[Just a small sample from this extremely lulzy proof of god's existence.]
Looking back again to Noah's Ark, God told Noah to make the Ark 300 cubits long and 50 cubits wide. Using Ezekiel's formula to convert cubits to inches, we find 300 cubits times 24 inches per cubit is 7200 inches in length. 50 cubits times 24 inches per cubit equals 1200 cubits in width. To find the area, we multiply the length times the width. 7200 inches in length times 1200 inches in width 8,640,000 square inches. Remember the diameter of the sun was 864,000 miles.