People who are in the path of tropical storm Issac should protect their loved ones, their animals and their property by rebuking the storm. See the example from Luke 8:22-25. It is also in Matthew and Mark.
22 Now it came to pass on a certain day, that he went into a ship with his disciples: and he said unto them, Let us go over unto the other side of the lake. And they launched forth.
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An old Klingon story.
Long ago, a storm was heading for the city of Quin'lat. Everyone took protection within the walls except one man who remained outside. Kahless went to him and asked what he was doing. "I am not afraid," the man said. "I will not hide my face behind stone and mortar. I will stand before the wind and make it respect me." Kahless honored his choice and went back inside. The next day, the storm came, and the man was killed. Kahless replied, "The wind does not respect a fool".
OK So Jesus, who, according to Nicea is God, rebuked the wind and water. For CGL, or any other Christian to rebuke the same forces is blasphemy. I mean, humans are not God - no?
@ Rijaden
they think they are already on the higher ground - morally at least. Others differ and see them for what they are...
People who are in the path of tropical storm Issac should protect their loved ones, their animals and their property by rebuking the storm
As opposed to evacuating or seeking shelter somewhere, right?
Doesn't Pat Robertson say goofy stuff like this too. You're just like Pat Robertson.
Though you would take that as a compliment, no doubt.
Also, in the thread, a certain Halossellar raised a good point.
Maybe God thinks the Republican National Committee is evil.
How To Repel Tropical Storms.
Do not fear Isaac or other Holy expressions of disapproval. Instead, keep calm and be practical. Resort to magical incantations.
1. Shove a clove of garlic up your arse, and one up each nostril.
2. Say the following, "Jesus, I command that thy Father's righteous tempest be delayed until He hath achieved greater proficiency with His aim."
3. When, as is inevitable, Jesus can't hear you over the roaring sound of the storm, then cower in terror.
4. As the hurricane blows you into the air like a raptured moron, curse those imbeciles in San Francisco who have angered the Sky Beast.
5. Soil thy undergarments.
@Xotan
Naughty, naughty, Isaac! (Spank, spank). Now, go sit in the corner and no ice cream tonight!
Yes, fundies, stand out and rebuke the storm.
We'll pass out the Darwin Awards later.
(solomongrundy)
What was his name?
Eh, Isaac was a pussy as storms go. No floods. No massive property damage. We didn't even lose electricity. Just a curfew that might not have been that necessary, a tree knocked down in the middle of a road and, in my neighborhood, a few dead branches that probably needed to come down anyway.
Yes, I'm going to stand outside while a hurricane is coming at me, and wag my finger at it yelling, "Shame on you! Shame!"
Clearly that is a better idea than actually protecting my home and family through typical storm-preparedness measures.
Yeah, you do that. Don't bother to board up your house, gather supplies or do anything proactive. Stand out in your yard with your bible, face the storm and rebuke it.
Then tell us how that turns out for you.
"Natural selection, man. It's the bottom of the fucking food chain."
So how's life after Issac treating you? Maybe when the next Katrina appears, you can tie yourself to a tree at Ground Zero and attempt to pray the storm away with a bible in hand. Yep, that's sure going to end well!
Yeah, sure. As if Christians have never prayed for a hurricane to go away, but had all their property destroyed anyway.
Maybe if I had Jesus staying at my house I might try rebuking the storm, but otherwise I'll take precautions by jumping into the storm shelter.
Yes prayer solves everything! That's easy to say when you live nowhere near the Gulf & never have to worry about hurricanes.
Isn't Isaac a biblical name-spelled ISAAC? Why do these trogs keep spelling it wrong? Of all names for them to constantly misspell.
I always plan my disaster strategies on mythical books, too. I'm sure my cats would be just fine in a tornado or earthquake if I just rebuke the storm. Luckily for us, we don't live in an area that has a lot of tornadoes or earthquakes... :\
(solomongrundy)
That wasn't a riddle. *chuckles* In the ST:TNG episode from which you got that quote of Kahless telling the story about "not standing before the wind", Gowron (believing Kahless to be an impostor) responds by challenging his story, asking what the name was of the man outside the city.
SPOILER ALERT:
FANS OF THE SHOW "ROME"
Don't worry pullo, we are perfectly safe. a very good offering was made to triton before we set sail.
(For those of you who dont know/care, this was when marc antony set sail accross the mediteranean for greece, to support and reinforce caesar.[for those of you who still dont know, approximately all of marc antonty's ships/soldiers were detroyed/killed by an extremely violent storm])
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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