Like a new flower garden which slowly evolves from a bed of plain green shoots to a lush display of colorful blooms, God wants your relationship with Him to be in a continuous state of transformation. There is so much He wants to teach you about who He is and who He designed you to be. It has always been about YOU and Him. Your children—as wonderful as they were—simply have no role in your personal relationship with God. It’s not you, God, and the people you love the most on earth. It’s just you and God. This is an intimate marriage—a private love affair filled with bedroom secrets that will never be shared with anyone else. By stripping away a relationship that was very close and dear to you, God makes room for your personal bond with Him to thrive. Even the best, most wonderful gifts in life can get in the way of our own journey with God. When He takes a child, He is saying that at this point in your personal walk with Him, it is better for that soul and you to move apart from each other and continue on in separate directions. Are you willing to trust His judgment?

God loves you infinitely more than you loved your child. Your pain is most serious to Him. He will not spend such costly tears on something trivial. Are you willing to believe Him when He says this was a necessary thing? Are you willing to believe that this new, heartbreaking road He has forced you down really will lead to a far better place than the road you were on before? EVERYTHING God puts you through is for your long-term spiritual BEST. Of course the death of a child feels terribly unnecessary and useless—especially when the circumstances of death seem like some random accident that wasn’t supposed to happen. Yet there are no accidents in God’s universe—only very intentional choices and carefully controlled events.