We used to have a practicing satanist who was a pastor at one of the local churches. He tried to attack me and my kids by using witches lay lines and silver cords to come into our dreams to try to scare us. We knew who it was right away, (he showed his face in the dreams, and he attacked us each in chronological order that night, and when we woke up from his attack, he was in the room with us,) so we cast him out and burned his lay lines and silver cords, and once we did this, he immediately left us in peace. When I asked the Lord what was going on, He told me that this pastor was an undercover satanist. It made sense, for my kids always seen him as being covered with a big black dense cloud. He was one of those pastors that always preached how the power of God was no more, and only existed in Jesus day. Sadly the people ate up his words like it was manna from the desert.
37 comments
"When I asked the Lord what was going on, He told me that this pastor was an undercover satanist."
Reminds me of a comic strip about a bunch of satanists having just torched a church. In triumph, they head back to their satanist counterpart to a church, only to discover upon arrival that some priests have torched it!
These loonies think celebrating Christmas will lead Christians to hell. The No1 day of the Christian calendar is really for Satanists. Is nothing sacred?
When it comes to fundies you can guarantee that there is always someone more fundie than you.
Don't know much about the ley line woo, but I do know you can't burn some magnetic field in the earth.
Anyway, please start slandering this pastor; it will bring you one step closer to the involuntary commitment you need.
I thought only Githyanki Silver swords or astral cyclones could sever ones silver cord...
I am reminded of one of the Sword of Truth books (yes, I know, I know), Blood of the Fold. Big inquisitor type eventually comes to the conclusion that the Creator (read: God) is a Baneling (read: Servant of the Keeper [the Devil]). It wasn't long before he declared himself the new god.
This Dumbass Dreamer seems to be following that trail of reason. Thank the Creator that they lack charisma, otherwise we'd end up with another Jonestown on our hands...
(Frank)
"The No1 day of the Christian calendar..."
**BZZZZZT!!** Sorry, but that answer, "Christmas", is incorrect. The correct answer was "Easter".
-50 points for you.
I think you mean "ley lines", and no, it doesn't mean what you think it means, and no, you didn't burn them.
@LAchlan: I figured it out one sentence in.
Sometimes I see a fundie I think is genuinely mentally ill (e.g., Anna Diehl and Vincent Cheung are likely sociopaths). I think Dreams of Dunamis here is schizophrenic.
And your evidence any of this is actually true is...?
When I asked The Lord what was going on with your post, he said you're full of shit and a complete fucking idiot.
So there.
What kind of church is this that has a pastor who says "how the power of God was no more, and only existed in Jesus day."?? And I've heard of "LEY (not "lay") lines" before, they're "hypothetical alignments of a number of places of geographical interest"...how on earth can someone attack someone with one of those, or burn one? That's like if I said to someone that I'll hit them with a line of longitude...
He tried to attack me and my kids by using witches lay lines and silver cords
I used to think this woman was just strange. Now I'm beginning to think that whole website is one big Poe joke. This is just too bizzare.
Ley lines are mysterious meridians of energy that criss-cross the Earth. They're a metaphysical geological thing. You can't attack some one with it anymore than you can attack someone with a water aquifer.
Are you sure your kids aren't messing with ya? Your whole blog is about as believable as the phrase "Tommy Wiseau is a highly talented auteur who could put DeMille, Kubrick & Spielberg to shame!" or "Clara Peller was the biggest sex-symbol of the 1980s!".
Now, if you don't shut up, I'll use my witchy powers to haunt your dreams "bonk bonk you on head" with the North Pole!
@ Azereaux: Tobias Brogan, Lord General of Blood of the Fold.
Whenever I heard him talk, I heard a rather young crusader type with a heavy southern accent.
Dunamis here seems she'd be his ideal wife.
I'm loving this guy or gal. Hopefully, he or she's a part of the carefully monitored fundie entertainment division, FRRmedco (Fundie Rubber Room Media Corp). As long as he or she can't escape, I'm happy. She makes reality seem that much more real and sanity that much more sensible. And She makes me feel ever so grateful that I haven't been infected by the Bible God lunacy plague.
A practicing satanist as a pastor? Don't your holy book say something about lying, Dumbass?
You do know that your brain is responsible for your dreams, right? You dreaming of him says that you think of him, not the other way around.
@ Giveitaday
My money's on BOTH.
We used to have a practicing satanist who was a pastor at one of the local churches
No, you didn't, you lying lunatic.
Lay lines? Is that some kind of phone number you call to get sex or something?
What you mean is ley lines, Nightmares of Dumbass.
Your argument is invalid from the moment you speak of ley lines and silver cords as physical objects. They are not. You can no more burn them than I can set fire to your faith, or your feelings. If you're going to make up stories about people like my boyfriend, at least research your argument before making it.
"come into our dreams to try to scare us" "a big black dense cloud"
I never knew that the Tantabus would affect you in that way, after watching the "MLP:FiM" episode "Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep?".
And Princess Luna as Jesus ? It makes sense, really; Mother (Fausticorn), Daughter (Celestia) and Holy Dreammaker: the Trinity .
And Creator of "MLP:FiM", Lauren Faust, is Jewish , therefore...! /)^3^(\
@Swede
"A practicing satanist as a pastor? Don't your holy book say something about lying, Dumbass?"
Especially if said 'Holy Book' he happened to be using was the KJV.
Eh, Jerry...?! >:D
when we woke up from his attack, he was in the room with us
Why didn't you call the police, you liar?
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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