WARNING_FOR_ALL_CHRISTIAN_CHURCHES_IN_THE_UNITED_STATES
Warning: United States now officially under Satan rule...Churches can not expect divine protection
THIS IS A WARNING FOR ALL CHRISTIAN CHURCHES: CASH YOUR BANK ACCOUNTS, MOVE MONEY WHILE YOU STILL CAN, SELL YOUR PROPERTIES WHILE YOU STILL CAN, AND MOVE OUT WHILE YOU STILL CAN.........THERE WILL BE NO DIVINE HELP FOR CHURCHES IN THE UNITED STATES.....NOW THE LAND IS SATAN'S LAND....GET OUT THERE IS STILL SOME TIME..
23 comments
Well, with most of the secular democracies now pro-gay, and those that aren't being encouraged to be, it leaves you with Russia, Africa and the Middle East as prospective locations.
Enjoy
Be warned, you will want to avoid the following countries, however:
The Netherlands
And soon enough:
Slovenia
Your world is growing smaller.
Na na naaaa na.
God must be quite a lame duck. He can't protect churches anymore? The only places that have been constantly kissing his ass in what is now Satan's land?
If your fire insurance behaved like that you'd sue them :-)
What makes you think that country will accept you? Do you gladly accept the Mexicans trying to move to the US?
Doesn't the Bible tell you to sell all your possessions and give the money to the poor? Why haven't you done that yet?
By all means, move out of the US, although I hate to inflict you on other countries. It's too bad your God is so ineffective that he can't provide any divine protection for his followers, but he's been fairly useless every since that iron chariot thing.
GOOD! GET OUT OF THE COUNTRY! MOVE TO RUSSIA OR UGANDA!
GIVE US RUSSIA & UGANDA'S GAYS, FEMINISTS & LIBERALS WHILE YOU'RE AT IT!
OUT! OUT! RAUS! SORS! SCRAM! BEAT IT! VAMOOSE! GET O-U-T OUT!
MOVE MOVE MOVE! THANK YOU! OUT!
"CASH YOUR BANK ACCOUNTS, MOVE MONEY WHILE YOU STILL CAN, SELL YOUR PROPERTIES WHILE YOU STILL CAN ..."
... and give everything you own to the poor, right?
CASH YOUR BANK ACCOUNTS, MOVE MONEY WHILE YOU STILL CAN, SELL YOUR PROPERTIES WHILE YOU STILL CAN
Because Gawd won't help you if you're broke.
abandon the Country as you still can, move to another country
Yes, yes YES, PLEASE!!! I hear Uganda is nice this time of year. Then we can tear down your megachurches and use that land for something useful. Something which will actually produce tax revenue.
Great Disappointment round deux. I'll try not to laugh too hard. Maybe with all these assholes gone, Christianity can get back to helping people, being charitable, and spreading decency instead of being used as a shield for bigots to hide behind.
Please disenfranchise and bankrupt yourselves. It's not like we don't know the outcome.
“Warning: United States now officially under Satan rule...”
“Churches can not expect divine protection”
"United states now is Satan's land, Christian Churches no longer will have divine protection..”
"THERE WILL BE NO DIVINE HELP FOR CHURCHES IN THE UNITED STATES.....”
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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