Question for evolutionists: If you are so sure that humans are animals, then why don't you call your local Department of Motor Vehicles and ask them if animals can obtain driver's licenses? We know what they are going to say, don't we?
83 comments
Cute, but we're the animals with the highest brain function and people at the DMV aren't scientists. We do all the things that animals do: eat, shit, sleep, reproduce.
Because... apart from some species of ape their appendages are unsuited to driving a car designed for humans?
You ever tried pulling a plough designed for a Horse
Evolution =/= all animals are identical
Bring your goat down to the local DMV. If it can pass the test to get a learner's permit then I'll personally give it free driving instruction. Hell, I've taught fundies well enough to get their license, a goat can't be any more stupid.
When I was a kid, Life magazine featured both a horse named Gaylord and a dog named Shooshoo who could drive. They both needed vehicular modifications, of course, but while the dog liked to speed, the horse was a more prudent driver than most people. I don't know their ages or the jurisdictions where they had to get licenses, though.
OK, if we're not animals, why do we have so much in common with other mammals?
Oh fuck it, if this is the kind of argument they're coming up with these days, they're beyond any kind of rational debate.
This is definitely one of the most stupid comments I've ever seen on here.
Oh, and:image
"Question for evolutionists: If you are so sure that humans are animals, then why don't you call your local Department of Motor Vehicles and ask them if animals can obtain driver's licenses? We know what they are going to say, don't we?"
Because linguistically we make a distinction between ourselves and animals, nimrod.
This "idea" wasn't any funnier when Ray Comfort decided to call up a bunch of airlines and ask if his "relative" could fly with them and then telling them that his "relative" was an orangutan. It was stupid when he did it and it's even more so when people such as yourself try to riff on it.
In my area they will say , have them come in , do the written test ,the vision test, then do the practical driving test. If they can do that , and have the required identiification they would consider it. ;-)
"Question for evolutionists: If you are so sure that humans are animals, then why don't you call your local Department of Motor Vehicles and ask them if animals can obtain driver's licenses? We know what they are going to say, don't we?"
Yes. For example: 'Have you seen the film "Cannonball Run II"? After all, re. you Teabagger Neocunts...:
image image
...ergo, a limousine 'driven' by an orang-utan in a comedy film. Problem ? '
[/smartarse]
Good question. You should get right on that.
After all, we had a brain-injured chimp running the most powerful nation on Earth from 2000 to 2008, so driving can't be that much of a step.
image
Yeah, I went there.
That would be like saying that since Americans, Canadians, and Australians are (mostly) descended from Europeans, they should be allowed to join the European Union. Or, like saying that a rectangle with dimensions of 1 x 42 is clearly a square, because all squares are rectangles, therefore (by fundie "logic") all rectangles MUST be squares, right?!
All humans may be animals, Tea Partier, but not all animals are humans.
Question for evolutionists: If you are so sure that humans are animals, then why don't you call your local Department of Motor Vehicles and ask them if animals can obtain driver's licenses? We know what they are going to say, don't we?
What does it have to do with the theory of evolution? The idea that humans are animals is much, much older than Charles Darwin.
Please tell me you can't be so shockingly, startlingly, mind-fuckingly stupid to think that a real argument against the established scientific truth of evolution? If you, in fact, do, please do us and the rest of humanity a favour and go get your tubes tied or have a vasectomy -- as the case warrants -- so you can't inflict mankind with what would surely be idiot children...
N.
Apparently, humans are minerals....after all, the fundies believe in a 6000-year-old dirtman.
A fundie's head is full of rocks.
Pretty poor argument. We don't simply differentiate between "humans" and "all [other] animals" for rights and privileges. Rather, there are lots of animals that also have special rights, privileges, and responsibilities. Dogs can be put into service as therapy animals or for other medical reasons, and we rescue them from dogfigthing rings and other forms of abuse. Mice, on the other hand, are not afforded the same privileges. While we might think it cruel, nobody's going to get arrested for making mice fight.
Setting all that aside, I would argue that if any other animal were to demonstrate that they could safely operate a car, THEN we might start giving licenses to non-humans.
Well, since we know we can't trust scientists to give us scientific answers, it stands to reason that we would turn to the DMV. I don't trust Doctors for medical advice, either. I generally ask the Dairy Manager at the nearest Stop and Shop. Prostate exam? Rubber gloves, isle 6. Dead people are much better at predicting the weather than meteorologists.
@ Horsefeathers
Related to Comfort? That offends me.
BTW, they not only give drivers' licenses to animals, the issue them to apes.
Just because all humans are animals, does not mean that all animals are humans. Although humans can manipulate the controls of a car, we can not fly like birds, who need no vehicle to operate. And clearly, be it dogs, birds, lizards, humans, all animals have different traits .....that evolved due to our particular circumstances. It would be silly to expect dogs to drive cars as it would be equally silly to expect humans to live in bird nests in trees.
"we know what they are going to say, dont we?"
OH...and just a tid bit for your pleasure. My brother's dog (dearly departed now) had his very own credit card. With his name on it. A card in which he paid his vet bills. Yeah, ok, so my brother wrote the check from his bank account when the bills came in the mail. But that is not altogether different than what many parents do when their kids are in college perhaps.....
When my dog can pass the written and driver exam, I'll advocate for him to have a driver's license along with his flee collar.
In the meantime, you are an idiot.
image
(emphasis added):
Melvin: 'He sure looks a little... uh, a little... uh... he weird!'
Tony: 'I mean, it must be easy to get a licence in this town , huh?!'
Uncle Kyle: 'I've got a slogan: If a monkey can drive - so can YOU ! '
-"Cannonball Run II"
@Comrade Potatovich
"They should make a modern-age Blackadder where Baldrick is a creationist."
Nah, wouldn't work. Baldrick's mother is a gorilla , y'see. X3
Question for creationsts: If you are so sure humans are dirt, then why don't you call your local Department of Motor Vehicles and ask them if a pile of dirt can obtain drivers licences? We know what they are goint to say, right?
Reminds me of slavery, when slaves could break the law but, for some reason, were not considered humans. Funny, eh?
That probably sounded understated and profound in his head. like it was the obvious thing that evolutionists were all overlooking. "Hmmm. Hey. Now that you mention it, I don't think my dog CAN drive. I've never even seen him try. He always calls, "Shotgun!," but I thought it was just because he likes to work the radio."
In the fly-on-the-wall (or 'in-the-car') documentary series (and my favourite of the ploce reality TV programmes) "Road Wars":
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Road_Wars_%28TV_series%29
The narrator Lee Boardman sometimes refers to the car criminals (speeding, reckless driving, drunk driving etc) as 'Muppets', so...!
If any animal, of adult age, manages to pass the written and practical test required to obtain a driver's license, then that animal can indeed obtain a driver's license.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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