A proposition for homosexuals

Greetings,

We want the word gay returned to us. It's a perfectly fine word but it can no longer be used as intended, because of you. Our children cannot enjoy singing along with the theme to The Flintstones, as we used to do, without mumbling in shame or laughing out loud at that part of the lyrics. In American History classes, teachers can never discuss "The Gay Nineties" without adding an awkward, distracting caveat.

In exchange, we offer you the full, free and exclusive use of festive. Even though we know it doesn't really fit you any better than gay, we never use it so it's just sitting around gathering dust. As a bonus, we'll throw in flamboyant and fabulous, which you've already annexed anyway.

Please consider this offer. Thanks.

Sincerely,

At least 98% of the world's population