<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yYX-N3Ms7hQ&eurl= ">Promotional Trailer for "Purity Balls,"</a> prom-like events where prepubescent girls sign a contract with their fathers pledging to be abstinent until he decides to sell her.
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This is wrong on each level.
The name is wrong - haha, balls
The idea is wrong, dads taking their daughters to dances
The reasoning is wrong - not having a boyfriend is purity
The choice is wrong - Dad chooses his daughters life
This is fucking stupid...
The girl is making a decision that she can't hope to understand yet. Worse still, her FATHER is essantially dictating her life to her. yeah, hes her father, but she has a WILL OF HER OWN and is not a PET!
Whats fucking hypocritical is that im willing to bet that the parents didn't go through this shit, and snuck out at all hours of the night and went to the "Secret love shack" when they were supposed to be grounded.
What absolute fuckwits. No insult can do justice to this display of fuckwitery.
Anyone else thought that the girl talking about giving herself away as a wedding gift to her husband was creepy? Seriously, which selfrespecting human being talks about giving him or herself away as a gift?
And asking young girls to do that is just wrong on all levels.
- They aren't even aware of what abstinance is about. They had the talk, but they do not "know". Chances are that they are just doing it for daddy and mommy or are forced into it.
- If you aren't of legal age you can't sign any contracts. And if you do, they aren't legally binding so the worst that can happen when one of those girls likesa boy and kisses him is that she will feel (really) guilty about betraying daddy. Nice way to make sure that they get emotional scars at an early age.
- Why aren't young boys "encouraged" (read: forced) into this?
- Why deny kids the right to experience what life is all about? Getting hurt is just one part of life which you cannot run away from. To quote someone I don't remember: If you act as if every bumped toe is like Darfur, your kid won't be ready for times when (s)he experiences real adversity.
I have to say that there is a big difference between the usual plead for abstinence and this silly thing. The former is made by all sort of individuals and it´s a personal decision, no matter how we must disagree with their choices. However, this is a distortion of the message of dignity that has been sent to women throughout the twentieth century. One, it´s true that women need affection from their fathers, but it can´t be a substitute of the love one feels for a couple, not even from a brother or a male friend. It´s something different and this prom balls are a farce of a feeling that it´s not real, and I would say it´s, in a way, perverted. You can have a kind of activities father-daughter, as I have squash with my dad, but this is utterly ridiculous. Besides, why men are always free from this type of boundaries?. Again, this guys always say, look Islam is evil with women, but.............they are doing what men in the middle East do, only embelleshing it with a ridiculous fanfarre.
The worst thing, however, is the idea of gift. Even if this can be arguable, theologians have taught for decades that abstinence is for the welfare of the couple and the person who performs it. If she remains abstinent it should be for her welfare, not for his daddy´s. She´s not an object, neither to her husband, nor to her daddy. What if her boyfriend is not a virgin?, or if she´s a widow and remarries?. What, worse off, if she marries somebody who his father doesn´t like?, moreover, how is he going to find somebody IN THE FIRST PLACE?.
And, even if they justify this shit with the slogan, well, these girls have not a good relationship with their fathers(guess why), why is the mother, who bore them, put aside in the process?. Well, my worst fears continue, because the father is a substitute for the boyfriend, EXACTLY IN THE WAY WOMEN WERE CONSIDERED CATTLE IN THE BIBLE.
This is too horrifying for me to do anything except laugh.
And cry. I'm doing that as well.
Ladies! Girls! You are people in your own right and have the right to your own decisions! You don't belong to anyone, not husband, boyfriend, or father!
... what's the betting that at least 80% of these fathers are getting some hanky-panky with a big titted secretary at work?
I had the opportunity to revise the whole material. Girls as young as 7 are initiated in this fanfarre. Amazing. So, sex ed is bad because it makes kids think that sex is ok(which is) but this guys can force girls UNABLE TO BREED, to take a vow they don´t understand?. Besides, let´s see the part of the fathers. What if they have an extra-marital affair?, are they going to be spanked or what?. It´s utterly ridiculous. Or only they have to "trust" their daddies in the sense that they entitle their virginity, not that they believe what they preach?
This is creepy on so many levels. Besides the obvious there are some visuals which do not work in their favor. My favorite is the ending where by the father is going down to one knee and then the screen goes black and the "Clifhanger production" logo appears.
This entire thing is preverted and sick. Where are the mothers or what is wrong with them that they would allow this kind of thing? Further more where are the mother, son purity ball dances? You want to build trust between a father and daughter and yet you show them that you consider the son in higher regard by trusting him to make his own decisions.
This is creepy indeed. A nun who taught us religion in my school told us not to abuse petitions to God when praying. She said that it implies that you´re saying: "well, if you don´t do that, I despise you, you understand". Well, same here. This ceremony indicates that a girl is valued ONLY CONDITIONALLY. Only as long as she remains virgin, she will be fested and valued(that explains why there aren´t boy´s version). Of course, the father and the man, for that matter, can commit impurity and all sort of sins, but he is not the cattle of festing, it´s the daughter. Only that he is gay, but not even that. An idiot in another blog said that EVEN IF HE DOESN´T LIKE IT, the man is the authority in the family. Well, a weird idea of God if HE MADE WOMEN BEAR KIDS IN THE FIRST PLACE.
I have some questions:
Is there a "Purity Ball" for Mother/Son attendence? Do boys sign a "I Promise To Keep My Dick In My Pants" pledge? Or is the onus of "purity" placed entirely on the girls here? The father's sign a pledge, too, to protect and guide their daughters, but what happens if they break it? Do the girls get to go out a screw? What do they do if the father is the one who wants to screw her? Half of the girls in my inner-city classroom have no father's present in their lives, are they allowed to go out and hump their little brains out since, obviously, girls need a "daddy" to protect them from their own, brainless, moronic impulses and behavior...
They need to correct their name: Care-Net my ass, more like Pedodaddy-Net!
Best case scenario, the girls are old and smart enough to realize this is weapon-grade BS and just go through the motions to placate fundie daddy until they're old enough to get the fuck away, but otherwise the consequences can range from ridiculously cocooned girls kept "pure and innocent" (read: stupid and ignorant about the world, society, their body,etc.) who never really grew out of their Oedipus/Elektra complex to pure and simple incest.
I'm particularly worried for the little ones, it really feels like pedophile grooming. And after that they dare to accuse gays of trying to recruit little boys...
prom-like events where prepubescent girls sign a contract with their fathers pledging to be abstinent
Sounds like a good idea so far...
until he decides to sell her And here's where it crashes and burns.
Now would you, please, make balls where mothers take their sons all dressed up and explain them that women aren't objects but people?
Would that be too much to ask or are we back to blaming it all on women?
Oh, but no one has mentioned the best part - the voice-over where the man says that his teenaged daughter asked if there was something wrong with her because she isn't interested in boys. Guess what, honey, you're probably gay.
The most incredible thing is that, at least in the net, negative comments are the norm, even between observant Christians. In general, they critisise the pedophile overtones of the event(even if there isn´t actual incest going on), the sexism of the act and the fact that they, while critisising sex-ed, force children who genuinely don´t understand what the whole stuff is about, to make a pledge they will be unable to keep. One thing is to make a virginity pledge(which 88% of the pledgers don´t fulfill but, after all, it´s up to them), when the person is more or less conscious and this shit.
Oh, but no one has mentioned the best part - the voice-over where the man says that his teenaged daughter asked if there was something wrong with her because she isn't interested in boys. Guess what, honey, you're probably gay.
"Occam's Razor Would Disagree" redux. Good point - I noticed it too.
My dad left the "facts of life" speech to my mom, but he did teach me about Murphy's Law. With that in mind, I managed to avoid getting pregnant or infected, and that's "pure" enough for me.
I can´t wait to tell you that I have read an interview from the guys who organise it. When somebody asks them, why not purity balls for boys, they say THAT IT´S BECAUSE GIRLS HAVE MUCH MORE PRESSURE THAN THE BOYS IN THIS SUBJECT. Honestly, in which world do they live?. Women have MUCH MORE PRESSION yes, than men, but to keep themselves virgin, not the other way round.
Matilde "When somebody asks them, why not purity balls for boys, they say THAT IT´S BECAUSE GIRLS HAVE MUCH MORE PRESSURE THAN THE BOYS IN THIS SUBJECT."
Where does this pressure come from, usually? That's right; from the boys. Why not focus on the boys then, and make them commit to these stupid purity vows? Then the girls will have less pressure, and the boys and their mothers might have bonded a bit.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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