(Part 2/5 of "How Women Manipulate Men and the Female Ego". Emphasis original)
Women are aloof
What a woman says and does are two different things
When a woman is attracted to a man, this usually does not necessarily mean she will sleep and be in a relationship with him. She will need comfort and when she also has this, she still will usually want one more thing: a man’s attachment to her.
To ensure this attachment the following mechanism takes place :
At the beginning of a get-together things might seem smooth and you get to know each other and might enjoy yourself. However at a certain point, which might also happen very fast, she either completely looses interest in you or pushes you away emotionally. In case she looses interest though she is attracted, she already recognized that you did not escalate fast enough, which shows her your attachment is not strong enough for her to be interested anymore. In the other case pushing you away serves her to hold you in an emotional limbo, at a certain distance. If you, as a man feel confused, uncomfortable or victimized (even to the point of psychic terror), though having good intentions, this process might be just unfolding. Also as a form of one of the multitudinous manipulation techniques. This is called aloofness.
Figure 1 and 2 illustrate this process.
Figure 1 Push
When the man comes too close emotionally a pushing away will happen. This is indicated by a shield from Captain America :). As soon as it might feel like you are becoming a friend she has to create a distance. A few practical examples on how this happens are:
You might be enjoying a good and friendly conversation and she stops responding (showing disinterest or becoming quiet) She puts you down in various ways. E.g. (in)directly stating that she has no affiliation with you. Disqualifying, arbitrary criticism and manipulation. She will say something like “You are not giving me enough space”, “I need space”, “I am afraid of getting hurt.”
Figure 2 Pull
When you are about to loose interest yourself, usually because you do not want to put up with the BS and games anymore, the opposite will happen and she will try to reel you in again, often for fear of loosing you. However this will happen only to the degree that you can still be manipulated. In a sense she is like a puppeteer and gains control and power through that process.
Hiding the intention and recontextualizing play a huge role here. The man is supposed to think that something was his fault. To bring him back she might also offer sex or pretends to be friendly and courteous for a while.
“You have to fight for me”. By saying this she puts the weight on the man’s shoulder, so that he now keeps leaning in by himself again and catches the carrot.