Wyatt Junker #fundie

Wyatt Junker #fundie libertydwells.com

Listen. If I came from an ape, then I will eat like an ape and F like an ape and pick up a rock and kill like an ape. Its that simple. Why is evolution hard to understand? King of the Fking Mountain, yo. IF, I really believed it. I mean really really really believed it, tomorrow I'd be robbing banks after raping the tellers. Lucky for you and everyone else here, I don't believe I came from apes buttsexing each other, or retards screwing into newer, better mutants with extra cool super powers.

47 comments

old comment by Shax

You do eat like an ape. You eat a variety of plant foods, combined with meat and grain.

You fuck like an ape, just like everyone else on this mudball.

If you wanted to, you could kill like an ape, using a tool such as a rock. We have better tools now, though. If you hunt your own meat, you use them.

You are an ape of a species that has evolved to live in a civilization alongside other members of your own species. You are free to try to rob a bank and rape the tellers if you want. Since this sort of behavior is harmful to the civilization that our species has constructed, you will be found and dealt with, most likely in the harshest manner possible.

old comment by Kuno

I mean really really really believed it, tomorrow I'd be robbing banks after raping the tellers.

And society would notice your behavior as harmful to it and would either put you in prison or down. Either way you could not procreate and whether your sociopathy was hereditary or learned, you couldn’t pass it on to your hypothetical children. Your DNA line would die out.

At the same time people that behave in a way that is good for society prosper and have real children, to whom they either pass on or teach this good behavior and most probably these children and their children and so forth will do the same.

On a higher level, any society which does not behave like that would soon self-destruct and would be out-competed by other societies that do.

Do you see how that evolution thing is working?

old comment by Swede

Evolution isn't hard to understand if you really try, stupid, it's only hard to understand if you refuse to understand. Children in Sweden are taught the basics of the ToE when they're about 10 years old, sometimes even earlier.

Btw, you ARE a Great Ape, silly. We share a common ancestor with all the other Great Apes (chimpanzees, gorillas and orangutans), and humans and chimpanzees are closer related to each other, than either is to the other Great Apes.

As humans are social animals, we have evolved empathy for each other and compliance with rules. Ancestors lacking in these respects weren't allowed to stay in the community. That's why very few of us rob banks or rape tellers. Only people with faulty empathy manage to do things like that.

old comment by SpukiKitty

Listen. If I came from an ape, then I will eat like an ape and F like an ape and pick up a rock and kill like an ape.

We do, you dink!

I don't believe I came from apes buttsexing each other....

Uh, other apes reproduce like any other mammal (humans included), with reproductive systems.

...or retards screwing into newer, better mutants with extra cool super powers.

Now, you're being a weirdo.

Look, Mr. Junkheap; Evolution NEVER declared that humans came from non-human ape bowel movements or the sex lives IQ-impaired X-Men rejects. Where you got those ideas are beyond me but said comment scream "TROLL"!

Also, we're not made of Mid-Eastern dirt & rib bones! The ghost of Joseph Campbell needs to visit you, personally!

@Mister Spak

Nah, an ape would make better arguments.

old comment by Pule Thamex

Amazing! Thrilling heroes develop super powers!

Latest findings show an increase in incredible superpowers for atheists. Largely self-developed, these fantastic powers include, antigullibility, the ability to deflect delusion bolts, resistance to superstition, super-anti-bigotry-vision, the awesome ability to be moderate and the super-senses of tolerance and kindness.

Thanks to these ever vigilant atheist super-heroes, rampaging apes have ceased their teller-raping ways and have resorted to shit flinging. Villainous trolls have been reduced to toothless herp-a-derping from their secret hideaways in Mommy's basement and under bridges.

Super-hero Captain Asserto told us, "Wherever there is spittle-flecking villainy, there shall you find the fantastic Atheist LOL Patrol and The Mighty Mockery Brigade to combat these heinous villains, thus I, Captain Asserto, do assert."

But, can the atheist heroes hold out against seemingly overwhelming odds? Will those masters of evil the TV Evangelists join forces with Malevolent Creationists and concoct a cunning plan to destroy them and turn the population into rabid God Zombies?

Keep watching FSTDT for the thrilling outcome to these disturbing events!

"pick up a rock and kill like an ape"

Unfortunately stoning is a human thing too, even if it's savagery.

So that's the common creationist claim that accepting evolution would imply acting like other animals. But fortunately, human animals have ethics and law codes, so the argument is a deceiving fallacy. On the other hand, we're animals too, it's not very difficult to see that we're mammals, a newborn sure knows where to feed.

We're made out of meat.

They're made out of meat

With credits to Terry Bisson for the original short story.

Wyatt Junker #fundie libertydwells.com

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