[next to a picture of a little girl trick-or-treating]
What would Jesus drop into her pumpkin?
Would Jesus run off to church or hide back in the TV room with the front lights off?...
Or would He use this golden opportunity to share His love with her?
52 comments
What would Jesus drop into her pumpkin?
Eeeew!
Or would He use this golden opportunity to share His love with her?
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!
the pix was kind of, well, I thought of pedophiles. I also read the comic First Bite where a woman converts a vampire. Right. The Chosen One is called 'Igor.' What's disturbing is that people truly believe his garbage. Igor. LMAO!
@ myheadhurts:
Actually, it's a Christian tradition (!!!). Halloween was originally called All Hallow's Eve; just before the Feast of All Saints is the last time evil spirits can freely roam the Earth before being pushed back to Hell by the combined power of all saints.
Watch Disney's Fantasia again: right after Mussorgsky's Night on Bald Mountain , where the Devil minion's revelry is cut short at the first stroke of midnight by a church bell, comes Schubert's Ave Maria ...
No, I don't expect Fundies to understand this.
Besides, horrible monsters from the pits of Hell have also benefited from our civilizing influence: at first, they forcefully snatched our souls, but now, they kindly ask for candy.
Puh-lease ya loser, Jesus would come to the door dressed as Merlin from "The Sword and the Stone," drop some candy into her pumpkin, and tell her to have fun the rest of the night and be careful.
This is quite as bad as it seems...but damn is that a poor choice of words.
@Alethe: All Hallow's eve, heh. That reminds me of all hallows Steve (best legomation eva)
I know it's Jack Chick the one who is talking here, so expecting high literature is out of the question...
But please, do not write something that can be interpreted as a pedophile Jesus, ok, Jack?
"Or would He use this golden opportunity to share His love with her?"
What - like Joe Barron and Tony Alamo?
So you're admitting that Jesus is a paedo nonce, Jack? Speaks volumes about your mindset & beliefs too. And even more reason for we Atheists to never trust a fundie like you.
Some of the tradition of todays Halloween have Pagan roots, a night to revere the dead and otherworldy forces. Like Yule and Ester the Catholics put their stank on Pagan holidays to own them.
Easters coming,,,watch for the Fundies going nuts over chocolate bunnies and eggs with " what's that got to do with Jesus?" comments
"Happy Halloween! Here, have full-sized chocolate bars."
(I dunno, I can see that happening...)
How the hell would you know what Jesus would do Jack?
And having read your "work," your conception of god is far more scary than anything associated with Halloween.
"Jesus took some bread and when He had said the blessing He broke it and gave it to the disciples. 'Take it and eat,' He said, 'this is my body.' Then He took a cup and when He had returned thanks He gave it to them. 'Drink all of you from this,' He said, 'for this is my blood'" (Matthew 26:26-28). Then he took some candy and gave it to the girl. 'Take it and eat,' He said 'not because it's blood or flesh or something, but because candy is awesome in the eyes of my Father. And trust not Jack Chick,' He continued, 'for that man is a colossal douche and an embarrassment to all My followers, except the ones that are douchebags like him, I guess.' He frowned. 'I mean, this guy makes his own Messiah sound like a pedo. But fuck him. My point is, candy is awesome. Here, have some.' Having shared His divine wisdom with the girl, Jesus withdrew, leaving her much enlightened on matters of religion and the nature of douchebags, as well as a few new words in her vocabulary.
[next to a picture of a little girl trick-or-treating ]
"What would Jesus drop into her pumpkin?"
"would He use this golden opportunity to share His love with her?"
Jack Prick = Tony Alamo/David J. Stewart.
We don't need to be Freud to figure you lot out.
For a brief moment, I thought that this was just a poorly phrased way of saying that it was silly for some Christians to see Halloween as evil.
Then, I realized that this was from Jack Chick.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
