Obama Speech today - If Rapture happens while he is speaking....Hmmmmm
I wonder what he would say...
He is making his speech... blah, blah, blah and all of sudden right before his eyes, the Rapture happens!! I am sure he at first will be speechless and then probably blame it on Bush!!
But really, I was driving to pick up my girls from school today and this came to mind!! What a scenario!! Yikes!
68 comments
Tell me about it. Sometimes I'm watching the early rounds of American Idol, and I think, "Hang on, Simon Cowell, what would you do if the Rapture happened right before your eyes? Ha. I bet you've never even thought about it." Or I'll be waiting in line at the supermarket, bubbling with irrational hatred for the high-school student who has to scan my Sobe Life Water three times to make it go through, and I think, "Well, missy, I just hope you're keeping in mind what Jesus will say if when the Rapture happens he finds you standing there in your smock, not being prompt and cheerful about my Sobe Life Water. You little hooligan." Then I remember I forgot to pick the girls up from school. What a scenario. Yikes.
You might as well wear a sign announcing to the rest of the world what an ignorant fuck you are, making a stupid comment like that.
I am sure he at first will be speechless and then probably blame it on Bush!!
Why would you assume Obama wouldn't be raptured, too? He's a baptized, believing Christian.
Part of me almost wishes the Rapture were real, just so I could see the looks on the faces of the RR crowd when Obama is Raptured (along with those Christians who actually follow the teachings of their Christ ) and they're all left behind.
As an ex-Christian, I'm not being "Raptured" whether it happens or not. So really, schadenfreude is the only reason I would have to care about it one way or the other.
If by some chance this scenario WERE to happen the way this idiot envisions, Obama would probably not notice until well after his speech - there being no-one in Congress who would disappear. In this case, Obama would probably drop to his knees and say "Thank you God, for getting rid of all those idiots - now, with Your help, we can get some real work done"
(Rat leans in close to CakeDecorator and whispers into his/her ear.)
Pssst...I didn't want to be the one to tell you this, but...
...your Rapture scenario is just like your cake: one huge lie.
Yes, yes. The Rapture happens and 144,000 Hasidim disappear and no one notices. When someone finally does notice, the Raptards proclaim that the Rapture didn't really happen yet. Then Superman shows up and juggles Kryptonite and the crowd goes wild. After that, gravity stops working and we all fly off into space. What a scenario!! Yike! (More than one Yike seemed exaggerated.)
John_in_Oz The Rapture happened before the first generation of apostles died. Don't you believe Jesus's promises?
Rebellion Dog Actually the Rapture happened at the instant of Jesus' death. See Matthew 27:50-53
You know the answer to that already: they are only physically dead. Spiritually, they are still alive.
Don't ask how that works though, because I'v never seen any christian tackling that question without stumbling and falling with his face up his ass.
But really, I was driving to pick up my girls from school today and this came to mind!! What a scenario!! Yikes!
Yikes is right, I'm tired of playing tag on the road with idiots like you. KEEP YOUR MIND ON THE GOD DAMN ROAD OR GET OFF OF IT!
Wait, if Obama's talking to the white house press corp how would he notice the rapture? They all work for the evil, jew run, liberal media!
Why can't these people fantasize about sex like normal people.
"But really, I was driving to pick up my girls from school today and this came to mind!!"
And it's the only way it'll happen: in your mind. Remember, CakeDecorator (& everyone else on Ruptured Retards):
One more day the (C)Rapture hasn't happened, is another day we Atheists are proved right.
I remember the "Blah, blah, blah" speech. It was riviting and inspiring, much better than W ever did
If the Rapture was real and it happened I'd most likely will myself to stay behind, after all unlike Raptards I care about people.
Then I'd cap the Anti-Christ, IED the four Horsemen when they go by, open up a business with the "Second coming of Christ" and we can let the Fundis stew in the back closet of Heaven.
Because that makes about as much sense.
As much as I want it to happen, that's still a pretty damn huge if.
Still with us? Yeah, that's because Jesus hates you.
If the rapture did happen, only flat earth atheists would try to deny it. That is, of course, assuming that a significant number of people are raptured. I don't know why these Rapture Retards think it'd be different, other than the possibility that they just think we're morons.
So just fantasizing about The Rapture isn't enough anymore. Now your vapid fantasies have to include the president, staring in awe as you ascend into heaven, snickering all the way that you have been proven right. And I thought you Rapture cultists couldn't possibly get any more narcissistic: how wrong I was.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
