Listen up, shitheel. Don't think for one minute that your flowery rhetoric and BS jargon is going to put a positive spin on what you've done.
You killed children. Dozens of them. In cold blood. It was premeditated. You only stopped once YOUR life was in danger from the police.
"strong enough to suffer on", eh? Tell that to the parents of the children you murdered. They had to bury their sons and daughters because of your self-serving bullshit. You get to "suffer on" in relative comfort. They will never heal. You can fuck right off with that shit.
As for "self-terminating," why the fuck can't you just say "committing suicide"? Oh, wait--I get it. Suicide is for common people, but you aren't common. You're a White Knight of the Fraternal Order of Fuckwits, or whatever the fuck it is you dream that you are.
You know what? Never mind; you can call it whatever you want; seppuku, self-termination, ritual suicide, kicking the oxygen habit, meeting oblivion, whatever--just fucking do it already.