[from another imaginary conversation]
GOD: Son, would it help you if I told you that my church is about to enter a time when many go to prison and I sent you ahead to show them how to bear up in prison?
38 comments
Because that whole thing about St. Paul being jailed obviously didn't cover that point.
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.. but wishes aren't horses, so beggars don't ride. "Would it help you if" doesn't mean a thing unless the conditional is actually true.
I think Kent is trying to get moved to a nice little minimum security psychiatric hospital.
The steel bars and large angry men who don't take kindly to his particular brand of stupidity must be getting to him.
"The steel bars and large angry men who don't take kindly to his particular brand of stupidity must be getting to him."
Yeah, and the large angry men's steel rods, too.
I sent you ahead to show them how to bear up in prison
God wants prisoners to whine and complain, refuse to take any responsibility for what they've done, and bemoan the unfairness of a legal system that jails crooks even though they follow the right religion?
GOD: 'Cause I could tell you that, but, you know, it would by lying. And I really shouldn't lie. Remember commandment number nine, "thou shalt not bear false witness"? By the way, I've noticed you having some trouble with that one, and also with "thou shalt not steal".
I bet Hovind knows damn well that he's a lying, theiving fraud. These crazy dialouges he's having are just to get people to buy into his "look at me I'm so innocent" act.
By the way, if you read it, you'll notice Satan gets in on the conversation too. Apparently Kent Hovind is so important that he gets to talk to both God and Satan one-on-one.
"I sent you ahead to show them how to bear up in prison"
Kent's hearing isn't what it used to be be, God actually said, "to show them who to beat up in prison"
Easy mistake to make.
@jsonitsac
I've gotten the impression that he's writing out the blog entries by hand and sending them to one of his staffers, who then posts it.
Or he might well have some internet access -- I'm no expert on the penal system, but inmates have phone and TV access -- why not internet access in a lower security prison?
Perhaps, Kent, if you had 'rendered unto Caesar' in the first place, as your Lord commands, you wouldn't be in this stiffy situation.
Son, all you have to do to get into prison is to not render unto Ceasar.
But I told them to render unto Ceasar. I wouldn't look good if I didn't take my own advice.
Don't worry, these are fundies. They're too stupid to notice.
Son, would it hurt you to face up to the fact that you're a liar, a fraud, and a self-obsessed sycophant with a messiah complex?
Seriously, get over yourself. And stop telling people you're talking to me face-to-face. I'm way too busy dealing with this shit in Darfur and the Middle East to listen to you whine.
Confused?
So were we! You can find all of this, and more, on Fundies Say the Darndest Things!
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