[Let's keep it real. No one is under any illusions about a man being pulled from the street and brutally blowjobbed and plough in the anus by the fists of masked female rapists. That is definitely rape because OBVIOUSLY no consent was provided.

Now if he was in the bar, he was provided drink after drink by an inticing lady who slowly proceeded to allow him to willingly take the drinks and drink the alcohol and then suggest they go back to her place and then she proceeds to undress him while he's too drunk to resist or consent and have sex with him. Is that rape?]

The reason punishment is harsh, and that it is considered serious business, is because of the old definition - which is pretty much the violent, non-consensual stuff... and born of a time when marriage was sacrosanct.

The current definition includes any number of cases that are basically meaningless and in no way deserving of any particular punishment... like the case in question. Punishing the woman is more retardedness than justice. There is no real victim, and in the real world, the man would never charge her with rape (unless he's crazy and wants to be laughed at)... but it would still be legally defined as rape.

Which points to the basic fact that the law has become funky and far removed from the source that made if meaningful. Human systems have a tendency to become corrupt and perverted after a certain point (mostly because individual human intelligence is such a marginal thing).

[Naturally. Lack of ability to consent in your example above is rape.]

The problem is with the expanded use of the word "rape" with all its existing connotations, so that it is seen as something horrible that has happened to someone, for which we as a society want to exact vengeance on their behalf - as well as strongly deter anyone from engaging in such activities... Thus rapists spending years in jail and generally having their lives destroyed for all practical purposes by being registered as sex offenders and likely not being able to get decent jobs in the future, etc. etc... and everyone being fine with the amount of harm visited on these living incarnations of evil.

... Except obviously, this guy hasn't come to any harm that justifies horribly harming someone else, or declaring them an ungodly evil to be forever maligned and rejected by everyone, on his behalf.