Not everyone gets abortions just for kicks. But a lot of people do.
63 comments
Doctor, wait just a minute. Okay, I got the crack pipe going, now start sucking out the fetus.
Thats it....ahhhhhhhhhh what a rush.
Yes! Abortions are the new schoolyard craze that threatens to destroy the lives of our impressionable young sons and daughters. The real problem here is that many children are forced into abortions by PEER PRESSURE, and don't know how to JUST SAY NO. Let us watch a typical example of a youth being coaxed into aborting:
(We open onto a quaint, 1950s, American schoolyard. Little Billy, a typical young boy, is playing a wholesome game of catch with himself. Little Jeffy and his gang of abortion-using hoodlums suddenly enter from offscreen. Little Jeffy catches Billy's ball in midair.)
Little Jeffy: What're you doing there Billy?
Little Billy: I'm just playing a wholesome game of catch.
Jeffy: More like a wholesome GAY of catch!
(Jeffy's gang of hoodlums cackle)
Jeffy: Why don't you put down that sisy little ball and play with the big boys.
(Jeffy pulls a wire coathanger from his back pocket)
Billy: What do you mean 'play with the big boys'?
Jeffy: DURRRRRR...I mean spearing the zygote, poking the egg...
(Billy looks confused)
Jeffy: Getting abortions
(Billy is shocked)
Billy: But my dad said that getting abortions isn't a good idea!
Jeffy: Come on, all the cool kids are doing.
Billy: I don't know...
Jeffy: What's the matter, are you...CHICKEN?
Now, we can see that Little Billy has gotten himself into quite a sticky situation, a situation that many of America's children find themsselves in. Now I want everyone to watch what Little Billy does VERY carefully
Billy: I'm no chicken! You're a turkey!
(Little Billy quickly runs away)
Did you see that? Notice what he did there. He STOPPED, LOOKED at his situation, and then GOT OUT OF THERE. So remember children, if you should find yourselves in a situation like Little Billy's you should STOP, LOOK, and then GET OUT OF THERE! Isn't that right Little Billy?
Little Billy: You're darn right mister!
This message was brought to you by Concerned Children's CousinTed's.
Hi, my name is Superbaba, and I am an abortion addict.
<Hi Superbaba>
It all started so innocent ... just good fun between friends. We would go out Friday nights, get pregnant, and then we would abort. But later ... later it all became so serious. Friday night wouldn't be complete without an abortion, and then we started aborting on Saturday, too. A year later, I was getting pregnant and aborting alone, at my home, every day...
Well, I don't know of anybody who gets abortions for kicks, but if they do, good for them, because I require nourishment (mmmm...fetuses).
JoJoexclaimationpoint is a walking talking reason not to water down sex-ed classes. Being a guy is no excuse thinking that an abortion is some recreational thing. Where will this take us? Let's see.
1. I think abortion should be banned, because people are abusing it for fun.
2. I think we should continue the war in Iraq, because sand is valuable in Peru.
3. I think taxes should be cut because the government's primary fundraiser needs a nose job.
4. I think we shouldn't bother with environmental protection, because my house is newly-painted.
5. I doubt that the national debt will be a problem, since potatoes aren't very cheap.
Anyway, unless we want everyone to think in terms of nonsense or meaningless non sequiturs (which isn't really "thinking" in the normal sense of the word), we'd better educate kids. (My post isn't as good as Cousin Ted's, though. If my post has any spelling errors, then it's Cousin Ted's fault, since I'm still laughing so hard I can't type straight.)
Or we could always let everyone become like JoJoexclaimationpoint. It can't be all bad. Let's sing a song of Pennzoil!
Oh, fuck! He's MY age! Please tell me that most people my age aren't this stupid! Even if you have to lie, tell me that!
I shall allow faith to take priority over reason this one time, and shall deny that an 18-year-old would really think that people have abortions for fun.
Then, since there are plenty of quotes by much older people on this site, I don't mind much. At least there are stupid people of all ages, not just people my age.
EDIT: Oops. Ended up looking at "Joey" instead of "Jojo." How silly.
I vote for this one to get the "Funniest Comments" award.
I'll admit that I've chuckled at other comments, but right now my co-workers are looking at me because I'm honestly tring to stifle my laughter.
"What the...? You just won the world series. Now what are you going to do?"
"I'm gonna have an abortion!"
This is bloody awful!!!!
NO ONE does an abortion because its FUN or for KICKS!!! There is NOTHING about it that is ENJOYABLE!! It is made out of pure necessity!
JoJo has NO IDEA what he (she) is talking about!! Shame, shame, shame!
JoJo, I hate to point this out, but I clicked the link to see the context; sadly, regardless of what point you were making, that particular statement is so absurd that the rest of your argument somehow seems less valid for existing. If you wish to frame a cohesive argument in the future, I suggest you avoid using appeals to emotion (what I assume that was supposed to be), since you lack the rhetorical skills to do so without looking like a jackass.
Jojo, don't lie. You were saying that paralyzed people aren't sentient because you didn't, until I explained it to you, understand the definition of sentient, nor did you understand why fetuses weren't sentient.
But yea, your explanation seems to show that I did not, in fact, take that out of context.
Sierra, I read your comments and I can't believe how anyone can be THAT stupid.
Seriously. I was saying that paralyzed people obviously ARE sentient even though they don't fit the definition. I was using this to point out that fetuses ARE sentient as well even though they don't fit the definition.
And you DID take what I said out of context. Don't be a stupid liar.
AND I was saying that people who REFUSE to use birth control (and use abortion as a form of birth control)and still have sex are the ones that can be said that they have abortions just because they can. Don't be ridiculous.
JoJo I understand what you're trying to say, and the comment you made was still quite possibly one of the most pig-headed, offensive, poorly-worded pieces of dreck I've ever seen. If you cannot see why that comment deserves to be on a website called "Fundies Say the Darndest Things" then you should probably have your state appointed handler explain it to you. I suggest that in the future you learn a little bit about a subject before you start protesting it.
And just for future consideration: Backpeddling really never helps anyone's situation and really just makes the peddler look like an imbecile.
Apparently, even after having the word "sentient" explained to you, you still don't understand it's meaning. There is no condition under which a fetus can be defined as sentient.
Please invest in a good dictionary and have someone show you how to use it.
"You can't communicate if you speak an entirely different language to everyone else - especially when you steal their phonetics."
It's impossible to steal phonetics when you speak another language. Besides, the people on this forum speak english, the same as you.
mad dog???? Is that you?
If you make up your own meanings for words, you are now officially speaking a different language. Jojoish has several different contradictory meanings for the word 'sentient'.
It's a word she stole the spelling and sounds (phonetics) from the English language, but HER word is not part of the English language. Capiche?
(It's impossible to steal phonetics if you're speaking the same language!)
In parts of Canada, abortion is covered under public healthcare. Birth control isn't. Poor people can thus afford abortion, but not birth control.
Oh, how irresponsible of them to be poor.
JoJo, NO ONE does an abortion as a birthcontrol (or "kicks" as you call it)! It is the last way out of a sad, hopeless situation, and what you wrote is a cruel mockery of those who been through an abortion!!! It is nothing you do for "fun". Period.
Hiding your ignorant self-righteousness behind makebelief like "God" is just pathetic!
It is obvious that you are a bit immature and dont know mutch about life, so you need to get into the situation where you have to get an abortion to understand what you are talking about... I wish you luck with that part!
Oh, one more thing: dont call those people who know more about a subject than you do "stupid" or "b*tch" - it says more about yourself than those you slander...
The funniest part about this is when JoJo started posting here.
"Seriously. I was saying that paralyzed people obviously ARE sentient even though they don't fit the definition."
AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
JoJo!, do you have any idea just how much of an idiot you appear to be when you say things like this?
JoJo!: "I was saying that people who REFUSE TO USE BIRTH CONTROL and who STILL HAVE SEX and USE ABORTION AS A FORM OF BIRTH CONTROL are basically absuing the system"
I'm not sure I understand this correctly. What exactly is to "refuse to use birth control"? Having sex without using condoms, pills or other contraceptive measures? Do you think that people who do this think "It's ok, if I get pregnant, I will abort and problem solved"? I don't know what's going on in your city, but I don't know anyone that thinks that way.
Also, if you think that people is abusing the system, people who drives too fast and has an accident is also abusing, right? and people who smokes or drinks too much and then need medicines or surgery, and people who eats lots of fat, and... the list can go on quite a bit.
The government can choose between "Fuck them, it's their fault" and "Let's help these poor stupids even if we are not sure if they deserve it". I think this is the main difference between different governments, call them liberal-conservatives, right-left wingers or whatever.
perhaps I should rephrase myself, Julian. What I sarcastically meant to say to JoJo! is that she was claiming we were speaking different languages like spanish or chinese. Therefore, it would be nonsensical to mix our swahili with her (myspace quality) english.
I'd like to point out to JoJo! that I always check the original thread if I can access it, because I always wonder if the fundy could really be as ignorant or callous or vacuous as that one quotation suggests. Answer in this instance: sadly, yes.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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