*On what would happen to the Shire if black people showed up*
It would be like giving them free and unrestrained access to this site, total anarchy and disfunction. The Shire would be soon awash with violence and gangs and drugs and there would soon be half hobbit/negroes running around causing all manner of havoc. This would only happen if Sauron had tired of his Orcs and decided to make something even worse, Negroes.
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I've said this before: Hobbits were brown-skinned and nappy- headed (and -footed), with some of the Fallohides as light as olive, but they were assuredly not "white". Galadrial's dust caused some of them to be born with golden hair, which was nonetheless still nappy. None had blue eyes, and certainly they didn't resemble Elijah Wood.
Why would any person want to go to the Shire? There's zero medical care, zero mass communication, zero plumping, zero electricity, and nobody wears bloody shoes.
If black people were written into Tolkien's world, it would have been by Tolkien, who was not a freaking racist. Therefore he would not have made them dysfunctional.
You'll have to write your crappy fanfic yourself, kiddo.
"The Shire would be soon awash with violence and gangs"
See, Saruman tried to take over the Shire... with a LOT of violence and gangs, I might add... leading to free and unrestrained access for the lawless shits with total anarchy and disfunction, unless you dared to resist in which case you got a lot of Law dumped on you... and dare I say a lot of havoc and death.
Of course, you'd only know that if you'd read the fucking books... the films got so much wrong and left out that it's almost insulting, such as there being a huge amount of variation on skin colour in the Shire.
"This would only happen if Sauron had tired of his Orcs and decided to make something even worse, Negroes."
I seem to recall Tolkien writing Mordor and the Orcs in the role of Nazi Germany and the Master Race... are you sure you want to go there with this?
Comparing the wonderous harmony of a site full of useless turds with personality disorders that would probably claw each other to death if they ever met in person to the horrifying chaos of a community of jovial, furry-footed, generally amicable midgets having polite dinners with all their black friends seems like comparing your own piss to 20 year old Scotch... with the piss winning out due to ridiculous beliefs about the Scotch being evil.
Ironically, there *are* dark-skinned peoples in the Lord of the Rings - they live in the south and east of the world and, with almost no exceptions, serve Sauron (http://tolkiengateway.net/wiki/Racism_in_Tolkien%27s_Works#Evil_Men ). There's a lot of argument over 'racism' in LOTR, and a lot of stuff which *could* be manipulated to turn Tolkien into a white nationalist text. Fortunately, most white power rangers don't actually *read* - much less read secondary literature on the classics! - so I think we're good there.
Actually, there are "Negroes" in LOTR. Many of the Southrons are obviously based on Africans. They're not portrayed as savages or inherently evil or any different than the Men of Middle Earth, other than having a different culture. Aragorn even surmises the Southrons helping out Sauron have been blackmailed, forced or brainwashed into doing so. Not that there's something about being black that inherently makes them want to follow Sauron.
Moreover, what's with the general assumption that all black people are anarchic hooligan gangsters? If that were true, wouldn't it kind of hinder their ability to function normally in society, as literally every single black person I've ever known does?
#1526664, I think you hit the nail on the head. They DON'T function normally in society. They cannot speak their views when not amongst their peers without inviting scorn, reprisals, arrests, firing, shunning, or a serious ass-kicking. They must hide on the Internet, and even there, they clearly aren't taken seriously.
The funniest part is that the Stormfronters themselves would wreak havoc on Middle Earth in general(ridiculous notion though that may be), far more than a random bunch of black people. They would probably try to enslave the hobbits or something. Maybe start a genocide. Or try, before being forcibly expunged by some wizard or a group of elves or something.
Tolkien himself said that in the real world, his (nappy-headed) hobbits would be exterminated, or wind up as miserable slaves, which really has happened to the little people of Ituri, upon whom he partly based them.
One of these fantasies is not like the other. Although, double the fantasy, double the fun, presumably. But won't you need an extra large bib?
@#1526454:
I seem to recall Tolkien writing Mordor and the Orcs in the role of Nazi Germany and the Master Race... are you sure you want to go there with this?
Actually, Tolkien denied that and stated that no part of his work was meant as an allegory, as he despised that. (IIRC that was one of his major criticism of his buddy C. S. Lewis’ Narnia books.)
How much he was influenced by his own experiences in WWI and that of his son in WWII is still debatable.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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