Blondie_brownie #fundie reddit.com

(Women unhappy with husband's recent red pill behavior, wanted equal relationship. Women later decided to divorce in an update.)

First of all, no one went to your husband and forced the red pill down his throat, so there's no need to thank us for that. He went looking for marriage advice because he wasn't happy with the way things were in your marriage together. You need to take a good hard look at your marriage and ask yourself why he could possibly be unhappy. Then, you need to sit him down and ask him why he's unhappy and why he wants you to be submissive and why he wants to "break you" (what does that even mean?). What exactly does he want from his relationship with you and what can you do to give it to him? You need to ask him to be specific and you need to be quiet while he speaks (unless it's to ask him to clarify something) so you can fully comprehend what he is telling you. Why does he want to be in charge? Why does he want to be in control? Do you love him and trust him enough to give him what he wants and needs to be happy in your marriage? if the answer is no, you do not trust him and no, you do not love him enough to give him this, then just divorce. Right now, just end it.

If you actually want to save your marriage, then, after that talk with him where you actually hear what he is asking you to do, you try to do it. He wants you to stop questioning his decisions? For the sake of your marriage, you keep negative comments to yourself. He wants you to be submissive in the bedroom? For the sake of your marriage, you let him toss you around. He wants to decide where to go and what to do? For the sake of your marriage, you go and do those things with a smile. Give it an honest-to-goodness try for a month, then sit him down and re-evaluate. Are you now giving him what he wants? If no, ask him what to do differently. If yes, can you be the wife he wants you to be after a month of living it?

I found TRP after I had just gotten out of an "equal" relationship that I was completely unhappy in. A few months later, as I was still swallowing that sometimes-bitter pill, I met my husband. He was pretty naturally alpha, but I introduced him to TRP forums and Married Man Sex Life. It took us a long time, trying (100% trying, not half-assed trying) new techniques and different things, working on our communication, to come to the point we're at today; with him as captain and me as first mate. It took me a very long time to come to trust him and his actions and his decisions. But I trust myself and I know I married a good man. I am not my husband's underling or slave. We work together to further our mutual and individual goals; generally, he handles the big picture and I handle the details. That's how we work, it's absolutely perfect for us. If you truly and deeply want to save your marriage, instead of blaming us or your husband, take a long, hard look at what is actually going on and make an effort to fix it.

31 comments

Confused?

So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!

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