Can you get pregant from a toilet seat?
How long does semen last when not inside a woman? Does it die instantly? I get worried I may have gotten my sister pregnant if any of my sperm got on the toilet seat we share. I did not mean to do this, and know to be more careful next time. I am not ready to have kids, and I don't want to go to jail.
111 comments
this is why we need sex education,
oh, and if you share a toilet and then jack off on it, clean the dam thing up! It's common courtesy you twat
Haw haw haw, thar, BillyBob, ya'll makin sum youngins with DaisyMae! Blame it on the terlit seat's wut I allus do - haw haw haw.
This... is just sad.
Almost as sad as the time a friend of mine was worried he might have gotten his girlfriend pregnant because he spooged himself while they were making out.
They were both fully clothed, and wearing jeans, according to the tale. Twas quite silly.
Aw, I was hoping that the first line was a lead-in to one of those "Dangers of masturbation"-type stories abstinence groups like to throw around. *sigh* Anyway...
A) Gross...seriously. Masturbation's not a sin, but failing to mop up after probably is.
B) Basic sex education would do you and others like you a great service. Judging by the forum your posting on, though, any mention of sex in school would be "of teh Debble!"
C) Why on EARTH would anyone, let alone you, suspect you're responsible if your sister got pregnant? I'm not being sarcastic. Couldn't she just be a whore? Now, I'm being sarcastic.
"I am not ready to have kids, and I don't want to go to jail." My life in a nutshell? Check.
I can only imagine the blood-curdling scream that would issue from that hapless girl at the moment she realizes she's just sat down in her brother's spooge.
Will it get her pregnant? Pretty much impossible unless she has a very odd way of sitting on the toilet. Still, no shower in the world is going to wash away that memory
To misquote an old saying: "If you sprinkle when you fap, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie."
By the Spaghetti Monster's noodly appendage, you are a fucking retard, boy. Never seen a better argument for compulsory sex ed in schools.
Edit: Thought of a better one: "If you sprinkle while you fap, wipe it up, you dirty twat!"
Ah heh heh. I'm done making up filthy rhymes now.
DON'T WHACKOFF ON THE FUGGIN TOILET THEN NOOB
Besides she would have to have her vagina on the toilet [Which I believe is difficult considering the usual position of toilet-sitting] and you would have to have to left a significant amount on there.
Ew.
*facepalm*
Looks again....
*headdesk*
I did a paper on teenage sexual misinformation for my first year psych. His sister is probably some girl saying that she doesn't know how she got pregnant, and the brother suffering from sin-guilt for wanking in front of Jesus.
This is why sex education is so important. Unfortunately there's a chance that his sister doesn't know how she got pregnant. Because there are some fucked up confusion out there when kids are given abstinence only education.
Then there's the chance that it was someone in the family that knocked her up, and she just doesn't want to say.
Or there's the chance that this guy's just a Poe.
"How long does semen last when not inside a woman?"
You say that as though that's where it cums from.
"Does it die instantly?"
lol no.
"I may have gotten my sister pregnant "
@Antichrist: I'm not sure how you think it's a girl who got pregnant and also narrating it about getting her sister pregnant.
I just can't accept that this isn't a poe. Also, the phrasing isn't in any way fundyish -- stupid and ignorant, yes, but I don't see any variety of fundyism involved here.
You can get pregnant from air.
This is something you fundies don't know, since you get your larnin's from ignorance based education, but sperm can fly through the air, cruising around looking for an egg to fertilise. This is how fundie virgins get unexpectedly pregnant.
Well, if she does, by some off-chance, you deserve it, dickweed. Also, clean off the toilet seat if you're gonna jack off on it, for gods' sake. It's a hygiene thing.
By the way, they can't. We need better sex ed. Thanks for being a poster-child.
1) That's disgusting. Clean off the toilet when you wack off on it.
2) She probably won't get pregnant. Why the hell would her vagina be on the toilet seat?
3) Why would you go to jail?
This has to be someone trying to make a statement about how dangerous it is to leave young people without a proper understanding of sex and how their bodies work... If not, then this is just retarded.
If you're going to jack-off into the toilet, at least lift the seat up, for the love of god.
Stupid. Horribly stupid...but not fundie. No fundie elements besides stupidity, and stupidity is universal and knows no group barriers. Just 'cause it's on Christian Forum's doesn't mean it's fundie. Tons of non-fundie morons have the stupid, stupid belief you can get pregnant this way.
Also...that swimming pool thing? Totally true. I, like, heard it from Janice on Myspace! OMG!
The most stupid, shallow and ignorant person I've ever met. If it were true, the current population wouldn't be 6 billion people but much more. And of course, the basic rules wouldn't just confine to abstinence and condoms. Yes, the sperm can survive 5 days provided that it's INSIDE THE WOMB. Otherwise, it dies inmediately. Second, even in the toilet, the way women pee makes it impossible for the semen to get inside the woman's body. Third, what on earth are you and your sister doing in the toilet, for God's sake?
Not fundie, just ignorant.
I used to worry that I could get pregnant from taking a bath in the same tub my brother used. We didn't have much in the way of sex ed in my school.
sperm will last for about 3 days inside her, and outside...well not very long, as u seem like a seasoned wanker then you will know that it drys...this is dead sperm.
in the 3 days inside her bodies defence will attack your sperm and kill most of it.
unless she decides to lube up a sex toy with your sperm and put it deep inside her you'll have no problems.
also next time u jerk off do it in a public toilet then theres no chance of you getting a guy pregnant (joking)
yeah just stay away from toilets in general really...AND USE A TISSUE AFTERWARDS!
ID82: I'm very very concerned with his last line "I am not ready to have kids." It's almost like he's saying it's ok to have kids with your sister but he's just not the right age or maturity level for it.
And if having children with his sister is illegal in his state, then I can see how he would be afraid of going to jail.
Ah, proof that religious based 'abstinence only' keeps kids in ignorance.
And the Fundies wonder why the bible belt has the highest rate of teen pregnancies and STDs.
When my sixth grade teacher was giving us a quiz in sex ed, she asked us this question. Almost all of the class giggled "no". And she said, "thats right - this is not a way you can get pregnant. But you can occasionally contract other diseases off public toilet seats, so always be careful!"
Comprehensive Sex Ed would have solved jsu5381m's problem. End of story.
*laughs real hard*
...*sighs* Okay, I feel sorry for this poor boy. This is why sex education is needed and these parents need to get over their "religious fears" and teach!
in the meantime...*resumes laughing*
@Mister Spak
I strongly suspect Poe.
But if not: There's one hilariously cruel response, from a gaara4158: "oh dude yeah, that happened to my cousin. it's a 50-50 chance man, good luck!"
"Can you get pregant from a toilet seat?" No. You cannot
Now go take 6th grade over again, Only this time STAY AWAKE!!!
Probably he's a poe, stupid and misinformed or rather, I feel, feels guilty about his "deeds" in the toilet.
The mis-information out there is astounding. I remember going somwhere when I was in my teens with my sister and her friends and her friends' mom warning all of them to put down "tons of toilet paper on the seat" if they had to use the ladies' room to prevent what was still called VD. That myth has been debunked, as no cases of STDs are known to have been transitted that way. Most viruses live only a short time outside of the human body. It's been said a lot of trees have been sacraficed to this urban legend.
Spermatozoids, NOT SEMEN, die within hours or minutes if outside a woman´s body. Moreover, tell us how it can get INSIDE her vagina(unless you´re hiding something)
Oh, the fun of abstinence-only education!
Why would you go to jail, regardless of all the other crap you spout? Sharing the same toilet is not a misdemeanour nor a felony, as far as I know.
How did your semen end up on the toilet seat, btw? Why did you not clean it off, or better yet, raise the seat when you do your business, whatever that business is?
1st...Abstinence only works 99.99% for the time according to The Virgin Birth so why ask
2nd...Masturbation is condemned by your religion, so why are you doing it?
3rd...You are an idiot if you don't know how sex and pregnancy works. IF IT IS DRY IT IS DEAD!!!
Me? I'm a little suspicious of statements like this. The sperm on the toilet seat scenario is so ridiculous as to be something from very young girl paranoia of a ridiculous odds. He's testing the level of acceptance for this story. Sad thing being, on this site he's probably going to get that blanket amnesty or forgivness.
I think he's working out an alibi for something a lot more to the point, that point being his penis at least touching his sisters vagina.
Maybe it's just my suspicious nature but I suspect someone old enough to type that well is either a poe or someone who may have some real concern about being charged with incest.
I believe the answer to this is a very qualified YES. If viable sperm is on a seat, and someones vagina is there soon enough, and the sperm is able to make its way to an available egg cell but the probability is very close to 0 in practise.
Wipe the seat !
As House, M.D., put it:
Yes, you can. But a guy has to be sitting on it first.
Also, please petition your school to have a sex ed program.
Double also, wipe the fucking seat!
And this is why ignorance is not bliss. He asked this question in all good faith simply because he has been left in the dark by a lack of suitable education, be it at home or at school. It's sad, really.
However, you don't need a class to know that you should wipe the seat after you're done.
Cletus, wuz you masterbatin' on that thar toylut seat? Y'all KNOWS that masterbayshun is uh SIN in thuh aies of KA-RIIIST are LAWRD an' if y'all duz it y'all's goin' tuh HELL fur AWL TAHME!!! Go PUH-RAY fuh thuh LAWRD'S FUHGIVNESS an' make shoah y'all MARRIES yoah sistuh befoah y'all gives huh a BAYBEH! AYYY-MENAH!
That is what soap and water is for. CLEAN THE FUCKING TOILET SEAT.
Wait, you didn't wank on the toilet seat with your sister sitting on it, did you?
Your sister must be sittng VERY oddly on the toilet seat...
IF she stradles the seat right after you've jacked off, perhaps she might get some inside her.
There's an easy fix for this; WIPE THE SEAT AFTER YOU'RE DONE!!!
"I get worried I may have gotten my sister pregnant if any of my sperm got on the toilet seat we share"
Secondhand Incest ...?! [/'Onee-chan...!'], as per drinking from the same can a woman's offered you being an Indirect Kiss ?! You have just learned precisely why we men must raise the seat when we use the toilet. [/MRA's old chestnut 'argument' annihilated]
"How long does semen last when not inside a woman?"
The way my Monty Python/Spike Milligan surreal- & also "Carry On" mucky double entendre fuelled- mind works, why did I read that as 'How long does sea ma n last when not inside a woman'?! Well, it depends how long he's been at sea, I suppose! X3
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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