leave Santeria, you could not leave ______, you could not leave spiritualism. The doctors could not explain how I lost my eyesight. Meanwhile, Christians - and would say, what Christians do bad, Christians sometimes missed the mark, and the only thing that shows up in their house is grace and mercy. When you're short with the devil, you do something the devil don't like - he kill someone. He kill your family member. I remember the devil warned this lady, he said you can't be with that person no more and she didn't care, 'cause she was in love with the person - the devil demon-possessed a homeless guy in the street. He took a hammer and hit her 17 times on her head, killed her.

One day, I was sitting home. It was amazing. I came from a nightclub the night before. I was sitting home watching a show called Jerry Springer, a crazy show - people beating each other up. I got joy outta that, I was getting joy outta that, laughing. For the first time I heard a voice say to me, "Son. I am coming soon. What are you going to do with your life?" An audible voice, shouting from across the room. And I thought it was the TV talking to me..But then I saw it can't be the TV, these people were beating each other up. This voice... I knew the voice of the devil, I would sit with the devil like I'm sitting with you today. He would come into human form, he would come in the room, he would come in sometime, the presence come into the room. The atmosphere changes and I now he was there for me, and he was talking to my conscience. I would talk back and we would talk all night long. I knew that, too. I knew him like you knew the back of your hand. I knew every demon, every principality that ran the region, that ran everything in America. Everything in Canada. Everything that ran - I know every principality that ran every occult, wicca, new age, buddhistism, Islam, Andria, spiritualism - I knew every principality that ran. I had a contract with every principality with them, I had straight A marks with every principality, with every demon in the ground, the devil, Jezebel. I had every - I knew demons that I couldn't even tell you names, because you wouldn't know who they are. I knew them all by name. And this voice was very different than any other voice. When I heard that voice come out of nowhere - it came out of the air. The Voice.

I went into shock. And then I saw a vision from the other side of the apartment like the sky was on fire, and people underneath - I saw people running for cover but there was no cover, where to hide. And I think, why did I see that vision? So I shook it off. But I remember I went to sleep, like a deep sleep, like someone put on anesthesia and I went to sleep. I ended up in a train full of people. I couldn't believe I was in a train full of people. And this train was going faster than you could ever imagine. I'd never been on something this fast on Earth. And it went into hell. And Jesus Christ took me to hell. And when I got to hell, the doors opened. I mean, there was a slam in the doors, there was an unspeakable echo that struck all the doors open and there was heat that came out of nowhere. It felt like you were gonna suffocate, the heat that came out. I ran, I got out the train and the people on the train, they had no faces. But you could see the fear on the people on the train. You could feel the fear, the impact of the fear that they were going to a place that they were never going to return. And the place was packed.

And then, I tried, I said, "I can't die here. I can't die here. This is not for me. I wasn't born to be in this place." I was saying this to myself, I was not born to be here. So I tried to find like a tunnel, a tunnel in hell. I was walking, trying to run through the tunnels in hell, trying to find a door. Maybe a window. Maybe there was a gap somewhere that I can come out and come back to reality. But there was no gap. I remember as I...the more I went into the tunnels, the more the fear gripped me, the more the suffering. I heard suffering, just draped over you. This fear drapes over you like you're wearing a garment. This fear drapes over you, something you can't even control. You have no control over. Something like, it grabs you. It don't let you go. I couldn't see the hand in front of my face. But I hear the wailing - I hear wailing. Like, you ever hear like a kid wail, an animal wail at the same time. It's like, they're kinda wailing, it's indescribable. And there was heat and a smell that was like...like if you was in the sewers or the gutters in New York City. I mean, but crazier than that. As I came to a part of the tunnel, the devil showed up. He said, "I was your Daddy. I gave you everything you needed. I took care of you. I blessed you. I protected you. I killed people for you. I did...I give you powers, I give you a name in the darkness, the kingdom of darkness. I gave you a name. When people came against you I destroyed them, because I knew you were going to be the vessel I was going to use to move my kingdom on the Earth. And now you want to leave me? Now you want to betray me? In demonic tongues, and I'm talking back to him in demonic tongues and telling him no, I'm not leaving, I'm just confused. I don't know what's going on. And he said, "No. I know what you're going to do. You're going to leave me and you're going to expose my religion. You're going to expose who i am and how I operate in the realm, in the spirit realm. Because I taught you things that I never taught no one else. I showed you. I trusted you with the things that I needed you to know so you can further my kingdom. Because I wanted to use you in a greater measure way." And in the confusion, he went to grab me. He went to grab and destroy me and the Cross of Jesus appeared. I didn't understand how a cross, a three foot cross appeared in hell, when I was wearing blue shorts and a T-shirt. And I put it on him. And when I put it on him, the devil melt like he was an infant, like an infant he melt and fell on the floor. Like, no powers. So I took that opportunity and I ran deeper into the gates, I ran deeper into the tunnels of hell, hoping that there was a door. I had...my hope was being...there was not hope in the hope at all. There was no place saying I'm coming out of here! This was it, this was the end. I had a fear that gripped me that was indescribable - I never felt fear like that, ever felt a despair - it was the opposite of what Heaven is, opposite of Joy, opposite of gladness, opposite of Peace. It was opposite of light and darkness. It was a place of torment, a place of...if I'm here, my family won't know I'm here. My daughter won't know I'm here. How would they find me? How would they look for me?

As I went deeper into the tunnel of hell, hoping that there was a door, a window, a crack somewhere that I can get out, the devil showed up again. "So now, we'll destroy you." I told him in the demonic language, I've got these marks, these are my contracts to protect me, to destroy you. He said, "Fool! I gave you those marks. Those are my marks that I OWN you. I OWN YOU. No one owns you, I do. And you're gonna live for me or you die." And he went to grab me a second time around. I said, this is it. He went to grab me a second time around - the Cross of Jesus Christ appeared in hell. There's no greater love than the Cross that would come for a sinner like me, in hell. So when David says, "If I make my bed in hell, He knows I'm there." Grace and Mercy showed up in hell. Grace and Mercy knew my address. Grace and Mercy have a plan for my life. To my unspeakable, demonic, selfish ways. Arrogant, self-centered ways in hell, when I was down for the count. Jesus Christ loved the misfit. And He said, "I have a plan for you. I love you more than you can ever imagine." And He showed up in hell. And when I woke up, my spirit came back into my body. I woke up and I bend my knee to Jesus Christ. I had $100,000 of witchcraft in my house. I threw witchcraft away, I threw religion away. I threw everything that had to do with darkness away. The people from Haiti, the people from Cuba, the people from Miami and New York said, "we have to kill him, because he knows too much. We have to destroy him. We have to kill him, because he knows too much. He's not one of us anymore."

And they came for the kill. They did their best, they came for the kill. I was asleep in the day. It was day and night when the demons showed up and tormented me 30 days. They tormented me for 30 days. They would grab me by my throat, pick me up off my bed. The room grew cold, I would lay in my bed. I'd feel another person laying next to me, ice cold, another person. I would look like this, and feel the presence. The presence was the devil himself, laying in my bed for 30 days. On and off, on and off trying to torture, trying to steal my mind, trying to rip my soul out of my body, trying to rip my spirit out of my body. I would tremble at night, like I never trembled before. 30 days. And I would cry out, I didn't know how to pray? I said, "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" I didn't know how to pray. I say, my sister prays - I heard her in church, she pray this way. I heard that person pray this way - I would bring all these prayers together, to try to pull them together like a puzzle, trying to fight for my life.

One day, I was in church worshipping. And I asked the Lord, "Lord, why are You letting this happen to me?" And one day I heard the voice of God again. He said, "I want to see how much you love Me. I want to see how much you trust Me." And never again, I was tormented by the devil. And I became an evangelist for Jesus Christ. Fourteen years serving the Lord and I would never trade it for nothing in the world. Over on Hallelujah Boulevard, there's a mansion for John Ramirez. And one days says, Welcome Home, well done faithful servant. And I tell you, there's nothing - I'm not talking about Christianity - I'm talking about a relationship with Jesus Christ. He is my Lord. He is my beginning and end. No weapon formed against me will ever prosper. I die when Jesus say I go Home. Not because of a witch. Not because of a person. Not because hex, voodoo, incantation - none of that can separate me from the love of God.

drkresearch #conspiracy nodisinfo.com

Analysis of White Van in Toronto Pedestrian Attack Proves it is a Hoax

For a van that purportedly ran over some 10 people, killing them, then striking another 15 or so, it surely is relatively clean. Now, keep in mind that the human body is a, essentially, a sealed bag of soft-tissue compartmentalized fluids, some 70% fluid matter by weight. Surely, if a metal object weighing multiple tons were to strike a human or a group of them at a high rate of speed, as is acclaimed, there would be evidence of this not just in regard to the injury patterns but also on the van itself.

Yet, there is no such evidence, categorically. For instance, according to ‘eye’ witnesses the van did strike metallic objects, including ‘mail boxes,’ crumpling them and running them over the people, mangling the boxes and people together, and also, apparently, this newspaper stand and also a fire-hydrant.

Both these are yellow in color. By the way, where is the water fountain that would consequently occur from the knocking off the hydrant?

The fact is there is no yellow paint to be found anywhere. Moreover, this looks like a junk-yard van which has rear-ended another vehicle.

Supposedly, it struck people so hard they were “flung into the air”, while in one case it struck a person so hard, it is acclaimed, that the person was flung from the street back into the store. These are mere movie-style story lines. There is no evidence to any degree that they are true.

Here is an image of the van provided through a McClain’s video of it driving through a red-light. The same type of damage is seen:

The vehicle was followed by an unmarked police car some 30 seconds later, also seen in the video.

These are some of the people that the van was supposed to have hit. They do not look by any means as actual vehicle strike victims:

This was a psyops, a mere staged event. The supposed murderer/driver is a military individual. It’s a set-up. There is nothing real about it. The injuries are mere moulage. Nor actual trauma or blood is seen. No one was run over. All the witnesses are merely crisis actors, paid for their inane roles.

Notice also how perfectly parallel it is parked against the buildings. How is that possible?

Moreover, there is not even a spec of any matter that would indicate a strike or multiple strikes against living beings:

Nor is there even a crack on the windshield. Nor is there any blood or human tissue on the tires. Instead, the crumpling, universal as it is, indicates a strike against another vehicle. Therefore, the bodies cannot be real, dead bodies, and the wounds cannot be real ones manifested with actual arterial blood:

This is nothing other than mere water-soluble paint. Nevertheless, no injuries of any kind are seen. As well, what are these mere common people, young women, doing dressing the wounds of a person with a potentially fatal vehicle-induced crush injury? As well, where are their rubber gloves to prevent their contaminating his wounds?

Where are the tread marks on this man’s chest or face? Where are the crush wounds, as expected to his face and chest from being struck by a multiple-ton vehicle?

Nor can the perpetrator be real and, thus, must necessarily be a part of the scam:

Image result for images; van; toronto; attack; pedestrian; ryder van

Guns are illegal in Toronto. He is pointing what is reportedly a cell phone towards the officer.

He was ‘suiciding himself by cop,’ some of the movie-style actors reported:

Image result for images; van; toronto; attack; pedestrian; ryder van

It is, regardless, inane to the extreme to believe that this possibly active duty military man would do this as a real, actual act and then, after running over all those people, point a cell phone at a police officer. The cop is pointing a gun at him. Yet, he is simple standing upright, not even flinching.

Even where the van was parked is part of the staging and scam. Notice that it was parked in an area with Arabic writing and with hanging material that obstructed any view from the ground level within the building:

Also, this building is under construction and is largely empty. This is a hoax and a scam. There is no other possibility.

fkapnist #fundie godtube.com

(In comment section)

I personally think that Darwin arrived at his theory from observing stages of embryo development through various abortions on factory floors. He had to flee on the SS Beagle and keep his true research secret or face the English gallows. The real clash between evolution and the bible is the creation of Eve: from the rib of Adam. I can understand this as a dimorphic clone. Bone marrow cell syringed (why men have nipples) and cloned into an opposite sex (dimorphic) carbon copy. Dr. Michio Kaku (of string theory fame) says God and archangels are a Type 3 Civilization that is immortal. Mastery of science doesn't crush faith in Jesus. Doesn't it make sense that beings who have attained eternal life won't spend eternity in robes and sandals, but enjoy technologies beyond man's wildest dreams? And if they do visit earth, it also makes sense that atheists will not be eligible for immortality, especially if they deny that such advanced beings may have a King named Christ. Why risk being a fool before the masters of science and originators of life?

Vox Day #sexist voxday.blogspot.com

Captain Beagle: Which is worse, work or rape? I know 2 women who were raped. Go fuck yourself #sorrynicepplhadtohearthat

VD: Hey, talk to @johnscalzi not me. I certainly didn't rape them.

Captain Beagle: no your article suggested an increase in rapes was less harmful than women handing out resumes. Insensitive & absurd

VD: I didn't suggest it, I proved it. By what metric do you claim that rape is more harmful to society than women working?

Captain Beagle: I was unaware one needed statistical data to prove rape is harmful.

VD: You need something, at any rate. What is your basis for claiming rape is worse for society than female employment?

Captain Beagle: thanx for this fascinating study in hyperbolic misogyny. I'm thinking of using you as the template for my next villain.

Linda #fundie raycomfortfood.blogspot.com

BTW, your comment on a 'brilliant' Darwin is absurd. I read a book on Darwin and it paints him differently than the "A"s show him.

He was aboard the HMS Beagle, but he smoked hash, a drug abuser, and was a womanizer, when he paid for it. He made his 'half wit' conjectures under the influence of alcohol, and sea sickness.

I don't know about you, but that is not my kind of hero! :)

An outcast of the science community of that day. His conjectures were REJECTED!
He was put in a Insane Asylum!

Are you sure you know Darwin as well as you proclaim ?

That is NOT .. Brilliant!

Stan Solomon #fundie rightwingwatch.org

The left, which is godless and serves Satan, has an agenda. To accomplish their agenda they have to get idiots, morons, numbnuts to do stupid things so the focus will be on them and not on the libs, not on the leftists. Jews, homosexuals, blacks, gays, Islamists, you may think they’re disparate groups, they’re not, they’re all tools. Because while we’re mad at these two punks, we’re mad at Trayvon Martin, that thug that deserves to be dead and I’m glad he’s dead.

Pieces of crap, homosexuals like what’s that one guy’s name? [Dan] Savage. That faggot. That horrible, awful, terrible excuse for a human being who is at the White House promoting attacks on Christians. I hope he dies — he probably will — of every disease known. By the way, I’m sending him a fire hydrant for his birthday, I’m hoping he’ll sit on it; he’ll slide all the way down to the ground. Sorry fire hydrant fans, I don’t mean to insult fire hydrants.

At any rate, do you understand what I’m saying here? These groups are being recruited. Environmentalists, nuclear freeze, it doesn’t make a difference what group it is. If you put anything ahead of doing what’s right in God’s eyes, or better yet ignoring the reality of God, then you’re a tool, you’re a useful idiot.

SlashGordon #fundie youtube.com

Don't you think it's sad to rely on a belief (Darwinism), that was started by someone that had absolutely no PhD in any kind of science, including biology? He was just a scientist wannabe, that studied earthworms for over 30 yrs. and stared at finches beaks a lot. Someone should've check out his mental state before allowing him to board the Beagle (or was that the U.S.S. Minnow?).

Illusion #fundie rr-bb.com

Also of interest is the name of the e.u. vessel [to Mars]...the 'Beagle 2'. That was the name of the boat Charles Darwin used to venture out into the uncharted areas to do his 'research'. Interesting thoughts come to mind don't they?

Jason Todd #fundie christiannews.net

On North Carolina attempting to pass a law barring same-sex marriage

Michael C:
These elected officials either have no understanding of our system of government or they're relying on the fact that their constituents don't.

They're either wasting North Carolinian's hard earned money because they don't know how to do their jobs or they're wasting North Carolinian's hard earned money because they think they the people of North Carolina are ignorant.

Is wasting tax payers hard earned money acceptable if all you're doing is stomping your feet and banging your fists against the ground?

Jason Todd:
What is the basis for your argument?

Michael C:
A state legislature is not granted the power to nullify the parts of the U.S. Constitution that they don't like.

Any attempt to do so is an obvious waste of time and taxpayers' hard earned money.

So, are they wasting time and money because they're ignorant of how our system of government works or are they wasting time and money because they think their constituents are ignorant of how our system of government works?

Jason Todd:
Marriage isn't in the Constitution, which you bloody well know. That makes it a state issue, as per the 10th Amendment.

You need to stop being intellectually dishonest. But then again, the facts aren't on your side, are they?

Michael C:
Marriage is not specifically outlined in the Constitution, correct. How is it, then, that state laws that prohibit interracial marriage are in violation of the Constitution?

Jason Todd:
What does skin color have to do with sexual behavior?

Michael C:
Nothing that I've intimated.

...does that mean you're not going to address the simple question?

How is it that state laws prohibiting interracial marriage are in violation of the Constitution even though the Constitution doesn't even mention marriage??

Jason Todd:
The answer is it's irrelevant. Homosexuals like to equate the two to make some kind of argument, but the fact is it's the same as comparing a potato chip to a fire hydrant. It's nonsensical and won't be entertained.

Michael C:
No. You're just refusing to answer the question.

You're claiming that because the U.S. Constitution doesn't explicitly mention marriage, it's solely a state issue. You're refusing to respond to my relevant questions because you're wrong and you know it.

Thank you for this thoroughly useless conversation.

GodGunsGuts #fundie freerepublic.com

That’s why the Temple of Darwinian Materialism needs to be exposed for the religion it is, and forced to compete against rival theories of origins in the free market of scientific ideas. Let’s face it, the HMS Beagle is already in the process of sinking. Even the Evos are starting to call for the funeral of Darwin’s fanciful creation myth so that “evolution might live.” However, if the unconstitutional government and court supports are knocked out from underneath the Temple of Darwin, the HMS Beagle will sink faster than the lead weights the Mob uses to send their victims to watery graves.

The Rev. Doyle Peyton #fundie mansfieldnewsjournal.com

The Beagle [space probe] is dead. Thank God! I am referring to the British space vehicle sent to Mars for a Christmas landing. I'm not against science exploration. I am against a propaganda mission disguised as science exploration. Both this trip and its original namesake were like the planes taken over by the terrorists. They were on a mission. They had an agenda. Darwin didn't discover evolution on his famous trip. Both his father and grandfather were old evolutionary infidels. Evolution is as old as Lucifer, who refused to accept the fact he was a created being. If they can just find evidence of water, they feel they can make a case for evolution... Peter rightly nailed this one when he said they were 'willingly ignorant.'

Issac #fundie yecheadquarters.com

Some facts about Darwin and Lyell that most evolutionists don't want you to know:

1) Neither Darwin or Lyell had "any" degrees in science.
2) Darwin's only degree was in theology. He was going to be a preacher before he boarded the Beagle (ship).
3) Lyell had a degree in being a lawyer. But he wrote the book that made Darwin question God.
4) In the day that Darwin earned his degree in theology, what they taught was Bible literalism. Which also means that Darwin was taught and believed in the literal six day creation. Which would make him a YEC before he rejected God to write his theory.
5) Lyell was basically a Bible scoffer who hated God, and used a type of intelligent peer pressure technique to convince people to his way of thinking. Which basically told people that unless they believed the way he did, they would be deemed as ignorant and uneducated. And as you probably know this same technique is used by evolutionists even today.

So if you ever wondered why evolution seemed so well put together to conflict with YEC. You have to remember that the person who wrote it turned against YEC because of the peer pressure Lyell wrote in his book. And if you wonder where the actual idea came from for man coming from animals. It was from part of Darwins teachings where he had to learn about other pagan religions while earning that theology degree. So the idea that man came from animals can be traced back to the time of Moses. Where Egyptian religion believed this, and their gods were half man half animal. So evolution actually has it's roots in Pagan religion, and Darwin was not the originator of that idea. He just made it popular, and introduced it to science as a way to replace God and the Bible that he had rejected.

David J. Stewart #fundie #sexist jesusisprecious.org

“BE OF GOOD CHEER,” Oh Christian! That is exactly what our dear Lord exclaimed in John 16:33b. We have the hopeful expectation BY FAITH that things will ultimately improve, life will eventually get better, and our days of misery and suffering on earth are numbered. Did you know that suffering is as much a part of the Christian's life as salvation? Philippians 1:29, “For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake;” When we suffer, we suffer with our dear Savior, heirs together of ALL THINGS! Romans 8:17, “And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ; if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together.” Romans 8:32, “He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?” Oh, it is wonderful to be a Christian!!! BY FAITH, a Christian can be cheerful in suffering, in rejection by peers, in sorrow from loneliness, from bodily afflictions due to poor health, and from all that life can throw at us!! THANK YOU LORD FOR YOUR BLESSINGS ON ME!!!

Let me preach a bit against sin here. We are now living in a wicked, ungodly, untoward, ungrateful society in the United States! I am disturbed when I see young women adorned with tattoos (tramp stamps), which are marks of worldliness. I don't care if you got a tattoo for a loved one who died, tattoos are worldly! If you already have one, I would never deliberately hurt your feelings; what's done is done! I am preaching to those of you who still have your untarnished Birthday Suit...lol! Your “Birthday Suit” is the suit you were born with (i.e., your body). I think the most beautiful women are plain gals who wear no makeup, no tattoos, no fake implants, no plastic surgery; just a wonderful woman! Granted, a little paint on the old barn never hurt anything, but some women look like a Tammy Faye Bakker clown! Just like cooking a great meal, the key to using spices or makeup is in moderation. Whether spices or makeup, the purpose of their use is to compliment, not dominate. Those ugly tattoos don't come off!!! Call me old-fashioned, I don't care; God made the human body the exact way He wanted it, unmarked by man's art! There is nothing as ugly to me as a 50 year old woman covered in green tattoo ink, looking like a sailor.

Americans have lost respect for the sacredness of life, marriage, bedroom and the human body; evidenced by the evils of abortion, public nudity, filthy television, tattoos and an epidemic of fornication! The average American young woman today is a bar-hopping, boozing, feminist, slutty, fornicator! Having “a relationship” today is merely a clever way of diminishing the awfulness of sin! Someone needs to call a whore a WHORE! When a young woman says: “I'm not in a relationship right now,” what she actually means is: “I've temporarily quit my whoring around!” You know it is true!!! I say that kindly with God's love, as a King James Bible-preacher! America's pulpits are dry, dead and void today of tough Bible-preaching. We need a whole new breed of Spirit-filled preachers in America, weak men who live on their knees in prayer, reviving the fiery preaching of EVANGELIST BILLY SUNDAY (1862-1935)...

By the way, Pastor Jack Hyles met Helen Thompson Sunday (aka, “Ma Sunday,” 1868-1957). May I say, young ladies, GET MARRIED before giving some bum your most prized possession—your virtue! It is so tragic, but true, that women today are as mere fire-hydrants for men who are filthy dogs!!!

The only thing uglier to me than a tattooed woman is a woman who doesn't smile. A person's smile speaks much concerning their spiritual condition. I smile everywhere I go when I meet people, because I have the joy of the Lord in my soul. I CHOOSE TO THINK ABOUT GOD'S LOVE TOWARD ALL HUMANITY!!! If you think hate, you will hate; if you think love, you will love! I control my thought life, as the Holy Bible teaches, by yielding my thoughts to Christ. 2nd Corinthians 10:5-6, “Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ; And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.” This is not thought-control, it is walking in the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22-25).

Antipodean Resistance #racist everydayantisemitism.com

Around 60 antisemitic and anti-immigrant posters were plastered on several schools in Melbourne, Australia.

The posters encouraged the public to join neo-Nazi groups and to “reject Jewish poison”, showing a stereotypical antisemitic image of a Jew as a puppet-master directing “multiculturalism” and “degeneracy”, a classic antisemitic conspiracy theory.

Images like this are a clear illustration of how, despite the fact that general anti-immigration and white supremacist ideas are central to the far right’s ideology, Jews are often singled out as the root cause of the “problems” they identify. Here, Jewish domination is portrayed as steering other things they object to.

The neo-Nazi group Antipodean Resistance claimed responsibility for the posters. On their website, the group describe “substance abuse” and “homosexuality” as “irresponsible distractions laid before us by Jews and globalist elites”.

Their website is explicitly neo-Nazi, calling for National Socialism in Australia, and is littered with Nazi imagery, including the Swastika, pagan images associated with neo-Nazism, and the skull image used as a logo by Nazi groups like Combat 18. They claim to be the “Hitlers you’ve been waiting for”.

The Victoria State Education Minister, James Merlino, condemned the posters, stating “these sort of vile and disgusting comments and posters are not acceptable in the community and those individuals that placed them should be ashamed of themselves”.

SIB (aka TimRattayGotScrewed) #sexist fstdt.com

LOL, the replies in this thread actually support MGTOW theory. All women are psychopaths if you piss them off, and you need to sleep with one eye open? Gee, I wonder why these men aren't excited to sign up for this!

"Nurse porn isn't representative of reality. What you're describing here is a bimbo in a naughty nurse outfit. Also, I doubt it would be her fault if she couldn't hold an even remotely intelligent conversation with you."

Well, I know two blonde, white female nurses in real life. They both got knocked up by black guys in high school. And oh yeah, they were, like, real geniuses, let me, like, tell you.


"Also, bonus points for the subtle homophobic rhetoric. At last we know where do gay men fit in their deranged little worldview."

I don't see subtle homophobic rhetoric. Looks like you're just imagining things like a typical SJw.

"That "effeminate boyfriend" is probably cumming his brains out with his cute girlfriend. I doubt he'd complain."

I think he would complain after getting dumped for a woman.

"Yadda yadda yadda, recycled alt-right lingo and manuresphere terminology, with added scorn for ugly women. Give me something that doesn't bore me out of my mind."

I don't see any added scorn. I just see an honest description. Again viewed through the SJW prism. I guess you're just offended by the word, "ugly," itself. As the late George Carlin put it..."physiologists have actually started to refer to ugly people as, 'those with severe appearance deficits.'" Should have known...that was in 1990 and now it's The Current Year.

"I really don't get what's the problem with someone who's into dainty, femmy things. It's a taste like any other. I thought your ilk preferred women to be traditionally feminine, and spent day in day out crying about how trashy "Stacies" are?"

As usual, you can't even stay on topic. The thread is about how all women fall into archetypes. It's not, "durr hurr, 3.5 billion people, durr hurr. Dere's someone for everybody as long as you stop engaging in my soggy knee, durr hurr." Once you encounter and recognize the several different archetypes, if you don't like any of them, there's nobody out there for you.

"High fuckin talk coming from you, considering all y'all's griping about how precious virginity is. Do you think you can just shove a fire hydrant in there at the first time without any pain? Human anatomy F-. Sit down."

Wow, this thread is sailing over your head by a country mile.

"Niiiiice. You're right back to the usual incel shit; if sexism and homophobia wasn't enough to melt any woman's panties in your immediate vicinity, you're a fucking racist as well. Keep going my little dude, you're sure to land a femoid that way."

Racism is the belief in a racial hierarchy, i.e. certain races are superior to others. That is not what is being said here. All races of women are bashed equally here. The ones being bashed are women, not blacks. Try to keep up with your small, woman brain.

"Something tells me this guy is white."

Reverse the races in that sentence and suddenly you would be called a "racist." It's all about privilege points and what percent victim you are.

"Note how he included at least two specific "types" for each ethnicity up to this point. But Asians can only be small and cute but also treacherous, that's apparently the only kind of Asian girl to exist. Yellow Fever and Yellow Peril, two tired stereotypes for the price of one! Who could possibly refuse such an offer! /s "

Ever heard of the word, "cultural?" You dishonah family.

Moishe the beagle #racist bbs.dailystormer.com

I'm Aussie too and I worry about Chinese more than any other group. They are so smarmy and successful no one minds them. We have Reclaim Australia and the whole "patriot" movement fixated on Muslims because there are obvious offences there, but no one says a word about the Chinks any more. The issue of foreign investment is too distant and abstract for folks to get worked up,about until it's too late. i just don't know what our game plan should be over here. I'm jealous of the Europeans in a way because they have an enemy who has openly declared war on them, and Americans also have groups like Mexicans pouring in thriving on White tax dollars. Conversely our traitor government is smart enough to make a big show of rejecting illegals. Our migration policy means that our enemies are more likely to be doctors and IT professionals than welfare dependants. How do we create a sense of us-and-them in the average person's mind?

Anna Wilson #fundie aeon.co

In his essay ‘Uncritical Reading’ (2004), the Yale English professor Michael Warner writes about the way that universities break students of disreputable reading habits. When students first enter the classroom, he writes:

They identify with characters. They fall in love with authors… they shop around among taste-publics, venturing into social worlds of fanhood and geekdom… Their attention wanders; they skim; they skip around. They mark pages with pink and yellow highlighters. They get caught up in suspense. They laugh; they cry. They get aroused (and stay quiet about it in class). They lose themselves in books, distracting themselves from everything else, especially homework like the reading I assign.

The kind of reading that Warner describes his students bringing in from outside the classroom – excessive, feelings-y, full-body reading – is often associated with reading for pleasure, gobbling up genre fiction such as horror and romance on a lunch break or in the bath; getting the shivers, getting aroused, weeping, the glow from a happy ending. These aren’t pleasures of the classroom. They aren’t for serious literature.

As the literary critic Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick put it in her essay ‘Paranoid Reading and Reparative Reading’ (2002), students are taught instead to master what Paul Ricoeur termed ‘the hermeneutics of suspicion’. ‘Hermeneutics’ (from the Ancient Greek for ‘translating’) denotes a method or system of interpretation, a way of finding out something. Students are taught to take an objective, almost hostile attitude to a text, to pick it to pieces and investigate it like a crime. They must not love it too much.

The hermeneutics of suspicion is built on centuries of philosophical and pedagogical ideologies that separate body and mind, then rank the mind above the body. As feminist critics have pointed out, these are sexist ideologies, because they associate the mind, in all its rational dimensions, with men, and the body with women, effeminacy and femininity. Indeed, universities were largely closed to women until the 20th century, in part because male academics claimed that women were incapable of distancing their emotions from their thinking. Generations of women had to prove themselves in the academy by being more rational, more clinical, more careful about how they showed emotion to male colleagues; only in the 1970s did feminist critics in Paris such as Luce Irigaray and Hélène Cixous – whose work influenced Sedgwick and Warner – begin to question the assumption that bodies and feelings had no place in literary criticism.

Growing up, I loved books. I loved them so much that I went to graduate school to study them, and I didn’t read a novel for five years. One of the terrible secrets about attending graduate school in literature is that it can ruin your ability to read for pleasure; pick up a book, and a nasty voice whispers that you should be reading something serious – or reading something seriously. So in the classroom, I learned to put away my body. Outside of the academy, however, specifically through fanfiction, I was learning to read with it.

I discovered fanfiction in 2001, when I was 16, unhappy at school, and frequently mistaken for a boy in women’s bathrooms. I’d joined a number of web mailing listservs, desperate to make friends, and I remember vividly the first time one of the fanfiction writers I followed posted a story she’d written about a character from The Lord of the Rings. I was staggered. It was like nothing I’d ever read before. Suddenly, I had a word for a genre that I had known intimately for years.

I’d always fantasised about stepping into books and having adventures with my favourite characters. Now I wrote them down and shared them. Strangers left positive comments on each chapter. I discovered that I could write. Later, I learned that there was a name for this kind of story: ‘Mary Sue’. The name comes from the short satire ‘A Trekkie’s Tale’ (1973), written by the mathematician Paula Smith and first published in a Star Trek fanzine to parody the flood of (in her opinion) terrible fanfiction stories in which all-American teenagers with names such as Mary Sue stride into the world of the Starship: Enterprise and win Captain Kirk’s fickle heart. Smith’s parody is embarrassingly similar to my first story, and thousands like it online, written by young women experimenting with fanfiction. But as I read more widely, I discovered a rich vein of sophisticated and brilliantly written fanfiction, offering insights into characters I knew and loved.

While bingeing on Harry Potter fanfiction, I was taking courses at high school, then university, in classical and medieval literature. I learned Latin, and read Virgil, Cicero and St Augustine in the original language. I wrote cold, sober, critical essays, but stayed up late into the night with fanfiction, my guilty pleasure, seemingly as far removed from the study of literature as it was possible to be. I moved to Canada to go to graduate school. By then I knew that fantasising about meeting Geoffrey Chaucer, or imagining what Queen Eleanor of Aquitaine might do if she met Sir Lancelot, was not the way serious readers did it. But I struggled with cognitive dissonance, since it was obvious to me that fanfiction had made me good at reading.

Mike_L #fundie rr-bb.com

By the way, the 'Beagle 2,' huh? I had not given that name much thought, but it is chilling. Many people already hold the belief that we were 'seeded' here. New agers are also claiming that virtually every religious leader/philosopher was sent to us by our 'space brothers' and were not divine in any way.

War Beagle #fundie city-data.com

Ten years ago, would anyone have thought it would be acceptable to let she males in little girls rest rooms?

Leftists are going to be boohooing about how mean we are to kid touchers who were born a certain way and can't help it. It will happen because leftists are degenerate vermin.