Barack Obama seems to be obsessed with the number thirteen. He recently commissioned thirteen teams of census workers to travel across our country in thirteen vehicles with banners promoting the 2010 census. Thousands of census workers are being hired temporarily with their average pay being around thirteen dollars per hour. In Obama's recent State of the Union Address, the President announced that money was being allocated to build thirteen new light rail systems that will create thirteen thousand new jobs. (1) There are so many more examples of Obama's obsession with the number thirteen that I could not mention them all in this newsletter. I must mention, however, that Barack Obama broke national tradition by refusing to give his State of the Union Address on January 20th. Instead, he chose the date 1-27-2010. In occult numerology everything is broken down to single digits, and zeros mean nothing. Thus, the date 1-27-2010 totals thirteen! This is all beyond the realm of coincidence!
55 comments
@jsonitsac - I second that.
"This is all beyond the realm of coincidence!"
I say it's your confirmaion bias if you ask me.
You know... I was going to make a parody post about Bush and 13, so I googled, and it turns out there's already a crank website dedicated to that :p
so, I went for 666 instead. that probably exists, but mine is more....creative.
George W. bush left office in January 20, 2009. now, In occult numerology everything is broken down to single digits, and zeros mean nothing. Thus, the date 1-20-2010 totals 6.
He started his service with the national guard in 1968, which adds up to 24, which is 6!
He started his career as a governor on January 17, 1995, which also adds up to 33, which adds up to 6.
666!
Also, He was born on July 6, 1946, or 1946-6-6 !!!
Bush is the devil!
Well David, it'll be fine! Because both me and you know that 13 is an unlucky number! All his plans will come to ruins!
And I applaud the melodrama in the last two sentences. You definitely showed conspiracy theorists how to really throw down a conspiracy!
Better send me all your money, becase it is cursed. Just look at a dollar: 13 stars, 13 arrows, 13 olive branches, 13 feathers in the eagle's tail, 13 stones in the pyramid, etc.
Send me all your currency and I will remove the curses from it.
The seal of the United States is obsessed with the number 13 to:
Thirteen stripes on the flag, thirteen arrows in the eagles right claw, thirteen leaves on the olive branch in the eagles left claw, thirteen stars, thirteen levels on the unfinished pyramid, thirteen letters in Annuit cptis (if you count as one letter) and e pluribus unum . There where thirteen colonies!
The founders planted Obama! They knew that a Kenyan (even though Kenya wouldn't exist for almost two hundred years) would be born and they would fake that he was born in Hawaii (even though it didn't become a state till 1959.) They knew, they planned everything!
Pull the wool off your eyes and wake up America!
*gunshot*
Sorry about that folks, somehow Glenn Beck got hold of my computer. Seriously though, I doubt that Obama is obsessing with the number 13.
@#1130101 - "I'm 13 and what is this?"
You're a lucky 13, that's the retirement age at the Neverland Ranch.
OMG OMG OMG!!!
The Alabama Crimson Tide just gave Obama an Alabama helmet...
It was the number 13!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
They also gave him a number 1 jersey in the THIRD month of the year 1 3...13!
He's used his Satanic powers to gain control of Alabama, soon they will all be secret Muslims too....
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh yeah? Well, "David J. Meyer" requires lifting the pen off the paper twelve times, making for a total of THIRTEEN strokes! You're in on this, too!
In occult numerology everything is broken down to single digits, and zeros mean nothing.
Then wouldn't the number that Obama is obsessed with be 4?
Fundie Index: 13
Its a conspiracy! :DERP:
Nope it's firmly in the realm of coincidence. You can take any number (under about 50 or so) and find it reapeated enough in any situation or in regards to any person. The larger the situation, the more examples you will find, so for say the president, that can cover almost anything that the government does, allowing you to find many examples of any number.
I have a feeling that the total of Mr. Meyer's fingers, toes, teeth,, and IQ is around thirteen. He must be Satan.
That reminds me of that night I had sex with Mrs. Meyer 13 times, in 3 different orifices. However, 2 of those times it was oral, which may not count, so 13-2=11. 3x11=33, and Jesus died AD 33. Could it be that my dick is the second coming of Christ?
You know who else was obsessed with the number 13? Whoever designed the dollar bill! It's over all that shit! 13 stars, 13 arrows, 13 steps on the pyramid. It's crazy. Almost like the number 13 was important somehow. Like, I don't know, the number of original colonies.
Also, Obama personally sets the number of census workers and how much they are paid.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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