Did We Come From Unicellular Organisms?

The first time I heard this absurd statement was during the first day of my 9th grade biology class, and I laughed out loud, thinking it was a joke. Sadly, it turns out that many people do believe such a ridiculous notion. They also tend to be the people who think that the universe magically came about from nothing, and life came about from a chemical reaction. How many people on these forums believe that we came from organisms as simple as common bacteria?

["At one point, unicellular organisms were the only form of life in the universe, scientific fact."]

No, it's not a scientific fact any more than the "fact" that the Earth is over a billion years old or that dinosaurs existed.

There were primordial creatures which existed, whose skeletons were found by archaeologists, that we typically consider "dinosaurs." However, they could have lived no more than 6,000 years ago, as that was when the Earth was created by God. They certainly did not inhabit the Earth millions of years ago.

[....]

There are various forms of science which we can safely put our faith in -- these have to do with readily observable phenomena. However, once you claim we randomly evolved from an organism which first existed over a billion years ago, you've got to be pulling all these "facts" out of your ass. No one was alive billions of years ago to know this.

[He goes on like this for a while]