You are a fool living in LA-LA land and you are talking about things you know nothing about.
...
You are 15. Double it to 30. that is how long I have given my life to the Scriptures, night and day, neverending, everyday, sacrificing all. Experiencing the spirit world. Traveling to the Dark World. The cloud World. The Bottomless Pit. Hell. The High Throne of God. Visiting with Jesus in person. Being in the grasps of Satan. Fighting his angels and demons.
58 comments
You can read scripture till you're 90, you still ain't gonna learn anything new.
Well, five points for making more sense than the "JESUS CHRIST REINCARNATED" guy, but minus ten for wasting your life. Sorry, but having a negative score disqualifies you from Final Jeopardy. Try again next time.
Double it to 30. that is how long I have given my life to the Scriptures, night and day, neverending, everyday, sacrificing all
PROPHET MICHAEL MULLEN: But it's not all "slaving away for god", I've got a superb health package, free dental and vision, and a company car. Check it out, '92 Ford Probe, not too shabby. I also get four weeks a year off, but I have to take them off between november and april. And then of course, the kilo a week of booger sugar. So stop in and fill out a job application, you never know, this Probe could be yours one day, think about it.
Well, that's your trouble right there: You've wasted your entire life, so far, obsessing over fairy tales to the exclusion of rational thought and all else, and it's left you totally bat-shit insane.
I admit, I'm curious about the Dark World, the Cloud World, and being in the "grasps" of Satan. Does Satan have several arms like Hindu divinities?
You are 15. Double it to 30. that is how long I have given my life to the Scriptures, night and day, neverending, everyday, sacrificing all.
*laughs*
"You are a fool living in LA-LA land and you are talking about things you know nothing about. "
What is 'things cyborgtroy would say about fundies'?
"You are 15."
... This is true.
"Double it to 30."
...
"that is how long I have given my life to the Scriptures, night and day, neverending, everyday, sacrificing all. Experiencing the spirit world. Traveling to the Dark World. The cloud World. The Bottomless Pit. Hell. The High Throne of God. Visiting with Jesus in person. Being in the grasps of Satan. Fighting his angels and demons."
I did the same thing, but I was awake and playing a video game, thus it was much more real than any of your experiences.
Dang, Prophet Mike has ben everywhere. I've been to Kalamazoo...does that count?
Sounds like an awesome D&D campaign.
Seriusly, this guy must be on some heavy stuff. And why is he fighting God's angels, anyway?
Yes, and I'm sure that you saved the Empire from Mehrunes Dagon and went down to Elseweyr to do some skooma with Rastajiiht philosophers.
Now, put the 'shrooms down, and go detox.
What is this, a fundie version of the 4 yorkshiremen sketch?
"Thirty years? That's nothing! Last night God had his angels whisk me away from my bed to a timeless place where I spent 1000 years studying the true word of god, the third gospel. Then he bound me over to not breathe one word of it to a living soul before it was time and sent me back to Earth not one second after I had left!"
Hey, you're right, this is fun!
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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