I am what most would consider quite religious,, but I will tell you right her and now, without question or doubt, that God is NOT fair, nor do you want Him to be!
If God we’re fair, he would condemn even the most religious of us to an eternity in the pits of hell! We are sinners, each and every one of us. God on the other hand is perfection, and the two cannot exist with each other. Yet, He is also extremely willing to forgive us even the most severe of our sins.
When God extends that forgiveness to someone, the “stains” of his/her sin are washed white with the blood of the lamb (the Lamb is Jesus Christ, who lived a perfect life and died for our sins so that we don’t have to) and are no longer visible, even to Him. This is why it is said that the only way to God is through his Son. Jesus Christ is the only way to achieve full forgiveness of any sin, and so Jesus is the only way into heaven. Otherwise, God would be fair, and that would be most detrimental to every human who has ever lived, for none would be granted everlasting life.
No, God is NOT fair! He is merciful!
You have obviously been thinking about this question for a while. I would strongly suggest that you meet some Christian friends who will be able to help you with the many questions that we’ve all had about God. He/she will be willing to explain things to you whenever something doesn’t quite make sense, or even when there seems to be a contradiction.
I will be praying to the Lord that you soon find your way, friend!