www.hineni.org

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

In an article published in the New York Times Magazine Section written by Noah Feldman, a Harvard University professor, product of a Modern Orthodox Day School in Brookline, Mass., he scored his alma mater for not accepting his marriage to a non-Jewish woman. Now, there is chutzpa and there is chutzpa, and this is a chutzpa that crosses the line!

It is one thing when an individual succumbs to the many enticements of his society or allows his yetzer hara to get the best of him, but it's something else again to flaunt this desecration in everyone's face, and more, to point an accusatory finger at all those who refuse to endorse it...that's colossal chutzpa! And that is exactly what Feldman did. He excoriated his alma mater and the Modern Orthodox community it represents for refusing to accept or acknowledge his gentile wife [...] all this to justify his betrayal and to exact vengeance on the Modern Orthodox Day School which chose to excise his and his gentile wife's faces from a class reunion photograph.

One cannot help but wonder why the graduate of a Jewish day school, would wish to flaunt his abandonment of his school's teachings in a secular publication like the New York Times. One need not be a psychiatrist to perceive that Feldman is ridden with Jewish guilt which very often culminates in Jewish self-hate. Alas, we have witnessed such manifestations throughout our history - people who forsook our teachings, our values and became turncoats. Their anger and bitterness was such that they were prepared to burn down their own Jewish houses to justify their stance.

[...]

What I find most disconcerting however, is that stories such as these drive yet another nail into the coffin of Jewish intermarriage. Soon after Noah Feldman's plaint was published, articles appeared asking for a more welcoming attitude toward those who intermarried. And mind you, these articles were not written by members of the Reform movement - (they embraced intermarriage long ago). Sadly, they came from traditional sources. Hardly what our young people need to hear in an ever-growing climate of intermarriage.

[...]

My dear Noah:

You were disturbed when your alumni newspaper did not extend a mazel tov upon your marriage to a non-Jewish woman and the birth of your child.. But in all fairness, what mazel tov can there be for the Jewish people when you marry out and bring a child into the world who is not a Jew? There is no mazel tov in the knowledge that there will be no continuity for your seed..... that you will be the last Jew on your family tree. There is no mazal or joy in that. There is no mazel tov for your zeides and bubbies, who sacrificed and were prepared to die so that our people might live. No, Noah, there is no mazel tov - there is only pain - pain for your family, pain for your people, pain for your G-d.

The Jewish people need you, Noah. May Hashem grant that a miracle occur and you somehow find your way back home to Torah.

Richard Altabe #fundie hineni.org

While the at-risk behavior of boys has leveled off somewhat, there has been a dramatic increase in the at-risk behavior of girls.

[...]

It begins at a young age. Internet chatting seems innocent for a ten year old girl. After all, they are just talking with their friends the same way we used to use the phone. But it is not innocent. Neither are the movies that they rent for "innocent" sleep over parties. Relationships with males are idealized, discussed and fantasized. No different than 30 years ago? Watch them. PG-13 films and TV programs that would have been banned in a different generation are seen by "everyone" today. Sooner or later the internet chatting involves the boys. Chatting leads to meetings on Friday at the pizza store. Eighth grade comes and while parents may be dreaming of getting their bright young lady into the "top" yeshiva, they have failed to realize that subtle changes have occurred in a few short years. Unknowingly, these girls enter a high school admissions pool designed to weed out the "bad" girls. Faced with rejection and no school to attend, these girls become depressed and their parents frantically search for answers. While the system may reject these girls, the boys do not. In many cases, the relationship spins out of control and the results are disastrous.

[...]

If our girls attend 10 years of yeshiva and their minds are still on romantic novels and inappropriate movies in the eighth grade, something must be terribly wrong.

[...]

Parents also need to listen better and become involved more. We don't have to send our child to a questionable party or social event just because "everyone" is going. We need to be more vigilant about the material that enters our homes and the access our children may have to inappropriate material on the internet. Even if we may believe that our computer is blocked, our children can access material in very creative ways. If we allow our children computer privileges they must be very carefully monitored. We should check our children's buddy lists, making sure we know each child on the list. We must keep the computer in a public space so that we can monitor internet activity better (even adults need to monitor their own internet use!).

Lastly, we need to learn to communicate better with our daughters. It is especially important for fathers to learn to relate better to their daughters. If daughters become alienated from their fathers, to whom will the turn to receive male affection? Who will provide for a daughter's self-esteem if her father has become detached? Fathers must spend time with their daughters listening and discussing their issues.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

Last week, I focused on the group Women of the Wall and its choice of the Kotel as a battleground, donning tallis and tefillin and conducting services in the manner of men. I asked why, if these women are sincerely motivated, they do not hold their services in any of the thousand and one places where they would be welcomed with open arms. I wondered whether their goal is not so much wearing tallis and tefillin as it is taking a jab at the Torah community.

[...]

Our Torah places females on the highest pedestal of respect, esteem, honor, and glory. Why would we need any kind of women's liberation movement? What are we to be liberated from? From our majestic calling of kindling the lights of faith and passing the torch of Judaism to all generations? Can there be any greater glory than that? What are our sisters seeking? What are they protesting?

It is not out of contempt that I'm writing this but rather to sound the alarm, to awaken our people. We are confronted today by challenges that, G-d forbid, threaten to snuff out the very lives of our brethren in Israel and worldwide. At such a time, how can any of us transform the holy Kotel - the remnant of our Temple and the most sacred site we Jews possess - into a place of provocation and infighting?

[...]

One final word to Women of the Wall: My dear sisters, would everyone not be better served if, rather than making a spectacle at the Kotel, disrupting those who come there to spill out their broken hearts and wash the Wall with their tears, you instead built walls of faith and love - walls that would insulate our people from the madness of the world?

Let's stop the nonsense and become serious Jews.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

Baruch Hashem, that pintele Yid has not died in the neshamas of our people. You just have to find it. Take, for example, an exchange I had with an Israeli taxi driver who made "Aliya" from South America.

Taxi drivers in Israel are all philosophers and have opinions about everything that they love to share with their passengers....

"What is your name?" I asked our driver.
"Matthew," he said.
"The name jarred ...it hit me like a ton of bricks.
"Tell me your Jewish name."
"Mattityahu" - he replied.
"Please don't take any offense, but may I tell you something from my heart?"- I asked?
"B'vakasha - please," He said willingly.
"I don't wish to offend you, but do you know that one of the reasons why our forefathers were deemed worthy of being redeemed from Egypt was that they did not alter their distinct Jewish names. Shem Yisroel Kadosh.... the names of the Jewish people are holy. They are rooted in eternity, and reflect our heritage, our destiny, our legacy and our covenant. Just consider that you have come back to the land of your fathers after having been away for nearly two thousand years, and you call yourself Matthew when you have a glorious name like Mattityahu. Do you know who Matthew was? Do you know who Mattityahu was?" - I asked?

Instead of waiting for a response, I went on to explain that Matthew was one of the Twelve Christian Apostles, while Mattityahu was the Kohen Gadol - the High Priest who saved the Jewish people from extinction in the days of Chanukah....and today, you have bartered that holy name for that of a Christian Apostle! Do you understand that?

Our driver, like most Israel taxi drivers, did not lack for words, but now he was silent - the pintele Yid started to work in his neshama, so I continued.

"Tell your family tell your friends, your co-workers, that from now on, they are two call you Mattityahu." And with this, I gave him a copy of my book, "Hachayim Heim Nisayon - Life Is a Test." In Israel, I always carry a copy with me, for you never know whom you might meet and who might need it. By the time we got out of the ca, he had become Mattityahu. Yes the pintele Yid that Jewish spark in every neshama is there.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

[F]or women to assume roles assigned to men would not only be pointless, but wrong, a symbol of rebellion against our tradition and Torah. Many women who in our contemporary society had to battle for equal rights in the economic, social and political arena may have difficulty absorbing this concept. They erroneously believe that, even as in the secular world women have been subjugated, they are also relegated to a secondary position in Judaism, and they wage a battle where there is no battle to be waged. They are unaware of the lofty esteemed position granted to women by the Torah; They confuse Torah with the United States Constitution. Our Torah cannot be amended or voted upon; it is not about rights, but obligations, and it's not about entitlement, but responsibilities. A woman who feels fulfilled only if she can assume a male role is indeed deprived, not only of male commanded mitzvas but of her own unique G-d given gift. It's not being counted in a minyan or wearing tefillin that the contemporary woman needs, but an understanding of her lofty calling within Judaism..

The Torah makes each of us appreciate gender differences so that we may realize our potential and contribute our own unique strengths for the greater good of mankind. G-d created the world as a symphony, endowing each of His creations with its own unique instrument. To demand that every instrument be identical would be disastrous. The trombone cannot be a flute, a violin cannot be a cello; each must play its own part so that the world can function in harmony. This same rule applies in nature. The apple tree cannot be interchanged with the grapevine, nor a blade of grass with the oak. G-d's grand design is fulfilled only when each creation faithfully carries out its appointed calling. Our Torah regards women as the prime movers of the world. Women who are steeped in this tradition feel secure and confident in their Jewish femininity. They do not feel that those who don tefillin or pray with a minyan are superior in their service of G-d. They are content to pray at their own pace and designate their own private time and place for their conversations with the Almighty. If however they do choose to go to shul and pray with a minyan, they do so because they want to benefit from that minyan - there are certain prayers that only can be recited with a quorum of ten men, and a gathering of women, no matter how many, does not constitute a quorum which would permit the recitation of those prayers.

Anonymous #fundie hineni.org

[An anonymous 14-year-old student decries the "lifestyle" of their classmates.]

I live in a good neighborhood and go to a very fine frum yeshiva. There are many shuls, yeshivas and kosher restaurants in our area and one would think it is a great place in which to thrive and grow in Torah. While, Baruch HaShem, many do, many more, specifically teenagers, succumb to the pressure and have become lost.

[...]

It takes only one girl to put a boy's screen name on a good girl's computer and that girl's life could change for the worse forever.

[...]

I don't know if any parents are aware of the amount of time boys and girls spend hanging out together. The most innocent places are turned into hangouts. Places that nobody would suspect. And the fact is many kids have no trouble lying outright and casually telling their mothers they are going one place, when in actuality, they are going somewhere else. Girls and boys go into cars together, they talk to each other on cell phones, they chat constantly with each other on-line. Then they go to school the next day and exchange their stories, making their lives seem enviable and exciting to everyone. Teenagers these days are "dating" and these are kids who are considered "good" kids from "good" homes. And believe me, they are not dating in the hope of getting married.

Probably the worst problem in this whole situation is that much of this is considered to be normal. It's all too common nowadays for girls and boys to talk to each other or hang out together. I hear stories of the best girls talking to boys. It's not even an issue...it's become NORMAL. But this can't be normal. It's not right; it's not the way Jewish young people are supposed to live their lives. I heard a great girl once say that she doesn't think it's bad to hang out and listen to music - it doesn't define who you are. Then what exactly defines you? What has our sick culture done to us?

[...]

The music everybody is listening to these days is totally opposite from everything that our Judaism stands for. It is so common to listen to non-Jewish music that many people don't even think twice about it. It is so easy for kids to burn CD's for their friends who have parents who don't permit them to buy non-Jewish CD's. Teenagers will sit for hours with their music, out of touch with the world, exposed to the disgusting and filthy words found in this music. There is no way that it cannot make an impact on them and the way they act. Indeed, the language that is used and the way that kids will curse everyone and everything is disgusting.

Some girls dress inappropriately and walk around without caring the least. Girls can be ridiculed for wearing stockings and their loosely fitted shirts are mocked at. And it's not just dress, but an entire behavior pattern. They shriek and cackle in the streets. Yet, this is the way to be a "fun" girl. There is a certain carefree, careless attitude. They want to believe that they can do everything they wish, go wherever they want, and no one can stop them. They believe that there is nothing wrong with being out late on any night. If they have to lie to their parents to be where they are, so be it. They rationalize that their parents would never understand anyway. This attitude is carried over to camp as well. Girls are on the constant "lookout" for boys, making up places to meet them, and are always on the phone with them.

[...]

You may wonder how I know all this. I know because people love to talk and I see it going on with my own two eyes. At the same time, I am not a nerd. Baruch HaShem, I have many friends who are like me. I have to say however, that the temptations are strong and it's a struggle every day.

Dr. Patricia Penina Cayne #fundie hineni.org

[T]he fact that there are only 13.3 million Jews in the world cannot simply be blamed on wars and oppression. It is assimilation that has taken its largest toll on our nation's population. Assimilation is the process through which a minority adopts the characteristics of its surrounding culture and loses its own identity.

Assimilation happens slowly over generations. The Rebbetzin [Esther Jungreis] explains that, according to our sages (Leviticus 26:14) assimilation starts when a Jew stops studying the Torah. Once a Jew stops studying, he starts to forget the commandments. Although he still feels spiritually connected to Judaism, he becomes negligent in his observance. He continues to believe that he is a Jew, but feels that it is enough to believe in G-d and keep the holidays. Gradually he stops doing even this. When he remembers his grandparents' or parents' love of Torah, he begins to feel guilty. To ease this guilt, he begins rationalizing that the Torah's commandments are out-dated and irrelevant in modern times. To justify his new anti-Torah beliefs and to fill the emptiness that now appears in his heart, he becomes active in secular causes. The covenant to obey G-d's commandments is forgotten and his Jewish life and family disappear.

The process is complete. In my family, my father's sister and my mother's two brothers have no Jewish descendants. The lineage our ancestors died for is lost. And three entire Jewish families are GONE!

[...]

70% of all secular Jews, G-d forbid, will intermarry and disappear in two generations.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

It happened many years ago. I had just spoken in Portland Oregon. My children were still small, and whenever I accepted an out-of-town speaking engagement, I made certain to catch a "red-eye" flight so that I might make it back in time to give them breakfast and see them off to school.

[...]

I was on the verge of dozing off when a young man approached us. I was really too tired to talk to anyone, but then again, maybe he was someone who had to be reached.

"Are you from Portland?" he asked.

"No, I'm from New York," I replied, "but I was speaking there."

"Where were you speaking?"

"In the local synagogue."

"I don't get involved in any of that stuff."

"Are you Jewish?" I asked.

"I guess I am," he said.

"You only guess?"

"Yeah, it's an accident of birth. Doesn't affect my life one way or another."

Our conversation was interrupted by the stewardess who was distributing the midnight snacks.

"Jungreis," she said, reading the label. "I have you down for kosher... And what would you like to have?" she asked, turning to him.

"I'll take ham and cheese," was his answer.

"You can't have that," I interrupted.

"What do you mean, I can't have it? It's my favorite sandwich."

"But you told me you're Jewish."

"So what!"

"So what? You must be kidding. You signed a contract - you sealed a covenant at Mount Sinai that you wouldn't eat that stuff. You were there. All Jewish souls that were ever to be born were there. As a matter of fact," I added, "looking at you now, I think I remember you. We all pledged to uphold the covenant."

He looked at me in disbelief. "Lady, you know something, you need help and I mean serious help!"

And with that, he picked himself up, walked back toward his seat and told the stewardess as he passed her in the aisle, "That woman is off the wall!"

For the remainder of the flight, he didn't look my way.

At JFK we met once again at the baggage carousel, and he said to me, "You know, what you said is nuts!"

"Listen, my name is Esther Jungreis. Here is my card. We have an organization called Hineni, which means, 'Here I am', ready to serve my people and my G-d. We remind people of that covenant sealed at Sinai. You can check it out. It's all documented in a Book called the Torah. The whole story can be found there. You will see. You really were there. If you need help in your search, let me know. I'd be more than happy to show you."

"I bet you would! But I'm running from you as fast as possible!" And with that, he turned his back and went to find his suitcase.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

[Rebbetzin Jungreis writes to an older woman who is worried about how she and her husband should divide up the estate.]

[W]e live in a world where many of our Jewish sons and daughters are disappearing into assimilation and intermarriage. From your letter I gathered you are a traditional family who go to synagogue from time to time, keep a kosher home, make Shabbos and Yom Tov dinners, have mezuzahs on the doorposts, etc. But this does not guarantee that your future generations will cling to those mitzvahs and remain within the fold.

So try to protect the Judaism of their descendants. You can do this by making provisions in your will for the yeshiva education of all your grandchildren, for establishing a kosher home when they marry, etc. And make it clear that any beneficiary who chooses not to accept these terms will forfeit the money you allocated for this purpose and it will go to a tzedakah of your designation.

May Hashem grant you Yiddishe nachas and shalom bayis from generation to generation.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

[In response to news of a pride parade in Jerusalem:]

Even if the entire world regards homosexuality as a viable life option, we Jews live by a different code of rules. Our standards of morality emanate from our Torah, and not from that which is in vogue. Phrases such as "meaningful relationships", "moral relativism", "majority consensus" or "consensual relationships between adults" cannot suspend our laws. The Word of G-d stands eternally and calls upon man to temper his passions and live in sanctity.

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

[Rebbetzin Jungreis comments on a woman's commitment to Judaism. The woman's family attend High Holiday services, were confirmed, and visited Israel. Her older brother married a non-Jewish woman and her younger brother dates non-Jewish women. Her parents do not particularly object.]

My Dear Friend,

I could almost dub your portrayal of your family's Jewish life, "The American Jewish Tragedy". This is a tragedy that is compounded by the sad fact that the protagonists are not even aware that they are choreographing a tragedy. Please do not feel that what I will now say is in any way a condemnation, but nevertheless, as I said earlier, I feel compelled to comment on the sad reality described in your letter. You, as well as many others are what our tradition refers to as "tinokot shehínaflu bíshevi" - innocent Jewish souls who were never given a true Jewish education and therefore are compared to infants who were kidnapped and did not have the privilege of knowing their real parents. Such individuals have no way of gauging what they are missing or what they have lost. Similarly, Jews who grew up devoid of Torah, who never tapped the vast treasures buried in its every word and letter, who were never nurtured by the Torah's life sustaining milk, have no way of comprehending their deprivation.

[...]

Without our Torah we cease to exist and are quickly swallowed up in the great melting pot of the nations. Intermarriage is the death knell of our people, leaving no memory in its wake, not even a kaddish. I realize that your parents would have preferred that your brother marry Jewishly, nevertheless, they accepted a gentile daughter-in-law for your older brother and are obviously prepared to do the same for your younger sibling, the rationale being that "they don't want to stand in the way of their children's happiness. Never mind that your brothers will be the last Jewish males to carry your family name; never mind that thousands of years of Jewish life will come to an end in them; never mind that which Hitler could not do through the gas chambers, they are willingly, if unknowingly doing to themselves - and it's all justified under the guise of "happiness".

If someone should claim that he feels "happy" taking drugs, would anyone in his right mind accept that rationale? Would we not warn such a person that he is on the path to self-destruction? Similarly, if someone obliterates his Jewish past, should we not warn him that he is committing spiritual suicide?

[...]

Again, I apologize if you find these words hurtful. G-d forbid - that is not my intention. I would never want to cause anyone pain, but in all good conscience, I could not allow your statements to pass without comment. Perhaps someone who reads these words will re-think his vacuous Jewish life, search out his heritage and discover G-d's holy words that were engraved upon his soul at Sinai

Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis #fundie hineni.org

There are so many tragedies befalling us nowadays that it's difficult to keep pace - terrorism in Israel, escalation throughout the world, and now, we have an added tsora - Mordechai Vanunu. For those of you who may not be familiar with the case, Vanunu is a traitor who sold secrets about Israel's nuclear capacity to British newspapers, and now, after eighteen years of imprisonment, he was released spewing forth hatred of his own people and country.

How does such a thing happen? How does a Jew, a citizen of the State of Israel, become a turncoat? How does he betray his own people?

[...]

So what happened to Mordechai Vanunu's Jewish heart? What happened to his Yiddishe neshama? How can a Jew live in Eretz Yisrael, breathe in the air of the Holy Land, behold the return of his brethren from the four corners of the earth, witness the miracle of the beginning of our redemption, and still perpetrate such evil? And perhaps even more perplexing - how could Israel Intelligence, vaunted for its competence and know-how, have allowed Vanunu to be placed in such a sensitive position?

[...]

Israel's intelligence messed up because sadly, those tell-tale signs had little meaning to them. Way before the exposure of his perfidious deed, Vanunu converted to Christianity, participated in pro-Palestinian demonstrations, became a nude artist's model, and joined the Communist Party. Each of these acts should have set off alarm bells, for each is a betrayal of everything that we, the Jewish people cherish and hold dear. To Israelis of secular and leftist persuasion however, such activities are of no concern. They reflect a "liberal, egalitarian" attitude that has become politically correct, and alas, is espoused by far too many. And herein lies the crux of the problem, and herein are to be found the answers to our questions.

An entire generation of Israelis has been raised as citizens of the world rather than as Jews whose hearts throb with the voice of Torah and the faith of our ancestors. They do not recognize the Divine Covenant that bequeathed this land to us as an eternal inheritance. They do not feel the blood of the prophets coursing through their veins. They do not see themselves as links to Sinai. Vanunu and his ilk have no use for the Covenant. Vanunu scoffs at our Torah ideals. He asserts that Jews do not need a state - they can live anywhere in the world. But should they insist on living in Israel, let them do so under Palestinian rule.

I have encountered Vanunus everywhere - Jewish self-haters who grew up without knowing who they are - Jews who were never awakened by the voice from Sinai; Jews who have expertise in every field, but remain Torah illiterates; Jews who drift aimlessly, dabble in every cause, embrace the idols of other nations and remain blind and deaf to the majestic call of their own people. While such Jews (wherever they may be) diminish our people, in Israel, they jeopardize the very existence of the State.