My step-daughter loves [Twilight]. Unfortunately, I have seen more and more evil in her life since she read the first book. I almost started reading it the other day so I could help counsel teens troubled by the themes in this book, but I could not even pick it up due to the evil spirit exuding from the picture on the cover.
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Dude, it's just a book about a guy that says he's a vampire but is really an emo wussy. Get over it.
I, personally, don't even like the vampire romance genre because it turns one of my favorite monsters emo, but hey, let her read it if it is her thing.
I could not even pick it up due to the evil spirit exuding from the picture on the cover.
It's a fucking book, dammit. You're not going to get cooties if you touch it.
FFS, it's an emo-story that caters to young women much like Tom Clancy appeals to a lot of guys. Get over it...
That said, my little sister is into it. Tried explaining it, but I think the premise is just stupid...
...I could not even pick it up due to the evil spirit exuding from the picture on the cover.
Have you surrounded your copy of the Necronomicon Unaussprechlichen Kulten Twilight with a pentacle made of salt and purified the whole area with a wind spell?
Hey, come on now, I'm pretty sure we ALL knew that these guys were repelled from literature long before taxmomma...texmomoff...whomever came along.
I mean, let's be serious, I'd be surprised if these people touched ANY printed source other than the babble
This is why fundies hate Twilight:
Vampires = Sex (Come on dude, the seduction and the blood sucking and the only biting hot young ladies and then they become raging nymphos too? Yeah, you try to tell me that's not what they represent.)
Sparkly Mormon Boy Vampires = Chaste Young Fundiespawn Repressed Girls Crushing
Young Girl Crushing --> Hoshit, They Have Libidos
Female Sexuality = Fundie's Greatest Fear
If someone loves Twilight I'd say they need some help, but... Evil spirits don't factor into it.
Seriously, she was afraid of a picture on a book? Unless you're two, that is just sad.
I have been waiting for the fundies to come out against Twilight, I ask once more why they only do so AFTER its been adapted to film, these books have been out for three years, without so much as a peep. Yeah way to stay on the ball...
@ Sayna - best reasoning yet.
Ah well, at least they are leaving Harry Potter and His Dark Materials alone for now!
Ya know what these folks remind me of? "D&D Pagans". I am an atheist, but I hold a lot of pagan ceremonies because of my love of ritual. I don't believe in spirits or goddesses other than what you create inside yourself and I sure don't believe in an afterlife. When I was a teenager there were all kinds of kids in that scene who thought they were casting spells, opening gates, being possessed. It's all mumbo jumbo spooky language bullshit no matter what flavor. Just looks like these christians have embraced it even further.
I INVENTED ELECTRICITY!!! BENJAMIN FRANKLIN IS THE DEBBIL!!!
...IT'S A FREAKING BOOK!!! No "evil" exudes from the picture on the cover.
Truth be known, she's secretly wanting to read the book herself while using the guise of " I could help counsel teens troubled by the themes in this book".
So your Strength in the Lord is too feeble to overcome the power of a paperback book cover?
You need a spiritual Charles Atlas Programme! Now every seven-stone spiritual wimp can have awesome etheric muscles in only twenty minutes exercise a day!
I almost started reading it the other day so I could help counsel teens troubled by the themes in this book, but I could not even pick it up due to the evil spirit exuding from the picture on the cover.
Translation
I wanted to read it to see if I would be as aroused as my step daughter obviously was ,but I was frightened someone would catch me reading it.
Formula for the Exorcism of Evil Spirits Hiding in Book Illustrations:
First, pick up book carefully using forceps, pliers, or corn tongs.
Soak in bucket of water for 2-3 hours.
Still using tongs, etc., place in 350 degree oven and bake until dry.
Poke with stick.
Using stick, prod from oven rack into ordinary brown paper grocery bag. Any appropriate size will do.
Close top of bag and grasp firmly in right hand.
While holding bag, run into the street in front of your house, swing the bag over your head and scream like a chicken until someone sedates you and takes you away.
Hahaha, Raptards are afraid of everything.
"I wanted to buy stamps at the store today, but they had pictures of cats on them and we all know that cats are owned by WICTHES!"
Wait your country is in a GODDAMN WAR over GODDAMN LIES and has killed GODDAMN THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE and you are worried about a GODDAMN NON EXISTENT MYTHICAL ENTITY?
Wow, you need to get your priorities right. If the most evil you have seen involve vampires not a lying, torturing, stealing, murdering government...
@FMG: Well, obviously you just don't understand how important this is. I mean, tweener fiction (written by MORMONS) could usher in the Apocalyse, doncha know.
"My step-daughter loves [Twilight]. Unfortunately, I have seen more and more evil in her life since she read the first book. I almost started reading it the other day so I could help counsel teens troubled by the themes in this book, but I could not even pick it up due to the evil spirit exuding from the picture on the cover."
Burn it. It's the fundy thing to do.
Twilight? Evil? You gotta be kidding me! It's a fucking romance novel that involves a human and a vampire. A ROMANCE NOVEL. The apple is not evil. The first cover represents the forbidden fruit. Could also represent supposely forbidden love.
Your daughter needs to see the other vampires. The traditional ones. I prefer Dracula and Lestat, Lestat was sort of the hybrid of a traditional vampire and a romantic vampire. (sorta romantic) (Anne Rice is now Christian. Man, I bet her books lost their touch now. She even made Lestat a Christian vampire...;; Lestat lost his charm after that.)
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Poorly written and insipid, yes. Evil, no. But whatever, you're funny as hell.
I attempted to read it, also, and couldn't do it, either.
I wasn't afraid. I just found it to be sexist, stupid, pathetically badly written crap.
This is the book that restored my faith in human love.
THen subsequently destroyed it in New Moon.
Then put it back together in Eclipse.
Then proved my point about vampire children in Breaking Dawn.
Yes, your step-daughter should only read wholesome material.
First, have her read the Song of Solomon. Don't worry, its in the bible, so you can rest assured that there's nothing "naughty" in it. Then she should read about David in I and II Kings. David was a biblical hero, so surely the way he treated women had to be god approved. And let's finish her lesson in the joy of biblical literature with a thorough reading of The Revelation.
Yes sir, no modern rubbish can compete with the bible when in comes to showing kids the right path.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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