In the UK, we do not have anywhere near the same freedom of speech as you guys in the US (and elsewhere) have. Over here, if we call a nigger a nigger, we risk susbtsantial fines, compensation orders to the nigger and even imprisonment. Seriously.

As such, we have to be VERY careful and creative when it comes to effectively banning niggers from premises and facilities as if it can result in bankruptcy and imprisonment. At the same time of course, letting a nigger move in can rapidly destroy a thriving business.

Among a couple of other little ventures, I have a 50% share in a small guest house in England - and to keep things nigger free and hassle free, we tend to focus only on contractors working away from home.

Today we had our last vacancy taken and although the persons's name was very English sounding, in the past we have had people "make bookings" for their friends / relatives etc - so you cannot always go by name or accent.

Anyway, I had taken a booking (and advance payment) and this person was due to arrive.

You can imagine how I started to die inside when this nigger walks up with a case in tow asking if he had found us. (No point lying as even a nigger would work out the address in a few seconds if it looked at the numbering on the street).

"Yes" I said, choking on the words and wishing I had just missed the enquiry from it altogether.

"Ah Goods", it ooks and then to my confusion, hollers out the name of my guest who then came around the corner with another case. The nigger was just the taxi driver and its passenger was an extremely civilised human.

What I dreaded suddenly turned into profound relief, I had to resist the temptation not to punch the air and go "Result!!".

I am still on a natural high.