Atheist:
How do you explain the reference to four-legged flying creeping things in the bible?
Lonny:
I am looking possibly there was an animal with four legs that did fly but through time and being told we can't eat them the Athiest ate all the four legged creapy things because they where told not to.
71 comments
Four-legged flying creeping things...huh. I suppose it works fine if you pull off two of the legs.
Atheism was almost unheard of back then. It is a far more recent movement. No one would have eaten all the four-legged flying creeping things just because they were told not to. Atheism is when one acts not in opposition to religion, but completely without any regard for it.
A poe?
Anyway, the dumbest shit I've heard this week. "There's no four-legged flying creeping things anyymore since the atheist ate them all because they were told not to by God, and we all know how much they like disobedience."
Shit, this is dumb!
Yeah, sorry. We ate them all. And they were DELICIOUS. :P
Hey Lonny, would you like to join us for a unicorn barbecue next Saturday? It'll be great! We'll even give you the horn- it's the best part!
(#939892)
Was that before or after the troll was summoned?
Considering that the six-legged ones exceed the total weight of the entire rest of the animal kingdom, it seems pretty unlikely that humans could cause the extinction of four-legged insects, if they ever existed, simply by eating them. Plus, if that were true, why didn't the atheists eat all the pigs and shrimp? They were forbidden by the OT, too.
Actually, Satan, that Master of Mischief, that MC of Misery, sent all his minions scurrying about super-gluing two extra legs on every insect ever born, just to fuck with you Fundies. Even now, they hang about the swamps with a large assortment of tiny legs and microscopic glue guns... and that's why swamps smell bad little Loony, er, Lonny.
Sorry. I really shouldn't write things after my head explodes.
"there was an animal with four legs that did fly"
That part is correct, if he's referring to bats. You know, them mammals what the Buybull classifies as birds.
I've buyed some pink unicorn filet, something about three pounds in weight (bargain sale).
Problem: I'm lacking cooking recipes. Any suggestions out there?
MfG
I must say, this is pretty creative. Lonny is either a clever Poe or a guy with the mind of a three year old. Either way, this is probably one of my favorite pieces of Christian apologetics I have ever seen.
I am looking at the very distinct possibility, the very, very likely possibility, that Lonny is a moron.
Brilliant. Well done Lonny. We definitely need more of your fantastic insights. Truly are you blessed with the ability to explain things to the common man.
The man is a font of wisdom. We need more of him here. Besides which, it's absolutely hilarious. It is a perfect example of the power of the Lord to inspire His followers and imbue them with sniggeroids.
So wait. We ate all the pegasi, gryphons, dragons and hippogriffs to death because we weren't divinely commanded not to? Well, what about you Christians fucking up the Earth despite being told in your Bible to take stewardship of it?
Fucking moron.
Yup, you got it. Clearly, since reality must warp itself to make the Bible right, there WERE four legged winged flying, creeping things, and cud chewing rabbits, and...purely unprovoked, just to spite God, oh glory hallelujah...the atheists ate ALL those critters into extinction.
Because that makes FAR more sense.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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