Surprise: God defined marriage as a union between one man and one woman. It's in Script.
[Examples of polygamy in the bible]
Wow, not so much as one quote from the Christian NT.
The Jews disobeyed God. It's the same for you and me and them - listen to God or say hello to satan.
[...]
Yep, satan does his best to convince you that you don't need to listen to God.
That's how he gets his fresh meat - finding suckers.
36 comments
hey, hello there, you seem like a likely chap, what's up with the pitch fork? ow, come on admit it, you're just a big old red brute with a heart of gold being maligned by that old geezer there, and we all know he killed a few innocents in his day .... well actually .... more than a few.
O, by the way, can you pick up that guy 'duke' on your way home, he's cherrypicking the Bible, and we all know how old what's his name over there thinks about that.
Where? Where in the bible does it say 'marriage is only a union between man and woman'.
Why is it you Christian Fundies pick and choose what part of the OT you want to pay attention to. How about I make a biblical case for having you put to death for wearing that polyblend shirt>
Folks, please. Duke is a well known net kook. He has spread his silly notions in alt.atheism for years. He is such an idiot in fact, that he has been banned from a.a.'s TQOTM contest.
Don't give him another thought, he's a sad, lonely old man, not long for this earth.
...listen to God or say hello to satan.
It's hard for me to make out what Satan is saying because of the deafening cacaphony produced by his enormous scaly brass testicles slapping me on the ass.
Yep, satan does his best to convince you that you don't need to listen to God.
I love how the ultimate crime in the fundie lexicon is a disregard for anything God has to say.
"You're burning the BIBLE!!??"
Oh, Moral Orel. What a hilarious and realistic show.
Hi, Satan! Nice morning, huh? What? Oh, yeah I know, Tuesdays are always like that. What I am up to? Oh, I'm just on fstdt with all the other heathens, picking holes in some fundie's fallacy-ridden arguments. Sure wouldn't want to be in heaven, that's where all the douchebags are! Yeah, cool, see you beside the lake of fire Sunday - I'll bring potato salad.
Fuck the Bible and do as I say.
So fundies have gone from worshiping God, to worshiping the Bible, to worshiping themselves.
Honestly, they cherry pick the hell out of the OT. I get to the point that I just flat out discount the entire OT whenever they start complaining about it.
So they discount the 10 commandments doing that.
Here are some Christian NT quotes (KJV of course)
"Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman."
"I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I."
Now, do you still want to talk about biblically approved marriage, or do you need another lesson in your religion?
"The Jews disobeyed God"
Thus, according to Romans 11:26-32, even non -religious Jews are going to Heaven, bypassing your precious J-boy - in your 'belie fs' cornerstone John 14:6 - thus contradicting & destroying the 'Word of God'.
All because of their Disobedience.
Well, y'know what else is 'Disobedience'? Homosexuality. Also, Atheism.
Therefore, according to Rom. 11:30-32, we're going to Heaven too, along with those Disobedient Jews.
Moral: The only 'Suckers' are those who haven't read their Bible: properly , as per Isaac Asimov. But then, those who haven't actually read the Bible are the real suckers, via the 'belie fs' fed them by their snake-oil salesmen, preachers/pastors. 'Belie f'. You cannot spell that without the word LIE.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
To post a comment, you'll need to Sign in or Register . Making an account also allows you to claim credit for submitting quotes, and to vote on quotes and comments. You don't even need to give us your email address.
