@gimel
Out of curiosity, are you a believer? I want to make it clear, for the record, that I bear no ill-will towards believers. I just have pretty strong convictions to the effect that I think that human beings should place the well-being of themselves, as a collective (and other forms of life, whenever possible) over the opinions of any self-proclaimed God. If you do believe in a benevolent God, then I can understand why you might think that my line of thinking is missing the point (ie. that God actually DOES know what's best for us in the long run, and that we really would be better off under his care).
It seems to me that, if you are a believer, then you are taking a different stance towards God than the people who wrote the Bible did. I think that's a good thing, personally, but I won't mince words here... I've read the Bible front-to-back myself on more than one occasion, and I don't see how you could possibly walk away from that book with any idea other than that YHVH was the villain. If you believe in him, then it seems to me that you are (well-intentioned though you may be) siding with the bad guys, so to speak.
I'm not going to tell you you're wrong for not being a Biblical literalist, for all the reasons you've already said. However, what is the basis of Christianity if not the Bible? Flawed though it may be, isn't it all you have, really? If the foundation of the religion is a flawed book written by flawed people, then I don't think it deserves to be treated any more seriously than we would treat any other book thusly written. One should not build their Church upon shifting sands, but upon a solid rock, after all.
I'm not trying to attack you; I just want you to be able to take a step back and see it from my perspective.
It's not even that I bear any ill-will towards a hypothetical God, assuming that he/she/whatever actually was benevolent towards us. I am genuinely confused as to how one might come to the conclusion that there is a benevolent God, however. Once again, that's not a personal attack. I'm just saying that my mind can't really wrap my head around it. I imagine it must be a pretty comforting thought, however, even if I don't believe it.