Rubyfruit my dear, he is entirely serious. Don't try to understand him, it will make you feel ill. Phelps is just a nasty, twisted old coot. The saddest thing is how he has screwed up his family's lives so badly. There's nothing we can do except point and laugh.
Moving on, if you want a really good spoof Christmas carol, you can't really do better then this little beauty, by the HP Lovecraft Historical Society;
The Carol of the Old Ones
Look to the sky, way up on high
There in the night stars are now right.
Eons have passed: now then at last
Prison walls break, Old Ones awake!
They will return: mankind will learn
New kinds of fear when they are here.
They will reclaim all in their name;
Hopes turn to black when they come back.
Ignorant fools, mankind now rules
Where they ruled then: it's theirs again
Stars brightly burning, boiling and churning
Bode a returning season of doom
Scary scary scary scary solstice
Very very very scary solstice
Up from the sea, from underground
Down from the sky, they're all around
They will return: mankind will learn
New kinds of fear when they are here
Look to the sky, way up on high
There in the night stars are now right.
Eons have passed: now then at last
Prison walls break, Old Ones awake!
Madness will reign, terror and pain
Woes without end where they extend.
Ignorant fools, mankind now rules
Where they ruled then: it's theirs again
Stars brightly burning, boiling and churning
Bode a returning season of doom
Scary scary scary scary solstice
Very very very scary solstice
Up from the sea, from underground
Down from the sky, they're all around.
Fear
(Look to the sky, way up on high
There in the night stars now are right)
They will return.
You can hear it being beautifully performed by the Dagon Tabernacle Choir at the following link.
http://www.cthulhulives.org/solsticecarol.html
"It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Fish-Men" is fun too. Search Youtube, there are quite a few.
Have a Scary Solstice! (especially if you are Fred Phelps)