www.64.71.77.248

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

My Earthly Father’s House

As I continued forward, I saw many whom I knew within the crowd. Some were relatives who had died in years past. My earthly father was among them. But my eyes and attention were upon Him to whom I was going. I thought of Psalm 45:10—11: “Forget your people and your father’s house; then the King will desire your beauty.” I did feel that I was being transferred from my earthly father’s house to the abode of my Husband.

Also among those gathered were the angels assigned to me. Some I knew. Some I did not know. But I could tell that these were angels assigned to help me because they were smiling broadly.

My Father’s House

As I neared the little house of light created by my Father’s hands, I wanted to share my consent. I wanted to say, “Yes, yes, I agree,” to all three members of the Trinity. I felt as light as a wisp of air. I was a cornucopia of joy.

Jesus smiled at me as I passed one of the manifestations of the Holy Spirit stationed around the perimeter of my Father’s canopy.

My Assent

As I stepped beneath the canopy, I could contain my joy no longer. I began to walk through an acceptance. The movements were like a stately dance.

I circled Jesus three times, one encircling for each member of the Trinity. As I weaved gently between the mighty torches of the Holy Spirit, I overflowed with love for all Three.

Like Rebekah, I wanted to say, “I will go with this Man.” I began to sing a new song.

Song of the Bride

Hear, Thou great Redeemer blessed,
Deep within my heart find rest;
You who birthed me from Your side,
Then called me forth to be Your bride.
I exult in You alone,
And take Your heart to be my home.
Lover, Friend, Redeemer, Son,
Eternal Husband, make us one.

A Private Moment

When the third circuit had been completed, I took my place at the right of Jesus. I had publicly given my consent before a multitude of witnesses.

He looked deeply into my eyes and spoke privately to me:

Set Me as a seal upon your heart,

As a signet ring upon your finger.

Under His Covering

Gently a tallith settled over our heads. Jesus spoke again, this time in a manner that would bear public witness to all:

I betroth you to Me forever.

I betroth you to Me in righteousness and in Justice,

In loving-kindness and in compassion,

I betroth you to Me in faithfulness—and you will know God.

A Ring More Precious Than Gold

Then lifting my veil slightly, He took my right hand into both of His. He held my right index finger encased within His right hand as He spoke:

Behold, you are consecrated to Me.

A golden light encompassed my right index finger. From my finger the light spread over my whole being.

My Father’s hands of light became a brilliant cocoon. Besides Jesus, the only other one I could see was the Holy Spirit manifested in flaming towers. The light became more and more intense. I saw two white eagles cart wheeling.

Mahanaim

Then slowly, as in a ritual dance of birds, I felt suspended within the dazzling light and fire. It was as though Jesus and I began a stylized, courtship dance. I felt that I was vapor that could be inhaled, vapor that could be carried into fire and light.

This was light that could be breathed. It was light that was alive. It went through me as if I was not there at all. I became one with the light—in a dance with it. It was as though within the light and fire, I too became light and fire.

We were vaporous—blending, circling, homogenized yet distinct, fused but separate. The two became entirely one, then separate again.

Although this dance began slowly, it accelerated to a lightning speed. The dance was lightning—lightning, fire, and light, glorious in the extreme.

Lullaby to Creation

Then, as if in some suspended silence, I began to hear my Father sing. It was creative sound, a lullaby from the heart of Him who sings to His creation, from Him who holds all things together by the word of His power.

He had given the universe its sounds so that all might sing back to Him. In this rare, suspended silence, I could hear that singular sound released from all creation. From deep within Himself, our God, like a father rocking his child, sang lovingly to His universe.

I sensed the perfect unity within the Godhead, their harmony. By being brought into the Godhead, I began to experience their unity. I shared in their oneness. Jesus was giving me the desires of my heart. As He had sworn, in greater measure I began to “know God.”

Return to the Ceremony

From this suspended place, I became conscious again of the ceremony. My Father’s canopied hands, the seven torches of fire, Jesus, the attendants, the angels, and the redeemed all came back into focus. I was once again under the canopy with Jesus.

A jubilant shout came from those assembled. Together they proclaimed:

Consecrated!

Celebration

The throne room erupted into celebration. Dancers began careening past us, reaching out to wish us well. Jesus touched hand after hand. I was smiling but somewhat dazed.

Jesus looked over at me.

Then speaking with affection to those who were reaching toward us, He said, “Please excuse us.”

Smiling, He took my hand and said, “Come.”

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

To Nest Above

“Your feathers are white now, My eagle,” He said. “You are ready to nest above.”
He waved His hand to allow me to see an ivory palace on a high mountain.

“This is yours, if you want it,” He said.

“It is very beautiful, Father,” I said slowly, not wishing to seem ungrateful. “But,” I smiled wistfully, “I would never be there. I would always be away from home because I would want to be near You. You are my home, Daddy, just as You are my Beloved’s home. It has taken me a great deal of time to realize this. But now I know that there is nothing on Earth or in heaven that I desire. I want only my Father. I want Jesus. I want my friend, the Holy Spirit. If I may live where I would be the happiest, allow me to live amid the coals of fire within You. Let me be a pillar in the temple of my God, never to go out again.”

My Father gave a small cry of pure joy. “You have chosen,” He said.

Aloes

Suddenly, there was a release of the fragrance of aloes. I knew that aloes meant “little tents” (so named for the intimacy of the bridal tent/chamber). I too had chosen intimacy. I had chosen nearness to my God.

I breathed in the fragrance. So did my Father. It was satisfying.

The Crown

My Father continued, “Anna, My child, you will need to borrow your crown for the ceremony. You will wear it for this special occasion. But it will not be placed into your hands until your service on Earth is completed.”

A crown of gold came from my heavenly Father. He held it higher than my eye level. The crown had two gems. The large emerald that my Father had given me was in the center. The slightly smaller emerald given to me by Jesus was on the side. There were golden sockets for other jewels. No other gemstones were present at this time, however.

He continued, “I have added to your crown twenty-four sapphires.” These immediately appeared, encircling the large emerald on the front.

“Thank You, Daddy,” I said. I wondered how I merited these gems.

My Father answered my thoughts. “You cannot earn the uncreated,” He said. “But you can grow up [into Christ] to manifest the uncreated. Something borrowed,” He added, “something blue.”

The Attendants

My Father continued, “Twenty-four stars attend this crown. They will bring to you the covenant garment, your crown, and your veil. These will dress you and attend you at the ceremony.”

I saw that the crown had twenty-four points around the top. I wondered if there was some connection between the points of the crown and the angelic attendants. But He did not give an explanation.

“Is there something that I need to do, Daddy?” I asked.

He answered, “Sleep with henna on the palms of your hands and the soles of your feet as an outward sign [of an inner grace]. My Son is coming,” He said. “Be ready.”

Twenty-four angels that looked like young women appeared on the sea of glass. They were dressed in white. My Father handed to them the crown, the covenant garment, and the veil. The gown and veil also came from His own person.

“My child,” the Father continued, “you have My blessing.” His glory came from Him and kissed my forehead.

“Thank You, Daddy,” I said.

He picked me up and placed me in front of the twenty-four angels. “Go with your attendants,” He said.

We all bowed. Then the angels parted to allow me to pass through their number. They escorted me from the throne room.

Instantly we were walking across the meadow in the Garden of God.

Henna

We walked to the tree of life. I was silent. I did not feel like talking. The angels were silent also. A very important event lay before me. But I did not know what it was or even how it would look.

Once we reached the trunk of the tree, the attendants busied themselves applying henna paste to the palms of my hands and the soles of my feet. The air hung heavy with the smell of the spice.

I held on to the tree that was strangely warm. I did not watch the angels because I was nervous, distracted.

Wishing to encourage me, one of the angels said, “Henna is the last of the spices.” It faintly registered with me that I had been carried through Esther’s preparations.’

When the statement did break through to my consciousness, I thought, “How right that I should enter the kingdom through the shed blood of Jesus, and now before this important event, an outward sign should be placed upon me.” Within myself, I thanked the Lord for forgiving me. Then I continued aloud, “I ask for forgiveness for any sin that I have committed, and I forgive everyone for sins committed against me.” I looked at the angels, “It says in the Word to confess your sins to one another.” The angels looked bewildered. Then I realized that angels do not confess to one another. I changed the subject. “Does anyone know what I am to do here at the tree of life?”

Rest

“Rest,” one angel said. “You have experienced much.”

I laughed wearily. “Yes,” I affirmed. “But I am very excited and nervous.”

“Resting in the tree of life will strengthen you,” another added. “We will lift you into its branches,” said another. Before I could think about it, they lifted me. They began carrying me upward. It seemed as though the tree accommodated us, for we struck no branches.

High in the tree, they lay me in a juncture that cradled me. It was very comforting to rest in its branches.

“We will return when you have rested,” an attendant said. “Thank you,” I smiled at them.

They were gone.

I lay there looking up into the branches of the tree, thinking of my Lover, my Friend. The soft lights of the leaves and fruit soothed me. I did not think I could rest. But I did.

Before falling asleep, I lifted my hands to look at them again. I spoke quietly, “O my Beloved, what is going to happen?”

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

Jesus held me at arm’s length, studying my face. He smiled, turned, and led the way toward the building.

The atmosphere in the valley was red as though the building was catching the light from a distant forest fire. It was eerie. It cast long shadows across the valley.

The shadows traveled up the building until they reached two enormous black marble dragons on top. These dragons were facing each other with their wings uplifted and touching like the cherubim over the mercy seat.

The building was a mockery of the ark of the covenant. It was deathly dark as if it were made from antimatter. The black marble exterior was wet, and the overbearing humidity made it difficult to breathe.

Shadow Warriors

Thousands of soldiers were standing shoulder to shoulder on all four sides of the building. They wore an ancient style of armor whose design I had never seen. These warriors were camped around the building, just as the Levites were instructed to camp around the desert tabernacle. None of them moved when we passed through their numbers, however.

“Why?” I wondered. I glanced down their ranks to see if I could discern the reason for their inaction. The faces within the helmets were shadow. But their eyes tracked us.

I suddenly remembered how the two angels that were sent to rescue Lot had temporarily blinded the men of Sodom. Jesus, I thought, must have rendered these demons inert. They were alert. But they were incapable of action. They held their ranks like clay soldiers buried with early Chinese emperors.

The Approach

After passing through most of the ranks of the soldiers, Jesus approached the building. The structure had the appearance of a gigantic mausoleum. As we drew near, I could see that the black marble dragons were breathing. So were the black marble monkeys that formed a decoration around the top of the building. These leered down at us.

The massive double doors unlatched as we approached. They opened slowly. Each door was of great weight. They pictured satan ’s supposed conquests. They were executed in bronze relief and were similar to the doors of European cathedrals that often depict the life of Christ.

Within

The doors opened outwardly to give us entry to a large, windowless room. The smell within the room was odious. The room, like the valley, seemed lit by distant fires. My eyes traveled up to a heavy raised cornice. It formed a crown around the top of the room. A text was written upon it in an ancient language of wedges and triangles.

Jesus waved His hand, and the lettering changed so that I was able to read the inscription. The text proclaimed satan ’s five “I wills” with which he intended to vault himself above the throne of God and crown himself king of the universe. I shuddered.

Hanging upside down from this cornice were half-female, half-batlike demons—the Lilith, the vampire demons that hunt at night. They were repugnant. I dropped my gaze and saw the reason for the stench in the room. Bat guano.

On Display

Display tables flanked either side of the room. These were covered with what seemed to be black velvet. The objects on display were shining with light from within. The objects were beautiful, not because of exquisite workmanship nor because they were encrusted with jewels. Instead, they seemed to have some beauty bestowed upon them by God. They were His, for His people had used them. Now they sat on display like war mementos. I quickly glanced over the tables in astonishment. This was a trophy room.

Stolen From God

Each article was labeled with a clay marker. The same wedges and triangular-shaped writing was on these markers as was on the cornice. Again, Jesus waved His hand. The language changed so that I could read the labels.

On display were the just measure, Miriam’s tambourine, Bezalel’s renderings for the workers (of the patterns given to Moses on the mount), the widow’s bowl, various musical instruments of ancient design, and on and on. We passed article after article that had been used by God in some extraordinary way and then stolen from Him. I could only suppose that these had been taken into the enemy camp because of the sins of God’s people.

I was heartened, however, by the empty spaces on the tables. The labels showed articles that apparently had been rescued to be used by God’s people again. Goliath’s sword that was used by David was missing. David’s harp had been retrieved. There was an empty space where once a banner had been displayed. As we neared the rear of the trophy room, I saw a white embroidered robe on a black clothes stand. It was luminescent. satan had displayed it by itself, as if it were a prized acquisition.

The Fresco

Beyond this article on the rear wall was a vivid fresco.” Before the fresco burned black candles. The flickering lights from the candles seemed to give the fresco a life of its own.

The fresco began at its base with recounting after recounting of brutal tortures of some of God’s people. Those being tortured still seemed alive. The fresco was like none I had ever seen. It was similar to a hologram. Light from the candles caused the pictures to have progressive action, so that those suffering suffered again, with satan supposedly gaining the victory again and again. Barbarous.

The Throne of Skulls

My eyes traveled up this mountain of slaughter to about one-third of the way to the ceiling. Here the fresco began to depict a mound of skulls. This mound rose to a throne of skulls upon which sat the goat-like legs of a satyr.

The enthroned creature had the torso and arms of a human but the head and horns of a goat. In this goat/man's left hand was held a picture of the world. In his other hand was the location for two keys. The outline of the keys was still there, but the keys of death and of Hades had been removed from his hand.

The fresco vaulted up until it covered the first half of the ceiling like a frightful canopy. It was satan , goatlike, enthroned upon a mountainous pile of human skulls. He was gloating in sinister splendor. As God the Father is enthroned upon the praises of His people, satan is enthroned upon his murderous savageries and sadistic cruelties.

A chill ran through me. Flickering light from the black candles caused satan ’s face to move, seemingly to change before my eyes. His snake-like eyes glared at me.

The Embroidered Robe

Jesus touched my shoulder. I flinched. We began to walk toward the acquisition at the very back—the embroidered robe.

It was fall length with long sleeves. The design of the garment was simple. A man or woman could have worn it. Its richness lay in the embroidered work that was executed in white gold of exceptional purity The embroidery arose from the robe. The pattern was intricate and exceptionally beautiful. As I moved a little before the garment, all the colors within the radiance of the Father seemed to play across its surface.

The weight and thickness of the various gold threads seemed to symbolize attributes of the Lord. The robe reflected these as if they had been woven into the garment.

The Embroidery

I had no idea a garment could communicate that which was of the character of Christ. Still, I wanted to move slightly before the embroidery to ascertain what was woven into the fabric.

I received the impression of “a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” The garment also reflected “bearing with one another” and “forgiving each other.”’ The thread that had the greatest weight and was the most frequently used was “love.”

These were part of the character of Christ that Paul enumerated in Colossians 3:12—14. He had told the body of Christ alive at that time to “put on” this garment. If he had told them to put it on, they must have had it in their possession but were not wearing it. I gathered that sin had eventually allowed the garment to be taken from God’s children. Sad. We had great need of it.

Jesus spoke to me quietly. “The garment is for the soul and heart. It is an inner garment that becomes visible through actions, through decisions that effect unity [oneness in Christ].”

He continued, “I am the new, inner garment—others rather than self. The supreme Other is God [the Father] Himself—His rights, His needs, and His desires before all. I have purchased you for our Father. I have washed you and clothed you with garments of holiness and beauty, garments of salvation and righteousness. Anna, clothe yourself in Me—garments of salvation for the whole person [body, soul, heart, and spirit]. Clothe yourself in Me—attributes of righteousness that are beautiful to God [the Father].”

I turned back to look at the robe. It was exquisite. The Lord’s virtues woven into the garment had brought the body of Christ into “the perfect bond of unity.” Paul had said this. How we needed it now.

He continued, “The embroidered garment is to be worn by those who are the bride. It was handed down in our family. Those who were entering into fuller union with Me wore it. There is none like it. It belongs to our household.”

As I looked at the robe, I realized that to enter into a deeper relationship with Christ meant to enter into a deeper covenant with His body. The two are inseparable.

The Recovery

“Carefully listen to Me,” Jesus said softly. “I want you to remove the garment, then quickly climb onto My back.” Without hesitation He placed His hand on the top of the velvet clothes rack.

I did not have time to think. Instantly I obeyed and began to remove the robe. The more I disengaged the garment, the harder He pressed on the top of the rack. I supposed He was compensating for some weight of glory in it. He continued to press on the top of the rack as I folded the embroidered robe so that it could be carried.

When the garment had been secured, I looked at Jesus. He gave the flicker of a smile, winked at me, and then removed His hand from the rack.

The Escape

Screams, sirens, and alarms of all kinds immediately arose together. All restraints were removed from everything within this realm.

Quickly the Lord became the white Eagle. Nervously I scrambled onto His back.

The vampire bat demons unfolded their huge wings. Their eyes were bloodred. They hissed through their fanged mouths. They were deranged with fury.

The doors to the front of the trophy room began to close. The white Eagle had to fly with His wings perpendicular to the floor to pass through the narrow opening. I tightened my arms and legs around Him, pressing the robe between my flattened body and His back. We passed through the opening like a single unit. With searing screams everything—bats, monkeys, dragons, soldiers—wrenched awake.

It seemed as though everything in the corrupted stratum breathed down upon us in the chase—screeching, squalling, shrieking, a cacophony of blood-curdling sounds raised behind us. They were a frenzied juggernaut.

The marble dragons wrenched free from the top of the building with all the cracking and tearing that accompany a structure being torn apart. The black marble monkeys violently ripped free to join in the hunt. The Lilith and shadow warriors rabidly pursued. Whether hoofed, winged, clawed, flightless, or airborne, they pressed us. They were a murderous horde of frenzy and rage.

Quickly demons from elsewhere in the second heaven joined these in the chase. The whole second heaven sounded like one dangerous, wounded animal. The bone-chilling cries that went up from that place made my blood run cold. Horrific.

I clung to the white Eagle. It was a wild ride. Wild! … but exhilarating. I threw back my head, gulping air and laughing silently. Let them roar. That was all that it was, a roar. A show. I was with Jesus, and Jesus had won the victory! Let them roar!

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

When halfway to the tree, the Lord materialized before my eyes. He stood before me beaten, bruised, His garments stuck to His wounds that were still open, gouges in His skull, swollen fingers, and swollen face.

I cried out in alarm. I did not know what to do or how to help. I was in shock. I sank to my knees, for all the strength left me. My hands covered my face.

“Anna,” He said, “this is your Husband, too. I still bear wounds from the faithless in the world.”

I could not look at Him.

“It is all right, Anna,” He said. “It is all right.” He took both of my hands into His and helped me to rise. “Look at Mc, Anna,” He continued. He had changed and now looked as I usually see Him. “I am both—what you see and what you saw. You need to know that you are marrying into both, one but both.”

“I do not know what to say,” I whispered.

“Say nothing,” He said. “What is there to say? But you need to know Me as both so that you do not wed blindly.”

“What does this mean?” I asked.

“Those who are one share all,” He said. “You wish to drink deeply, to share fully, to know even as you are known. This too is part of the knowing, the sharing, the being one. There are not many who turn from their own interests to seek the interests of God.’ But those who are called and chosen to live in God desire to share the sufferings of the Godhead.”

It was as though I was struck dumb.

He continued, “I realize that you are in shock. Therefore I will not ask you now if you are willing to share My sufferings, My sorrows.”

“Lord,” I said, trying to face the reality of what I had seen, “make me willing. I want to be one with You. I would deny You nothing, nor would I turn away from You because there are sorrows to bear—as long as we are together.”

“Do you mean this?” He asked.

“Yes, Lord,” I said.

“Behold,” He exclaimed, turning to face the tree of life and gesturing in its direction.

The Wheel of Fire

A huge, gold ring began to spin before us. It was as tall as the Ferris wheels that are part of the world’s fair exhibitions on Earth. It spun rapidly, bursting into flames.

I realized that the flames were fiery seraphim, hundreds, no thousands, of them. Their flames were as intense as blowtorches. But a figure similar to a man’s was at the core of each torch. Each seraph had six wings. With two they covered their eyes, with two they covered their feet, and with two they flew. A unique and pure music came from their midst.’

“Who will ride the wheel of fire?” the seraphim called. Their voices had a strange sound, as if their words were passing through some medium to which we are not accustomed on Earth.’

I realized I would need a greater spiritual maturity than I now possessed if I would desire to share the burdens of God. I did not know what this would mean. But evidently this fire was a first step if I wished such maturity I turned to Jesus, “I want to ride the wheel, my Lord.”

He smiled. “We will ride it together.”

I called to the seraphim, “We will ride.”

Jesus took my right hand, and we started forward. The closer we came to the wheel, the hotter grew the flames with which it burned. The sound of thousands of blowtorches was formidable. But through the flames I could hear an adoration of God that was of such purity that it startled my senses.

As we arrived at the fiery wheel, a seraph beckoned for us to enter the flames. The seraph spoke to me. “Few wish to ride the ring of fire. They want the ring of gold but not the ring of fire.”

I looked at Jesus. Then holding tightly to His hand, we both entered the fire. It was extremely hot among these flaming seraphim.

A seraph gestured for us to sit down. We did. The wheel began to turn. We went up as if the fiery ring was actually a huge Ferris wheel.

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

Suddenly I heard someone clearing His throat in order to call attention to His presence. I looked up. Jesus was sitting in the large apricot tree. “My Lord,” I said in amazement, “what are You doing up there?”

“I am up a tree, Anna,” He said.

I laughed. “What are You doing up a tree?”

“You want Me up here,” He replied.

“I want You up a tree?” I laughed, for I thought He was joking.

“Yes,” He answered. “I am localized, and you know where I am. You can come to the base of the tree and ask Me questions, and then go about your life. I am in a portion of your heart, but I do not have free access to the whole garden.”

I was cut to the quick. I swallowed hard. “Come down, my Lord,”

I said. “Forgive me. These mysteries are so exciting. . .well, forgive me that...”

“...that you have begun to use Me?” He asked, jumping down from the tree.

“The very thing I have hated, I am doing,” I said.

He walked toward me. “What do you want of Me, Anna? Information? There is a vast supply. Is that what you want?”

“No, of course not,” I replied. “These mysteries are so...”

“...titillating?” He asked.

“Well, they are . .

“...seductive?” He added.

“Yes,” I affirmed.

“But they are part of Me—and you have been given all of Me. It seems a poor exchange.”

“Oh, my Friend,” I continued, “forgive me. I love You and want to be with You. I want You to have access to the entire garden.”

“You are called to know mysteries, Anna, but not to use Me,” He said.

To Still the Soul

I was speechless. When years before I had decided to pursue the Lord earnestly, I withdrew my senses from the overstimulation of worldly input. I felt that I needed to still my soul if I wanted Him to come knocking at my heart.

The withdrawal from keeping myself entertained with the world was exceedingly painful. But now the Lord was saying that I had replaced the worldly with spiritual entertainment—desiring more and more spiritual knowledge—a subtle and less objectionable substitute, but still a substitute for Him. I did not know what to say. I was stunned.

He took me by the arm and guided me gently to the rim of the fountain. “Sit down,” He said quietly. He sat beside me. I looked into His face. The beauty and clearness of those eyes were beyond compare. He took my hand and held it.

A True Friend

“My Anna,” He said, “be a true friend to Me, as I am to you. I want you to desire My company. I am a King, but I desire to be with you, as any lover would long to be with the one he loves. I do not command your love; I humbly ask for t. I do not dictate that you be with Me. I long for you to seek Me. Therefore I wait for you, Anna.”

I dropped my head. “Lord,” I said, “I am selfish. I am using You for my own pleasure.”

Even a King

He lifted my chin. “Anna, look at Me,” He said. “Even a King wishes to be loved for Himself, not for the gifts He bestows.” He smiled at me. “If you do not enjoy being with Me now, why do you believe you will enjoy My company for eternity?” He looked down at my hand. “The pursuer wants to be pursued also,” He said gently.

He looked up and then over to the gate. “Have you ever thought of standing at the entrance to the garden with the gate opened, waiting for Me?”

“No,” I replied.

“You have expected Me to travel the entire distance to you. Do you not think I would be pleased to have you waiting, with part of the distance covered so that we might see each other sooner?”

“Yes,” I said quietly.

He smiled at me. “Come, My love, let us walk.” He helped me to rise and put His arm around my waist. We began to walk the path that circles the garden. “I have called you to Myself;” He said looking down at me. Few understand what this means. Would you like to know, Anna?

“Yes,” I said tentatively. “I say this in fear and trembling because I fear not getting something I want.”

He laughed. “I know this. What does that say about our relationship?”

“It sounds like I do not trust You,” I said. “That is what it sounds like,” He agreed. “Is it true?”

“Yes,” He replied.

“Well, Lord, help me!” I pleaded. “I want to trust You.”

“My wonderful girl,” He said, “My love. Do you not understand? My desire is for you. My passions burn with eternal fires. No mere tear could quench them. It would take the tears from eternity, and still the fire of My passion for you would not be quenched. Why would you not trust the One who loves you as I love?”

I could not answer. I did not know why I did not abandon myself to God. I shook my head. “Who am I to deserve such love?”

“You are chosen for Me by My Father,” He said earnestly “With wisdom that is beyond wisdom, He has chosen you.”

“Then increase my desire to be with You,” I said, “to desire You more than an anointing or spiritual knowledge or...” I could not think fast enough to enumerate. I shook my head in frustration and then blurted out: “I love You.” I clung to Him, burying my face in His chest. “You are the dearest Friend I have.. . love You!”

He placed His arms around me lovingly. “My own,” He said. He dropped His head back and laughed as in pain mixed with joy. Then, bringing His head to mine, He spoke softly, “Anna, Anna.” There was great pain in His voice. “Please do not do this again.” He held me trembling. ‘Anna, do not do this again.”

I had hurt Him deeply by treating Him presumptuously, casually—like someone with whom I had to deal in order to receive that which was my primary interest. But He loved me. He wanted my company and wanted me to desire His. That which is the deepest desire of every human heart was mine, and I was seeking secondary rewards.

My heart began to break. The pain was excruciating. The garden responded also. The smell of myrrh flooded the area. I glanced at the myrrh tree. Red tears of the aromatic gum were slipping from the heart of the wood.’

I pulled back, holding Him at arm’s length, looking into His eyes. “My God, my God,” I said. “I am not worthy of You. I cannot even respond correctly to the depth of Your love. Ishi, if You do not give to me a love that matches Yours in intensity.. .“ The pain in my heart was so severe that I could not finish the sentence.’ With all that was in me I pushed past the extreme pain to cry out, “Oh, please help me to love You as You love me. I am willing, Lord, but I cannot do this myself. You must do this through me! Please!”

Choo Thomas #fundie 64.71.77.248

[Excerpt from Heaven is so Real by Choo Thomas, a book advertised on China's Christian Library but is soon to be taken down due to lack of interest.]

THROUGH A PROPHETIC utterance given by a pastor named Larry Randolph, God spoke directly to me on December 3, 1995. Pastor Randolph prophesied:

I saw the blessing of the Lord in the realm of prophetic ministry and the Lord opening your spirit in a great way to prophetic ministry, dreams and words of knowledge...I saw the Lord speaking to you in the night seasons, between 11 P.M. and 3 A.M....[He will] begin to awaken you and visit you, give you dreams, visions and insight...God told me that you’re one of the daughters that He’s put His Spirit upon to prophesy.

Pastor Randolph spoke these words over me during a special Sunday service at Puget Sound Christian Center in Tacoma, Washington. As he did, the familiar anointing of the Holy Spirit welled up deep in my spirit, and my body began to shiver and quake under the power of God.

I began to weep tears of joy and gratitude as I realized that God had chosen me to be one of His servants in these last days. The Lord flooded me with His loving warmth, and the heat of His presence made the experience seem as if I were resting on a feather bed on a summer day.

[long Bible quote]

Could it be, I wondered, that these prophetic words were being fulfilled here and now? Was I to be one of the Lord’s special maidservants who would see wonders in heaven and earth?

What an honor to be selected as a vessel of the Lord’s love, grace and power in these last days. Certainly this prophetic calling of God was not something I would have chosen for myself, because I am ordinarily a very shy person. I soon learned that all the shyness and bashfulness vanishes when I am experiencing the anointing of the Holy Spirit.

[long Bible quote]

Clearly, God was choosing me to go forth in His name in order to bear lasting fruit--fruit that would remain. He was showing me the power of prayer and the importance of getting close to Him.

[long Bible quote]

The overwhelming excitement and burning anointing of the Holy Spirit continued to intensify as the pastor went on with his prophetic utterance. I literally felt as if I were on fire for God. Pastor Randolph continued:
There’s been a misunderstanding at times in the way you respond to God or the way you connect with God. The Lord says He’s going to remove the misunderstanding...they won’t say, “She’s an enigma.” They’ll say, “She’s just different.”...It’s a godly difference...God has given you a uniqueness. He’s going to minister to you in a unique way. He’s going to speak to you things that only friends would tell friends. He’s going to give you secrets in the night seasons.

To be a close, personal friend of God’s, as Abraham was, has been my heart’s desire since I became a Christian. I treasure moments alone with the Lord. I know His voice, and when my heart is quiet before Him, He is able to speak to me: “My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me” (John 10:27).

Through this compelling message from God, I knew the Father was answering the cry of my heart--to get to know Him better by building an intimate personal relationship with Jesus. My heart was soaring like an eagle while I listened to Him speaking to me through Pastor Randolph:

It’s not showing off what God gives you; it’s keeping secrets. God’s going to tell you things about people that you’ll never tell people. You’ll pray for and intercede [for them], and hold them up in prayer because you’re going to be a friend of God--and that’s a true prophet. It’s just a friend of God. A friend of God.

He’s going to tell you secrets about other people’s lives and about things He’s doing in the earth. So, get ready in 1996 for a fresh anointing of the prophetic to come upon your life. And in the new year, as you wait before the Lord, God’s going to put a fresh Spirit upon you, an anointing of prophecy is going to come upon you.

I knew the words were beautiful and deeply meaningful even though I did not understand all they implied. I felt as if I were clay in the hands of the divine Potter, and He was shaping me, molding me and forming me in preparation for a special ministry that would begin in the very near future. As I spun on the Potter’s wheel, under a mighty anointing of the Spirit of God, I sensed that major changes were already taking place deep in my spirit.

A tinge of fear was soon extinguished by the oil of the Spirit that seemed to drip over every part of my being. My mind tried to find its way into the old channel of questioning, because I felt so unworthy to receive such a wonderful personal message and calling.

How can God use me? I thought. I am a Korean-American, and my use of the English language is not as proficient as it should be. Why would God pick me to be His friend? Why me?

It was all so surprising, but even though I was a young Christian I had already learned the truth of Jesus’ words, “Without Me you can do nothing” (John 15:5). I decided right then and there to accept the Lord’s message by faith, and in my heart I prayed: Father, thank You for giving me this word. I will always say yes to You.
This was my commitment even though I did not fully understand everything the Lord was saying. One thing I did realize, however, was that He would have to prepare me for the ministry He was leading me into.

[long Bible quote]

Little did I realize where those paths would lead me, but I was firm in my resolve to trust the Lord without leaning on my own understanding. After all, isn’t this the essence of the spiritual life? We’re spiritual beings on a human journey. Our true essence is our spirits. Heaven is our true home, and as I’ve discovered, heaven is so real.
Since the moment God called me to a prophetic ministry I have learned that many believers don’t truly believe. Some are not sure that heaven even exists. Others don’t seem to care. Too many go through life as if this world is all there is.

God has shown me an entirely different picture. He has taken me to heaven seventeen different times, and He wants me to let everyone know that heaven is so real! When we truly understand this, it changes everything about us--our motives, attitudes, values, relationships, dreams, plans and perspective. My prayer for you is, you will catch more than a glimpse of heaven as you read and that you will be changed--as I was--and experience the security of knowing Jesus has already prepared a place for you and your loved ones.

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

As I neared the second heaven; I had a sense of foreboding.

Suddenly, in the distance the atmosphere ripped, and a black swarm poured through the opening. From my perspective, the swarm looked like locusts or bees. Whatever it was, it was rapidly heading in my direction.

Demons—black, red-eyed, putrid smelling—surrounded the shield. They looked like winged gargoyles. They began screaming curses at me. I felt trapped, cornered.

These spirits began to vomit a sickly green bile onto the shield. The bile must have had the properties of acid, for it began to burn into the surface, causing it to warp and thin like heated plastic. Then with sharp claws, the demons began to dig through these weakened areas.

“Lord, help me,” I cried.

Angelic Help

Immediately, shrieks came from several of these demons on the outer edge of the pack Quickly they turned their attention from me to two warrior angels clothed in bright armor and to the angel Azar.

I was very glad to see Azar. When I had seen him before, he had told me that he was an angel of “helps” assigned to protect me. Well, I certainly needed help now.

He was dressed in work overalls over which he wore a thin, brown robe. A white tool pouch hung from his belt. Two suction cups that had a handle between them also hung from this belt. (These cups were the kind used to move large sheets of glass.) In addition, he had a tank harnessed to his back. I cheered when I saw him.

The warriors were dressed in armor similar to that worn by centurion guards—except that the armor was shot through with light. Instead of swords, they carried long rods that displayed the Word of God. The demons recoiled at the touch of these rods as if receiving a violent shock. Like wild animals with a fresh kill, however, they fought viciously to retain their prey.

While the warriors were fighting the enemy, Azar pulled out a hose that was attached to the tank harnessed to his back. Quickly he hosed down the bubble to stop the bile from eating through the surface. Just as rapidly, he attached the two suction cups to the bubble. Then he grabbed the handle that was between them. With a great heave, he started to pull the shield upward, away from the battle. The demons began to scream when they realized we were getting away.

The warrior angels held the demons at bay while we made our escape. As we climbed higher, I saw that the warriors were routing the enemy, driving them back toward the rip in the atmosphere. I sighed in relief.

The Corridor

As we arose, the sound of demonic clamor faded. A great sense of peace came over me.

Azar had pulled the shield into an invisible passageway. On either side of the bubble, thousands of angels were flying in a slow, upward spiral. They formed a magnificent, shimmering corridor to Paradise. They smiled at us as we passed.

Laserlike streaks of light flashed by us going up and down. These were angels who were traveling the passageway.

Paradise

Before we entered a greater light at the end of this corridor, Azar veered off to carry me into Paradise a different way. Suddenly, the bubble surfaced through an opening in the turf of God’s perfectly groomed park.

As soon as the shield touched the grass, it went “pink,” bursting as easily as a fragile soap bubble. “Sorry to burst your bubble,” Azar joked.

“Thank you for helping me, Azar,” I said with great relief.

“We aim to please,” he drawled in a cowhand accent. He pulled out a clothes whisk and began dusting me off. I suppose I had bubble flakes on me.

I looked around. How at home I felt here now. Even though I had visited Paradise many times, the beauty and grandeur of God’s park always overwhelmed me.

Azar continued concerning the demons, “‘They’re just a nuisance. Those have no real power. That’s the reason they travel in packs. They’re a bother, though. They can slow you down.”

“And the warriors?” I asked.

“Well,” he smiled, “sometimes I need help myself. Those were Watchers, part of the border patrol. They refuse to take any nonsense from those wishing to interfere.” He stepped back, looking at me, “So, how do you feel?”

“I feel fine,” I said. “Will you thank the Watchers who helped me?”

“I will,” he smiled. He began taking his arms out of the straps that held the tank to his back. “Are you going to see your Daddy?” he asked.

“Yes,” I smiled, handing him the suction cups that had fallen to the ground when the bubble burst.

Angelic Escorts

Two angels who looked like lovely young women came flying by. They wore pale blue robes and had no wings. “Come fly with us, Anna,” they called.

Azar smiled, “They will escort you to the throne room.”

“Will you come with us?” I asked Azar.

“I need to test this equipment before I store it,” he said. “Go on,” he continued. “You’ll enjoy the flight.”

I lifted my arms toward the angels, indicating that I wanted to join them. Laughing, they swooped down and picked me up, one on either side. Immediately they executed two loop-the-loops that took my breath away.

Azar laughed and called after me, “Have a good time with your Daddy.”

Off they flew with me between them. They were like precision stunt flyers executing perilous aerobatics over the terrain of Paradise. They banked, rolled, dove, and looped-the-loop. I knew they were trying to share an experience with me that I could not have on Earth. However I was beginning to be grateful for that fact. They were as exuberant as children.

Anna Rountree #fundie 64.71.77.248

Jesus dismounted from the white horse. Immediately, He turned to help me dismount. Holding me around the waist, He lowered me onto the sea of glass.

As I passed in front of Him, He breathed in the fragrance released from the covenant robe. He said, “You have made My heart beat faster, My sister, My bride.”

For a moment we stood looking at each other. Then both He and the white stallion disappeared.

Angelic Attendants

The twenty-four angelic attendants appeared near me on the sea of glass. They busied themselves preparing me for the ceremony. They smoothed the covenant garment and straightened the veil. As they worked, they smiled up into my face at times to reassure me.

Suddenly I realized that I was facing the entire assembly of heaven. The collective splendor before me was overwhelming.

The Throne Room

The sea of glass was packed with angels and the redeemed. Angels also filled the atmosphere above. Everyone wore white. There were thousands upon thousands gathered. They shone like icicles on a sunny winter’s day. They glistened.

Brighter than them all was the glory of my Father. His piercing white light at the center of the throne radiated out into a rainbow of vibrant colors.

The twenty-four stately elders flanked Him. Angels of His presence stood near the altar of incense before the throne. The four living creatures that are full of eyes were watching. The huge cherubim on either side of the throne peered through the intense light. The seven torches that symbolize the attributes of the Holy Spirit burned even brighter in front of my Father.

Planets and Stars

Amid this breathtaking splendor, images of the planets and stars were passing in review before their Creator. Creation itself was “trooping the colors,” paying homage to its King.

Again, the one lone angel sang:

Blessed is He who comes.
Blessed is He who comes.