"WTF?!" Award

Moses David / The Family International #fundie xfamily.org

Hong Kong Goolagong is believed by The Family to be a sexually ambiguous Australian Aboriginal hitchhiking demon who attacks Christian missionaries who bring the advances of Western civilization to dark-skinned people and Aborigines in particular.
The name “Goolagong” was revealed by David Berg in a coughing fit where “every cough was a word and — every word was shaped like a nipple with all the nerves running up to the nipple.” Berg described the 1981 “demonic attack” as similar to being overwhelmed by smothering female breasts.

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Selected excerpts from The Battle Of The Bosoms follow

29. WE WERE LIKE A WHITE SAFARI GOING THROUGH THIS JUNGLE, & this thing attacked me with these words shaped like nipples. Isn't that peculiar? It was like I had to grab every one of them & conquer them, just like a woman. You know, there are female spirits, female devils, did you know that? (Maria: Yes!)

40. IT'S FUNNY, WE WERE LIKE A WHITE SAFARI GOING THROUGH THIS DARK JUNGLE & we kept being attacked by these bosoms, & I kept having to grab each one & squeeze it like I was conquering it. And they were like words.--And this big one I had the biggest trouble with until I learned its name. Each one was a word & it came up in the nipple, & you had to squeeze it to conquer it. See, we have to reach out by the hand of faith & really attack, you see? We can't just laugh it off or brush it aside & act like it's not important.

49. I TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT HORRIBLE HINDU TEMPLE IN CALIFORNIA that stood over the cliff where they had these evil spirit rites, but a girl out of that temple got saved in our church. So we went out & walked around it, & Grandmother just felt a terrible spirit off of that place, so she just rebuked it in Jesus' name! She quoted that verse, "You said, Lord, that if we have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say to this mountain be cast into the sea & it shall be done!" (Mt.17:20.) She said, "Lord, I've got faith that I should cast this mountain into the sea, in Jesus' name!"

50.--AND ABOUT TWO OR THREE DAYS LATER WE PICKED UP A NEWSPAPER & HERE WAS A PICTURE OF THIS HINDU TEMPLE SLIDING INTO THE PACIFIC! The whole cliff had collapsed & the temple was half-buried in the ocean! And my mother just jumped up & down with joy! It nearly scared me silly! My God! Whew! It made me realise those things are very real! I mean, you don't just play around with them or laugh at them or think it's some kind of a joke or foolish superstition!

53. WE WERE WALKING THROUGH THIS JUNGLE & THESE THINGS WERE ATTACKING US, these demonic nipples, words, till finally that one got in my throat, isn't that funny? I mean, it's not funny! (Maria: Oh yeah!--The words got in your throat!)--Till finally you prayed with me & I got that name. I guess in my sleep I must have rebuked it in Jesus' name, because that came back to me, you know? I told you after I woke up.

70. THANK YOU FOR FIGHTING THE BATTLE WITH ME, HONEY! I was really really having a battle! The Battle of the Bosoms! Isn't that funny? I wonder why that symbolism? The bosoms are what nurse the child & carry the milk, like the sincere milk of the Word. But these are all like lies, see? Like they were bosoms that were pretending to nourish but instead they were liars that damn, even the names of evil devils & evil spirits! I love you, Honey, TYJ!

110. "THE BATTLE OF THE BOSOMS"! I wonder if that's got anything to do with denipplisation? They were all cut-off bosoms! I remember one of them was trying to choke me! Come to think of it, I think they do have some jungles in Australia! There was jungle in that film we saw about the alligator hunting around Darwin, & up around the Darwin area are where most of the Aborigines live. The more I think about it, Goolagong was a female demon! We couldn't even dream up a thing like that, it's so far out!

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Confused?

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