SPEEDING AND TRAFFIC VIOLATION DEMONS
Additional spirits that are active in this category of daily living are: blocked concentration (of driver), roving mind, heavy foot, fear of making mistakes in driving, fear of getting caught by police, and others.
57 comments
The next time I have to take a Driver Safety course, I'll just tell the instructor to find a True Christian® minister and have that minister cast the traffic demon out of me.HATE being called True Christians® just thought I'd pass that along to everyone... image )
Now I'm guessing these demonbusters are Pentecostals -- they're the ones most inclined to rant and rave like this, at least in my limited knowledge. Now as I understand it, a good number of Pentecostals are small-u unitarians. I wonder if these demon-haunted folk would appreciate knowing that their world view is essentially grossly polytheistic-tending-towards-pantheist. (Not to mention how most fundies of any stripe will swear up and down that dualism is a heresy and then turn right around and say something that would seem to imply that God's victory over Satan is not a foregone conclusion. Oh ye of little faith...)
I'm often plagued by demons of jay walking. I tend to cross a certain street every day so I know the order in which the traffic lights operate, which allows me to cross when my light is still red but traffic won't bother me or just seconds before the light turns green and all other traffic is already standing still. Could I please have this demon rewarded with some gift voucher? (S)He often helped me get to my train in time.
Welcome to the 21st century, where people think demons make them bad drivers!
Oh man, we should make up a whole bunch of demons. Like:
<< Welcome to the 21st century, where people think demons make them bad drivers!Jonathan: Yes, I did, and to say that the one we've got is a disappointment would be the granddaddy of all understatements.
~David D.G.
Suddenly my life makes sense! I'm plagued by triple-fat-cheese-eating demons, coffee-ice-cream demons, and -- yes -- there's an FSTDT demon that makes me read this instead of working. I feel so much better now!
I can see it now:
So...at long last...the true meaning of "Speed Demon".
@ Old Viking
Haha, yeah, I'm pretty sure he rides shotgun with
> Additional spirits that are active in this category of daily living are...fear of getting caught by police
I would suggest that bad drivers aren't being visited by enough of these particular demons.
On a personal note, I particularly dislike the demons which make drivers think they should drive with their headlights on full beam all the time. Out, out!
When you are engrossed in sin, just blame it on the demons. That way, you look good to god. You look like an idiot to everyone else, of course. But since when do fundies care about anyone other than themselves?
Ok, I'm curious and have to ask; if I take a dump and miss the toilet and instead get it on the floor, is that caused by a demon? Or if I take a piss, and get it all over the seat, is my wife justified in damning me to hell?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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