Waiting4Jesus #fundie

Waiting4Jesus #fundie rr-bb.com

(Waiting4Jesus bought a "Jesus Freak" T-shirt)

Okay, then I went into a McDonald's and that's when it dawned on me just how SUPERB an "evangelizing tool" this t-shirt is, particularly for the faint-of-heart, shy crowd. As I was walking out the door after my meal, some woman sitting in a booth said. "Ooooh, so you're a Jesus Freak, huh?" I grinned broadly and said, "Yes."

Then I guess the Holy Spirit took hold of my tongue because COMPLETELY w/o warning, didn't even KNOW I was gonna say it beforehand, I just said, "Do you know that Jesus is coming back very soon?"

And we struck up a brief conversation. It was brief because I was "preaching to the choir," she said she already KNEW Jesus is coming soon.

I was soooooooo encouraged by this!!! It was just as easy as pie! The t-shirt "speaks" FOR you, so that others will approach YOU instead of YOU approaching them.

For all you shy folks, I urge you to get one!!!!!!!! It's amazing! The time is short and we need to spread the word!! I got mine at Books-a-Million but I am sure there are many places online where you could get one, if interested.

I came home feeling totally exhilarated that I had the guts to tell someone He is coming (instead of just plastering SIGNS everywhere & on my car, LOL). It felt incredibly good, intoxicating even, for speaking out to be THAT EASY & NATURAL.

66 comments

old comment by Horsefeathers

"Okay, then I went into a McDonald's and that's when it dawned on me just how SUPERB an "evangelizing tool" this t-shirt is, particularly for the faint-of-heart, shy crowd."

You're a special kind of lack-wit if you think that.

"As I was walking out the door after my meal, some woman sitting in a booth said. "Ooooh, so you're a Jesus Freak, huh?" I grinned broadly and said, "Yes.""

Don't you mean, "I gripped my Happy Meal toy tightly, wiped the drool from my chin, grinned like a damned fool and said, 'Yeah!' whilst striking a triumphant pose"?

"Then I guess the Holy Spirit took hold of my tongue because COMPLETELY w/o warning, didn't even KNOW I was gonna say it beforehand, I just said, "Do you know that Jesus is coming back very soon?""

You know, saying or doing things you're not consciously in control of is generally considered a sign of serious mental illness.

Unless you're on Rapture Ready where it's a badge of honor.

"And we struck up a brief conversation. It was brief because I was "preaching to the choir," she said she already KNEW Jesus is coming soon."

Exactly what I would have said to get such an obviously disturbed individual to leave me alone.

"I was soooooooo encouraged by this!!! It was just as easy as pie! The t-shirt "speaks" FOR you, so that others will approach YOU instead of YOU approaching them."

Uh huh. And the first time someone points out what a moron you look like you'll be able to run back to Rapture Ready and claim you were "persecuted" for your faith.

I swear you people bring shit on yourself just for that reason.

"For all you shy folks, I urge you to get one!!!!!!!! It's amazing!"

You keep using those exclamation points and you'll end up putting your eye out.

"The time is short and we need to spread the word!!

Yes, you may only have another couple of millennia to go. Best hurry out and spread your psychobabble to the masses.

"I got mine at Books-a-Million but I am sure there are many places online where you could get one, if interested."

I could go to CafePress.com and create a shirt, but I don't think you'd like what it says...

"I came home feeling totally exhilarated that I had the guts to tell someone He is coming (instead of just plastering SIGNS everywhere & on my car, LOL)."

Here's an idea: try telling someone that doesn't agree with you. See how you feel then.

"It felt incredibly good, intoxicating even, for speaking out to be THAT EASY & NATURAL."

You didn't speak out. You wore a pretentious fucking t-shirt, found someone who already agreed with you and then deluded yourself into thinking you've made some sort of difference.

old comment by Tolpuddle Martyr

Excerpt of conversation between Waiting4Jesus and some terrified young woman in McDonald's

Young woman: "Ooooh, so you're a Jesus Freak, huh?"

Waiting4Jesus (smiling insanely): "YES!"

Young woman (backing away slowly): "Oooh kay, I gotta bus to catch..."

Waiting4Jesus (still smiling insanely):"Do you know that Jesus is coming back very soon?"

Young woman (inching towards the door): “I have a dental appointment, a job interview, I’m late for work...”

Waiting4Jesus (screaming and waving arms wildly): "The Lawd is come back amongst us, the rapture is soon, the righteous shall watch as the wicked are cast into the lake of fire where they will writhe in agony. The abortionists, the gays, the liberals all will burn, hellfire, burn!!!"

Young woman (flees).

Amazing what a T shirt can do.

old comment by moose

This story reminds me of one. A shopkeeper has a religious store. Sells books, babbles, T SHIRTS (this is what reminded me...) all sorts of xian paraphenalia. Every year, leading up to xmas, his store sells out as xians are busy buying all their gifts and xian decorations for xmas. On xmas morning, all the xians sing "what a friend we have in jeebus" and continue their daily routine of working after getting one day off for xmas. However, on xmas eve the jewish shopkeeper and his family close up the store for the year...emptied of all the inventory right at xmas time. Before they leave they sing "what a friend we have in jeebus" then lock the door and go on a 2 week skiing vacation.
So......I wonder if the store owner that sold the "Jeebus Freak" T shirt was jewish????? Or perhaps even an atheist....laughing his way to the bank??????