My toilet flushed 4x for no reason....
Sometime during the wee hours of the April 1st morning, my toilet flushed 4x for no reason.
Someone, I can't remember who, on RITA [forum] mentioned that God has a great sense of humor. Could He had been telling me that 4/4/2010 could be the date of our Rapture/or could this mean something else altogether?
77 comments
Well,4 4 2010 has fucked off and still no rapture,so it must mean something else,it could mean your toilet is becoming impatient with you,it keeps wanting you to take a dump,stick your peabrain head firmly into the bowl,flush and repeat 3 more times,god botherer!
Huh? Lady, that was Satan, telling you to invest in Lysol Toilet Freshener. He tried four ME DAMNED TIMES AND YOU STILL DIDN'T GET THE MESSAGE!
*sighs*
Some people are so damn dense...
And those crazy atheists wonder why I'm angry all the time!
Things it could have been:
a very lame April fool's joke,
a room mate with a weak bladder
a cat who has learned the joys of toilet flushing
plumbing problems
god playing an April fool's joke
Well, I'm convinced, the most realistic and probable explanation is that goddidit.
"Someone, I can't remember who, on RITA [forum] mentioned that God has a great sense of humor. Could He had been telling me that 4/4/2010 could be the date of our Rapture/or could this mean something else altogether?"
You need a plumber, not a preacher.
Someone, I can't remember who, on RITA [forum] mentioned that God has a great sense of humor.
No, no, the song lyric goes:I don't want to start any blasphemous rumourssick sense of humour
Meanwhile, a starving child was praying for food, a cancer patient was praying for a miracle, and a woman was praying for her husband to stop beating her, but god was flushing SisterNChrist's toilet. Sounds about right.
Could He had been telling me that 4/4/2010 could be the date of our Rapture/or could this mean something else altogether?
* Checking calendar to make sure *
And yes, it means something else. It means you have a shitty toilet although one with a higher IQ then yourself!
I don't think this is a poe. These people are so looking forward to the end that the most mundane things in the world are SIGNS from GOD given to them because they are SPECIAL!
I hate to think how this woman reacts when a lightbulb burns out.
Yes SisterNChist. Gawd WAS telling you the rapture was coming. GAWD was trying to get you to repent and be saved. BUT YOU DIDNT AND YOU MISSED THE RAPTURE YOU FUCKING HEATHEN SINNER, YOU WILL BE GOING TO HELL FOREVER TO BURN!!!!!
I crack myself up sometimes......I mean....thought the toilet was some sign of the rapture. Could be POE, but then again, I dont think a POE could come up with something this ridiculous.
So today my toaster popped out two pieces of burnt toast, right?
I'm pretty sure this means the world will burn in 2 days.
"God has a great sense of humor. Could He had been telling me that 4/4/2010 could be the date of our Rapture/or could this mean something else altogether?"
Well, it shows that God is British (with our toilet humour), and he's taking the piss out of you!
Or you're lying for Jebus. A friend of mine is an expert plumber, and he's never heard of that happening, no matter what the air/water pressure circumstances, nor the specific flushing mechanism - mechanical or electro-mechanical (especially those Japanese toilets).
Essentially he's saying you're talking out of your arse SisterNChrist. So why not just park your bum on that karzi. It's the only way you'll be listened to.
@LC
"So what do you call future divining using a toilet? Privomancy? Lavomancy?"
I call it 'Talking to God on the Porcelain Phone'. Which I've done on a few occasions after a dodgy curry & heavy night on the sauce. The after-effects were always a Revelation; a bad omen of a plague of frogs - in the head - and looking like the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse had galloped all over me. Repeatedly.
X3
My loo has gone off by itself before. It may be something in the tank that prevents a good seal. You could call a plumber to be sure, and potentially save on the water bill. Instead, you referred it to a fundy blog. FAIL!!
That certainly raised a smile. Not just a vertical one, either.
As omens go it beats "a horse, with two heads and two bodies" any day.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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