I just had spiritual fight against Satan. I just got out of bed and my thinking is not straight yet. He sent many fallen angels at me. I asked for help and there was nobody to help. No, there was one. I don't know who it was. There was one person who helped me. I was too busy fighting to see who it was. I don't mean jesus because he always helps, but there was another person fighting them, too.
A dark angel was killing my son's dog, too, while I was fighting the others. He had his hand around his neck chocking him. When I woke up the dog was at the foot of my bed chocking. I picked him up and took him outside for some air. He is okay now...
There were so many of them this time. I feel like it was somebody from this site who was helping me, but I was too busy to see. They were in another room fighting.
The angels came from everywhere, even from the toilet, and the closets. The walls. I was raising my arms and fighting. Some imploded and were cast away inside the firey sphere. Others then left. It was a lot of fighting. When it was quite I went to pick up some clothes off the floor and something from inside the closet was pulling on my clothes and trying to drag me into the closet with them.
I said By the Power of His Blood and the pulling stopped.
74 comments
"The angels came from everywhere, even from the toilet, and the closets."
Ladies and gentlemen, we have discoverd the source of child preditors and childrens fear of toilets and dark closets. After much debate and several peer reviews with my multible personalities, it's nonother than angels. Yes, you heard me right, angles. These mythical creatures not only exist in fairly tails and other works of fiction like the Bible, but are figments of people's imagnation used to scare little children and latter adults into submission. This imaginary friend, or enimy, pretends to help or hinder people acourding to the viewer's needs. They can easily command people to kill, and even imbet thoughts into other people's mind.
The only known cure is lack of religion, over 1 Billion atheists dont see these creatures and are unafected by their mind control. Religious bewere, your sky daddy is watching you right now and by reading this you will go to HELL!!!
I feel bad for his son. With a nut like him for a father there is little hope for him growing up to be mentally stable. I mean seriously, I wake up to my dog choking from time to time as well (she stops within 10-20 seconds as it seems to be that she woke up because she wasn't getting enough air while snoring) and I don't go around saying a dark angel is the cause. However, like everyone else my dreams have been effected by outside influences. One time I was dreaming of some sort of courtroom argument that I was involved in and woke up to find that I left my tv on and Matlock had come on. However, the last time I checked it wasn't real...Or was it. Dun, dun, dun.
If this idiot really believes this shit, and actually does have delusional bouts like he's described above, he's highly unlikely to seek the kind of professional help he obviously, desperately, needs.
It's intervention time.
I'm not sure I want to make fun of this guy. He has delusions of persecution and paranoia. He has audio and visual hallucinations. He is unable to differentiate between reality and fantasy.
He isn't a fundie. He's an undiagnosed schizophrenic.
The fact that a lot of idiots are going to encourage him in his illness out of fundie fanaticism is tragic. In a just world, this guy would be getting medical help before it's too late.
I'm actually gonna pray for this guy myself. Not to aid him in his struggle with satan, but that he gets the help he needs.
You poor thing. Angels coming out of the closet is bad enough, but those friggin toilet angels are the WORST!! I mean, how are you supposed to fight a big, flying turd?
If this is story isn't a fabrication, you were either having a really weird dream, were tripping on something, or are having a mental break down.
Huffers, no, he really can't be both at once. Being a fundie is the result of seriously misguided personal choices and/or foolish indoctrination. It's not the result of actual physiological disturbance. This guy is a victim of the fundie culture. His mental disorder is being manipulated and exploited by the fundies, and he is no more to blame for his lunacy than any misguided innocent. He should be pitied, not mocked.
Unless, of course, he isn't schizophrenic. Then he is a nut job and fair game.
Mary Sunshine:
You poor thing. Angels coming out of the closet is bad enough, but those friggin toilet angels are the WORST!! I mean, how are you supposed to fight a big, flying turd?
You name him Michael and post his quotes on FSTDT.
"When I woke up the dog was at the foot of my bed chocking. I picked him up and took him outside for some air. He is okay now..."
Listen to your mother, clean your damn room![
And if by 'dark angel' you're talking Jessica Alba, well she can emerge from by bathroom, choke my dog, my chicken, whatever!
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"I asked for help and there was nobody to help. No, there was one. I don't know who it was. There was one person who helped me. I was too busy fighting to see who it was. I don't mean jesus because he always helps, but there was another person fighting them, too."
Who else could it have been but Chuck Norris?
Also, I just have to nominate this for a "'Chock' full o'Nuts" award.
You know, there are times when I'm having a bad dream, and then I think I've woken up, but it turns out I'm still dreaming and bad-dream things continue to happen to me.
It's like that episode of Star Trek: Voyager , where Chakotay sees Earth's moon outside the window, and then thinks he's woken up, but then he looks outside and still sees Earth's moon.
Maybe this explains why Michael Mullen thinks he's engaged in a real spiritual war and not merely having a nightmare.
"I just had spiritual fight against Satan. I just got out of bed and my thinking is not straight yet. He sent many fallen angels at me. I asked for help and there was nobody to help. No, there was one. I don't know who it was. There was one person who helped me. I was too busy fighting to see who it was. I don't mean jesus because he always helps, but there was another person fighting them, too."
Next time you get colossal morning wood, just have a wank or take a cold shower. Or roll over and see if your girlfriend's up for another one, if you're lucky enough to have one.
Oh, and tracer, I've had a dream one worse than that - when you hit the alarm clock, fall back asleep and DREAM THAT YOU'VE GOT UP AND GONE TO WORK!!
"Unless, of course, he isn't schizophrenic. Then he is a nut job and fair game."
Sandman, can I have that for my sig file?
*Blink, blink*
The brown acid is bad.
Any chance this is a book? The host site is 404.
This is either the work of a good author or a total nutjob.
EDIT: Nevermind. Must be a nutjob. A good author wouldn't misspell "quiet" and then fail to proofread it.
Look, just because the gas station gives you a free egg salad sandwich from their deli with a fill-up doesn't mean you should eat it. If you are gonna eat it, at least try not to do it right before you go to sleep.
A dark angel was killing my son's dog, too, while I was fighting the others. He had his hand around his neck chocking him. When I woke up the dog was at the foot of my bed chocking. I picked him up and took him outside for some air. He is okay now...
Dreams can be altered by hearing noises; in this case, you had a dream about demons choking your dog, because you heard your dog choking. It's not the other way around.
be advised, you may be schizophrenic
although I know this illness is just interpreted as demonic possession by a number of fundies
Going off that story, taking it at face value, I'm counting depersonalization, hallucination, failing grasp of reality... Oi. Please get professional help AND MEDICATION. Not even going to try and make fun of it, if this is no Poe then some serious schizofrenia or personality disorder is happening.
People that have not seen do not believe ,
But Satan and his demons are real and if you
Don't believe in Jesus and his army of angels
And you weren't there,you have no right to judge
Everyone will soon see that Satan is real
And he is hear to destroy,kill,take anyone he
Can time is running out,JESUS is coming soon
JenniferTarasmomOklahoma!!!!!!!!.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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